Whispers From the Depths of Space: Not.Dead!

"Clipping Clue-Pons" POV CHALLENGE

Whispers From the Depths of Space: Not.Dead!

By Linda

Rating: G
Disclaimer: I do not own these characters and have made no money off them.
Genre: POV Challenge, romance, friendship
Summary: Kuvak is the member of the Vulcan High Command who opposed V’Las. He is (as I see him) the estranged father of Kov, the V’tosh Ka’tur who Trip convinced to contact his father when he was very ill. Kuvak is a perceptive politician who can spot a bonding with the most miniscule of evidence.

AN: This POV goes along with my story line in The Tides of Space over on Soval’s Annex. In fact, a portion of the final chapter was edited and inserted here.

Kuvak had been thinking about this human who had convinced his son to contact him after years of silence. He would be visiting Mr. Tucker the next day in a Vulcan hospital, for when he recovered, Kuvak had a most vital favor to impose upon the young man. Kuvak’s gratitude was overshadowed by fear these days, as Kov’s ship had disappeared. He knew the Vahklas had visited Earth around the time of the Xindi attack, but it had not been reported as damaged. The orbiting space dock which had serviced the Vahklas said the ship had departed 15 minutes before the attack, on a course quite different than the incoming Xindi vessel. This gave Kuvak some hope that his son was still among the living. He had employed his political ally, Soval, who had resumed his duties as Ambassador to Earth, to do some research for him and the results of this research had provoked a vicious attack on Trip Tucker in a quiet street on peaceful Vulcan. But all this effort and its unforeseen consequence, led toward one goal: Kuvak wanted to find his son.

Since Trip’s brief encounter with Kov, Kuvak had followed Mr. Tucker’s career with great interest. The events in the Expanse had been avidly monitored by the Vulcan High Command, despite a policy of non-involvement. When the Enterprise returned, battered but intact, Minister Kuvak had breathed a sigh of relief for Trip Tucker as if the young man had been his own son. When the Enterprise became instrumental in the demise of the High Command, Kuvak was spared the degradation of V’Las and he became part of the new Vulcan Planetary Council which replaced the High Command. After consolidating his position, he turned to private issues, sending an invitation to Mr. Tucker to visit Vulcan during his next leave. Trip accepted and asked if he could bring a Vulcan friend, a fellow crewmember who had lost her mother in the Forge bombing. Kuvak knew exactly who this was, as he had studied the events leading up to the arrest of V’Las and was instrumental in the preparations for the treason trial that would commence next month.

The padd containing the photos lay on the table in Kuvak’s study, next his mobility chair. This chair allowed him to get around quite easily, but he did not like to use it in public and give the impression he was not in the best of health and therefore not up to retaining his office. With slightly unsteady fingers; he picked up the padd again. He had not advanced in Vulcan’s political structure or survived the downfall of one government without a penetrating intellect that could quickly size people up. These photos told the story of two bondings. This first photo showed a bonded pair standing on the bridge of the Enterprise, and was taken less than a month ago. The photo of the second pair showed them standing in a ground-to-orbit shuttle station in a Florida town that no longer existed.

Kuvak studied the first photo. The pair in question was standing on opposite sides of the bridge. Mr. Tucker had the look of the experienced veteran he was, though a touch of the boyish charm from the earlier photo that Kov had sent him, was still evident. Mr. Tucker, Trip, as he was informally called, was leaning against a console with his arms crossed. His eyes were on the Vulcan woman across the bridge at the science station and she was in eye contact with him. He knew that contact - the same as he had with his own wife. They were in telepathic conversation. The evidence was unmistakable to a bonded Vulcan, though he doubted the rest of the bridge crew was even aware of it. So Mr. Tucker had charmed a Vulcan other than his own son. What power these humans had! No wonder Soval was afraid of them, but so fascinated by them that he would probably spend the rest of his life with them. And what a great loss for Soval, this admiral friend - almost as bad as the loss of his mate years ago. Most people lived such sad lives.

