Regret

“Clipping Clue-Pons” POV Fic CHALLENGE

Regret

By Julie

Rating: G

Disclaimer: These characters belong to Paramount; I make no money from doing this.
Genre: POV challenge, Angst, Short
Summary: Archer's thoughts after he has reluctantly granted Trip's
request for a transfer to Columbia.

Jonathan Archer sat staring at the computer screen in front of him. He couldn’t believe what had just happened, and he couldn’t believe how bad he felt.

Trip wanted a transfer from the ship. To leave Enterprise, all his friends-- and he had a lot of them. He had heard the request with incredulity, disbelief, dismay … he could go on. He was devastated, as a captain he was losing an incomparable Chief Engineer. As a man he was losing his treasured best friend, the one he had leaned on so often, and trusted so implicitly. He drew in a deep breath as he switched on the recorder.

Captain’s personal log, supplemental,

I have had to agree to Commander Tucker’s request to transfer to Columbia. I have done so only under duress. Commander Tucker blames himself for the injury to Jhamel by the Telepresence Unit, and nothing either I or Doctor Phlox say, will convince him otherwise. I know that Phlox believes, as do I, that there is more to it.

I don’t remember when I actually realised that there was something stronger than friendship between him and T’Pol. It might have been in the Expanse, but I had so many other things on my mind - we all did! I know we drifted apart for a while--all the time he was grieving for Lizzie, what was I doing? Why wasn’t I there for him? Maybe he wouldn’t be leaving now?

“Computer pause,” he stopped, the words were beginning to choke him. He took some deep breaths and tickled Porthos’ ears before continuing. “Resume.”

“The teasing and sparring became more noticeable in T’Pol’s second year on the ship. I was attracted to her for a while myself, so I understand why he might have been; but strangely, I never even imagined that he would look at her’ that way.’ She only started to attend movie nights because he pestered her about it. She tried human food because of his cajoling and teasing. But I never thought they were more than friends.

Maybe it was the neuro-pressure. He was in a bad way after Lizzie’s death, Phlox was glad that at least someone could help him. And where was I? I heard the rumours but I dismissed them. The ship’s grapevine was pretty busy at that time, mostly to take people’s minds off other things. I hear neuro-pressure is an intimate process--wrap that up with high emotions in a tense situation … I suppose it makes sense. God, we faced some terrible things in there…”

“Computer pause,” he said again. Closing his eyes he tried to block out the memory of faces of crew members who never returned. Choices that he’d had to make, deaths on his conscience …Sim …

“After the weapon was destroyed and we came back home, I thought it’d be ok for everyone. Except for the nightmares of course …” his voice trailed off again. “But we were home, Earth was safe… but it didn’t work out that way. When he came back from Vulcan, then I knew. Then I was certain, but it was too late. He’s kept it to himself, when once he would have shared his problems with me, confided in me. We’d lost our closeness, and now I’ve lost him.

I always knew he’d move on, get his own command, and serve on a different ship. I just never realised it would be so hard.”

Archer poured himself a glass of whisky and leaned back in his seat. Silently he raised his glass. To Commander Tucker colleague and friend, I’ll miss you.

fin

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A whole mess of folks have made comments

Very touching, Julie. All of these POV stories are so SAD! I wonder why that is?

Ahh, an Archer POV. Sad musings from our Captain and the distance he feels from Trip. In Trip's defense, friend or no, his relationship with T'Pol would be a fraternization issue, with a controversial inter-species twist. So, in a way, T'Pol became a wedge between them. Unintentionally, of course. But Trip obviously felt he couldn't share this important development in his life with his former best friend Archer. That is sad.

Thanks for sharing.

A great POV. This challenge is producing some great stuff. I liked how you kept it short but packed a lot into.

A great POV. This challenge is producing some great stuff. I liked how you kept it short but packed a lot into it.

Great POV and nice placement of the scene as well. I figure it was a pretty big blow to Archer as well.

And yes, lots of sad stories so far. Good but sad. I guess that's in keeping with the land of angst that we visited for the last couple of years on the series. ;)

Very nice Julie. These stories are giving me a whole new perspective on some of the other characters in the show. I'm enjoying these little fics very much and yours was no exception. :)

Awwwww. Stupid Columbia garbage face. Great story, I'm definitely loving this challenge! Haven't had this much fun since the Mirror Universe stuff came out! :)

Thanks, all of you, for your comments. This is my first post on this side so I was a little nervous - and I know Archer isn't everyone's favourite, but I love his friendship with Trip. Lots more angst to come from this challenge, I'm sure.

Great job Julie! Good take on Archer's POV. And as the Buffy St. Marie song says "you don't know what you've got til it's gone".

I havent shed a tear in almost 3 years...untill Archer raised a toast to his pal....thank you :)