Kuvak rearranged the photos from Earth again, and decided to make prints of them. Their order was important for the telling of his most unbelievable story. But Soval’s research was thorough and there could be no doubt. The pair in the Florida ground station was his son and Trip’s sister. They were touching hands and smiling into each other’s eyes - not yet bonded - but not far from it by the look of things. And it was taken mere minutes before they boarded the shuttle to the Vahklas which was a half hour from leaving Earth orbit. Elizabeth Tucker had not been on the planet when the attack had occurred. Elizabeth Tucker was still alive.

The next day in a hospital on Vulcan …

“Then these were probably the last photos ever taken of Lizzie” said Trip, tears openly running down his face. Kuvak lowered his eyes to avoid this display of emotion. He continued handing Trip the photos one by one. Trip was taking a long look at each; in the carefully planned order Kuvak had arranged them. The last showed Liz leaning toward Kov with an intent and, yes, adoring look. Kov was looking at her equally engrossed. The photo cut off at waist level but their arms tapered toward each other as if they were holding hands. In the background was a sign indicating they were in the Florida Shuttle- to-Space-Dock Ground Station.

“This is a very intimate pose for a Vulcan, Trip, even for a V’tosh Ka’tur. I believe this photo was taken of them unaware. The young lady who gave these to Soval said she thought Liz and Kov had grown very close. Liz had told her she intended to do something impulsive and very unlike herself. She had accepted Tavin’s invitation to a short cruise on the Vahklas since she was not needed on a construction site for another month. Her family might try to stop her, so she left a message on her computer to be sent three days after she left.” Kuvak coughed and stopped talking for a minute. He put a hand to his forehead and took a couple of deep rasping breaths.

After a moment, Kuvak looked up again at Trip and continued. “This young lady, Sandra Hopkins, said she drove Liz and Kov to the Florida ground station so Liz could leave her car home. Sandra was only an acquaintance of Liz from college days, visiting a friend in your hometown. She drove out of the attack area after dropping Liz and Kov off at the station. This friend of hers died in the attack, so Sandra had no reason to concern herself further with the town. Sandra did not know your family or that Liz had been listed as dead in the attack. She was a photographer who took pictures wherever she went and threw most of them into storage boxes and forgot them. It took all of Soval’s expertise to find this woman. Because of her evidence though, I have to conclude your sister was not in Florida when the Xindi attacked.” Kuvak sat back in the bedside chair to note Trip’s reaction to this news.

“I don’t want to believe you. I don’t think I can.” Trip took a deep breath. “I thought she was beyond hurt now. That was the only consolation I had. And now you say she is out there somewhere. She could be in pain and dying all over again.” Trip slammed his head against the pillow. “All those dreams where I felt her die in agony. Felt the flesh burning off her bones. All those times my enjoyment of a piece of pecan pie was spoiled because I knew Lizzie would never again be able to enjoy this treat. All those stabs of pain knowing her talent had been cut short and she would never reach her potential, never know the joy of holding her own child in her arms. If she is alive, I suffered greatly for nothing. And after a long time of suffering and having come to accept her death and be at peace with it, the pain starts all over again. I do not want this.”

“Don’t wish her dead when she may not be,” pleaded Kuvak in a quiet dignified Vulcan way. “You have hope now, as do I. I thought Humans were at their best when they had hope.”

Trip stared at Kuvak. “Hope? I am tired of worrying about my sister! Tired of dwelling on her horrible fate! You make me wish she had never been born!”

“What you are feeling is natural and common. The hospital psychologist told me this might be one reaction. Vulcan and Human emotional patterns are not that different. Let me restore your hopeful thoughts of your sister. T’Nar attacked you and that was the proof your sister is alive.”

“Why? How can a woman who never met me or my sister be proof that Lizzy is alive?” demanded Trip.

Kuvak hesitated. He was reluctant to share long held secrets of his species with outsiders. But Trip had bonded with a Vulcan, so he should no longer be considered an outsider. “A bonded Vulcan can feel the pull of their mate during the Pon Farr. Do you know about that?”

Trip nodded. “T’Pol has told me.”

“This pull, this bond, it is very sensitive and the distance is of no consequence, especially during the first Pon Farr a male goes through. If the male must take another mate because it is impossible to return, that can be detected through the bond with the original mate. And the psychological signature of the usurper can be felt. This psychological signature is shared by those of close genetic relationship, like that of brother and sister. It is especially identifiable if the siblings have a close emotional tie. T’Nar felt Kov enter the Pon Farr. She felt him take another mate. Since she had seen these photos of Kov and Liz at my residence, and those of you and Kov on your ship, she identified you on the street when you were on your way to visit me. She then violated your personal space by touching you, identified the signature of her rival in you, and tried to take her revenge. She almost killed you except for T’Pol coming to your defense. I can only conclude from this that both your sister and my son are alive.”

“I wish I could believe that Sir. I really do. I had a crisis moment with my parents when my mother got angry because I took Lizzy’s photo off a table in her home and hid it in a drawer. I could not stand seeing her smiling up at me so life-like. So I angrily told Mom to let her go. Mom said Lizzie would always have a place in her house. She was still alive there and I had no right to kill her off. Me, kill Lizzie? It was not me that killed her but she was just as dead! Mom raged at me. She told me that it was I who should have died taking all those risks in space. If she had the power she would not hesitate to sacrifice my life if she could have Lizzie back. Lizzie meant far more to her than I did.

I was devastated and stumbled outside vowing never to set foot in my parents’ home again if that was how they felt. T’Pol came out to me on the lawn and said my mother did not really value one child over another, she was just speaking out of anger and grief. Then T’Pol led me back inside where she and my mother embraced and cried, one for the loss of her mother and the other for the loss of her daughter. When they stopped crying, a new mother-daughter bond was formed and they drew me into their circle. Then I went and put Lizzie’s photo back on the table. After that things started to get better.”

A nurse came in to take Trip’s vital signs. He and Kuvak assumed their public faces for a few minutes. Kuvak used these minutes to contemplate the different way Trip and his mother approached the grieving process. Kuvak came to the realization that the rift between himself and his wife was based on the logical fact that the two of them grieved for their lost daughter T’Kora in different ways. With this knowledge, perhaps he could make amends to his wife. Then Kuvak silently made a telepathic appeal that his son and Trip’s sister still lived. He thought he felt a telepathic return in the positive.

When the nurse left, Trip seemed to sink into himself and continued his monologue. “I have spent all the negative emotion I care to on Lizzy. I was finally at peace with her death. I could take her photo out in my quarters on Enterprise once in awhile and look at her with love untarnished by pain. I could recall memories of our childhood and her antics to my friends and to T’Pol and even my parents. These memories were once again a joy instead of a deep stabbing pain. And now because of what you are telling me, it is possible to have to go through all that pain again. I will now have to live with uncertainty and worry. I don’t want to do that.” Trip slipped deeper into the hospital bed, an anguished look pasted on his pale face.

Kuvak leaned forward over his cane and spoke with un-Vulcan-like fervor. “Then find them and end this uncertainty! Take a leave of absence from Starfleet; I will provide a ship. I am too frail to do this myself, so go yourself after you have recovered. Please do this for both of us. Find them and bring them to Vulcan where I can keep them safe. If Kov has truly bonded with your sister, I will accept that as the price of being able to have him returned to me before I die.” Kuvak’s voice wavered. Father and son were closer in nature than Trip had suspected.

Trip looked into the eyes of this haunted man. Trip was by nature unable to resist heartfelt appeals. “All right then sir, I will do this. But I want you to know that I do not relish this assignment. It makes me feel weary and depressed. What if I don’t find them? Space is a huge place. I have good reason to know.”

“Then we will both have to accept that we may never see them again and live in hope that they are still alive. I admire the human spirit, which I see as composed of hope and action in the face of great odds. In the same situation, a Vulcan usually becomes inactive and resigned to fate. I know that your spirit has been sorely abused. But you once convinced my son to contact me when he was determined never to communicate with me again. That gave me hope that I could get him back again. I wish to return the favor and give you the hope of returning your sister to you. The hope that we both will get back the people we love, that makes life worth living. This state of hope, of not giving up in the face of whatever the tides of space throw our way, may just be the salvation of both our species. ”

Kuvak touched Trip’s arm briefly. Trip turned his head and made eye contact again with the ill and elderly Vulcan. “Ok sir. It’s a deal. We are now a team with a mission.” And having said this, hope did start to grow in Trip in spite of himself. Lizzy! Dear sweet Lizzy…alive! He flashed on her grin, her walk, her voice tone, as he never had been able to recapture it since her ‘death’. Why did these memories surface unbidden now and not when he was grieving and needing them so?

Trip looked at Kuvak with a depth of emotion the Vulcan might never have seen, even in another human. “Give me time. I will probably someday be able to thank you for restoring hope. To both of us. We are tied to each other by this. It would be an honor to work with you.”

Trip felt drained, but having made this decision, he felt he could now rest. He drifted off to sleep and Kuvak stood to leave. T’Pol would be coming in to sit with Trip as soon as Kuvak returned home to let her have his ground car.

Kuvak leaned on his cane for the long walk down the hospital corridor. He would go home to his wife and his lovely house guest. T’Pol had spent long hours talking to his wife. As with Trip’s mother, Kuvak’s wife and T’Pol had formed a friendship based on loss, taking comfort in each other. But when Trip was healed, T’Pol would be leaving and Kuvak’s house would return to the silence of absent children. Yet it would not be empty of hope, for Trip and T’Pol would soon be following the trail of the Vahklas.

From the moment Kuvak perceived the relationship by viewing the bridge photo, he knew the difficult path Trip and T’Pol had chosen. That they not walk alone along this path, that Kov and Elizabeth join them, would be vital to their psychological health – living as they must – between two worlds and two species that, in the main, would not accept them. And should it be possible for them to have children, as Kuvak desperately hoped, it could be the start of a whole new species: possibly the fullest flowering of the IDIC principle. With the planting of this seed of hope, Kuvak could face the future in peace.

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A whole mess of folks have made comments

Beautifully written! I think I'll visit Soval's to read the rest of the story!

Good one, now I wanna reade about them meeting again :). Are you going to write about that or is the story finished?

I am working on a reunion story. So far, it is a bunch of notes on ideas for it.

Oh very cool. Please do continue this story idea. What a very interesting idea.

Trip's voice is a little too formal... too correct. Otherwise very good read.

Thanks Tracy. Yes! I see it now, Trip IS being a bit too formal. I was thinking he would give a lot of respect to Kuvak as a high ranking Vulcan elder, but then, he should have acted the same with Soval on the Enterprise, and he didn't. I will have to 'loosen Trip up' in further conversations with Kuvak!

Fascinating story line, Linda. I get the impression, though, that most of this story is a summary of a much longer fic. I think it boils down once again to the "show, don't tell" issue that so many of us amateur writers have so much trouble with. I'd love to see you expand on this... maybe start the story by showing us the attack by the Vulcan female instead of describing it after the fact. It would be a great whodunit. Why would this strange Vulcan woman that Trip has never seen before attack him? Why is he on Vulcan to begin with? Let us see Kuvak do the ground work and solve the mystery. I see great potential for a fascinating story here.

Distracted, I think I was trying to just write a POV and it became more. An opening with the attack scene as a hook probably would have been better instead of starting with Kuvak's background and thoughts! I think I will re-write this as the start of my sequel to The Tides of Space where Trip does find his sister. Hmm... I better get started!

Goody goody! I can't wait! : )

Awesome that we're going to see more of this. Looking forward to it.

Neat idea, now I have to go to Soval's Annex and look up your other story! Great stuff, and well done! :)

I read this fic over several times, more to give it the benefit of the doubt than anything else. I don't like it. Besides the stiff, formal language, which I could overlook, Trip's reaction to the possibility of Lizzie's being alive was not only unbelievable, but offensive. Someone like Trip, who had a loved one die untimely, would not worry about how they would now have to worry about them and possibly grieve over them all over again. That's a fantastically self-centered, cowardly, intensely infantile reaction, one I simply cannot believe that Trip would be capable of. Someone who could have such a reaction would never have allowed themselves to love anyone in the first place, for precisely these reasons; that they might someday have to grieve for them. That's the cry of a child who has just lost a pet and will never have another one, or an adolescent who has just broken up with a first sweetheart and will never have another because "it hurts too much." As an adult, Trip would know that loss is a part of life; that the pain of loss is never so great as the joy of loving in the first place. He should have been disbelieving at first, but then blazingly eager to find out the truth. The way the story was written just doesn't cut it.

Well Graybear I disagree with you on first thinking about this. But I can see that you had an intense emotional reaction to the way I presented the character. And I am glad you told me about it. Emotions are not logical and many emotions adults have ARE childish.

I have found that people have wildly different reactions to my writing and the writing of other people on this site and elsewhere. And perhaps one's writing says more about ones self than it does about a fictional character - which actually is interpreted in varying shades by everyone who writes about them.

Well you vented and I hope that helps. You sure have given me something to think about. Thank you. And I really mean thank you. Your comment has reached me and will have a definite effect on my thinking - whether I see it from your point of view, even a little, or not.

And please don't stop giving honest opinions, especially ones so deeply felt! They are the best kind in the long run.

Dear Linda, I'm glad you took my comments as honest, because they very much were honest. I have no problem with people sincerely disagreeing with me(I have a wife and two grown daughters, so I had to get used to that early). In my lifetime, I have lost both my parents and both parents in law and lived through my wife miscarrying our first child. There is simply no way that I wouldn't want to have any of them back again, even if I had to go through the entire grieving process all over again. I can't believe that anyone who has truly loved anyone else wouldn't feel the same way. Maybe I reacted to your writing too viscerally, but if so, that only shows that you did a good job.
I still don't like this story and won't read it again, but that's just me. I do like, and tend to re-read, a lot of your other stuff. Keep up the good work.

Ok Graybear, I wish you would come back and enter a dialog, but I suppose you might think it not worth it. I rethought what you said about Trip as an adult would not react this way. But I have not changed my opinion that what I wrote could be a legitimate reaction and in character for Trip.

1. Trip, in my opinion, acted childishly when shortly after the Xindi attack, he got real angry at Malcolm for asking about a memorial for Liz. He really lit into Malcolm, which is part of my thinking he could react the way he does here in my in my fic.

2. In the episode The Forgotten, Trip said things like "yes it was too much to remember her" to his assistant engineer's ghost. And then he kicked the unit T'Pol brought him just before he confided his feelings to her. These are honest feelings and Trip is nothing if not honest. And these feelings could be considered somewhat childish. So why do you think that Trip could not be childish? And these are real feelings that real people do express and I feel what I wrote could be projected from these scenes of Trip's which are canon.

3. Trip had come to a place of acceptance of Lizzy's death at the end of The Forgotton. And to have to live this painful time all over again would be very difficult because he cared so very deeply for her. I feel she was the very image of woman to him, of hearth, home, the home world. What he had lost was the center of his soul and he had tried to hide from that fact for a long time. Who would not balk at having to go through that again?

4. In my story Trip has been injured and is on medication in a hospital. This is not a condition where people are at there best or in complete control of their emotions. They say things that they would not otherwise say. Haven't you seen this? If you haven't, I hope you don't. It is not pretty. But I guess I failed to show that very well in my story.

5. This is an initial reaction for Trip. As I planned to continue the story, of course Trip would be estatic about having his sister back!

I guess I was miffed by your use of the word 'offensive'. I find Trip a character who represents much that is the best in humanity, but like all people, has his faults and must and grow to overcome them. I was not trying to be demeaning to Trip.

And I was not being sarcastic when I said thank you for your opinion. I could feel your honesty, but on rereading my last comment, I though - gosh it could be taken that way. The only think I got ticked off about was your use of the word 'offensive'. Well I find it 'offensive' that you probably have done a hit and run here. You probably won't be back to carry on a dialog as an adult yourself.

Now I hope my comments are not offensive to those who have left other comments. I appreciate both all your kind words and your constructive criticism. I guess Graybear's comment just got to me a bit. But without readers, there would be no writers. So to paraphrase a really GOOD writer - bless you all, every one.

Graybear, I just wrote the last comment before I saw your second comment. I am glad you DID come back to discuss this as I feel very strongly about what I wrote. So I guess we just have to disagree. But that is very IDIC. So thanks for being here!

Linda, no problems with agreeing to disagree. I agree that people can be childish (I'm 55, a grandfather, and I like super-heroes and Disney cartoons, how can I not agree?)I just don't think that Trip, having lived through the grieving process not only with Lizzie, but also with the others on Enterprise who didn't survive, would be so opposed to and frightened of the possibility of Lizzie's survival. To me, it just doesn't feel real. But it's your story and if it feels real to you, then have at it. Maybe when you get him into his quest it'll feel more like the Trip I'm expecting. I can see why you did this, in one way; stories are always about conflict, of one sort or another, and a round of "oh, let's all immediately agree" wouldn't be terribly interesting.
Go for it!

I'm afraid I have the same problems as Graybear. You know I praise all your other stuff, so at least you know those comments were honest too. For me, one way to salvage the story (with a slight revision) would be to turn alot of those statements Trip made into breif internal thoughts that fly into head head, before he represses them.

Having said that, you are brave to write an imperfect Trip. That story you wrote about Trip's childhood (A Florida Childhood) also had a imperfect Trip, which made that story engaging and memorable.

However, this time I just don't buy it. One other "problem" I have with the current story, but here I am in the minority, I REALLY beleive Trip had wonderful parents. I am bothered by all the stories where they turn out to be heartless, (and in some other people's stories, racist). But that's just me. I think I'm outvoted on that one.

Strong emotion makes people irrational. Even jealous Vulcans can be driven to attack a stranger on the street :) . Someone can be a good person (like Trip) and yet still react in a way that might sound childishly offensive to a third party. I have seen grieving people react in totally atypical ways. Grief can do weird things to your thinking. Some people are forgetting the natural human aversion to pain, and the perfectly normal idea that Trip might be dreading the thought of going through that whole agonizing process again.

JustTripn, that is a great idea - the internal thoughts. People do have these childish thoughts and feelings but keep them to themselves alot. Great fix for the problem with the story! I will use it in the revision and hopefully it will mollify people's objections - somewhat, yet let me have my interpretation - somewhat! Miigwech (thank you)! Sometimes it takes a committee to write a story. I think that is what the team for the Enterprise episodes did - bounce ideas off each other.

And thanks Blackn'blue for reinforcing the fact that humans can be childish at times and then very adult and logical at others. There is a time for every thing in its season, so the song goes... Maybe I just have to learn to write it better so it is believable to more people. I don't mean to offend, I just want to reach out to people with a believable story! Thanks.

Well, this is discussion is already quite developped, and I'll only mention that I have to agree that I read over Trip's description of his reaction to Lizzie's death because it just felt more like internal thoughts than a discussion between the two. But I like Kuvak's personnality and adore the last sentence about "the fullest flowering of the IDIC principle".... And the idea of Lizzie still being alive is nice, although Trip's reaction seemed odd to me just like to others. Still, good work and looking forward to how this'll develop.