Consequences

Consequences

by Quills

Rating: G, drama, friendship
Spoilers: "Cogenitor."

The orchestral music resonated through the tiny room as the sound threatened to shake the very walls while the chorale voices bellowed in full force. The selection was a Berlioz piece whose powerful ambience had always helped Trip Tucker escape...at least briefly...that which troubled him. Unfortunately, this time, not even Berlioz could help the engineer escape the image he could not blot out of his mind's eye.

She wasn't beautiful. No...not in the classical sense, but she did have a simple pure kind of beauty that so few people possessed. She had a spirit within her...a spirit like a newborn child full of wonder and curiosity. In truth, that was precisely what she had been...had been. Those words played over and over in Trip Tucker's mind. A gentle soul whose life was cut short because he knew what was 'right'.

Trip Tucker stood up from his bunk and walked over to the view port once more. He had done this several times this evening. The stars had always given him comfort. Now, nothing gave him comfort. Not the stars...not the music...not even his Captain and friend. In truth...he didn't deserve it. 'Charles', the name the cogenitor had taken, certainly had no comfort given to it. A tear threatened to fall but he willed it away. He wouldn't cry for himself. He hadn't been able to cry for 'Charles' so he would be damned if he would cry for himself. John was right, it was his fault. He leaned against the view port, laying his head against the bulkhead as he closed his eyes and wished for sleep to claim him.

Opening his eyes, he looked up questioningly. He had thought he had heard something, but he wasn't sure. Now he was hearing things, he thought to himself, wonderful. He needed sleep, but it just wasn't coming. Maybe he should see the Doctor. He stood up from the fetal position he had fallen into by the view port. His limbs ached and he was sure he strained a muscle in his back from the awkward position. He didn't care. Slowly he made his way to the door and then to sickbay.

The door slid open and he was about to step out when he stopped himself suddenly. If he had gone any further he would have run directly into Sub Commander T'Pol.

"T'Pol? What are you doin here?"

"I came to speak with you." she replied as she 'examined' him. He looked like what the Captain often referred to as 'hell'. "I have pressed your door signal several times."

"Sorry, didn't hear it." he responded as he headed back into his quarters. Now that T'Pol was here, sleep was not something he would getting any of for a while.

He let himself fall into the cushion chair in the corner as he let his arms dangle over the side. "So, what did you want?" he asked tersely.

She stood silently for a moment as she took at the disheveled form of the ship's Chief Engineer. Perhaps this was not a wise decision she thought to herself. He appears to be in mode of self deprecation. He may not be willing to listen. She considered this briefly, but resigned herself to continue with her original intention.

"I wish to speak to you about your dealings with the cogenitor."

Tucker leaned his head back and closed his eyes briefly. He did not need this. A smug superior Vulcan showing up on his doorstep to give him an 'I told you so' lecture.

"I know I did somthin' wrong T'Pol," said Tucker as he stared at the floor for several moments before looking up at the Vulcan. "I don't need you to come down here and remind me...all right?"

T'Pol looked at Trip Tucker as she corrected him. "I did not come here to 'remind' you of anything Commander. I merely wished to see how you were doing."

A mocking grin played across Trip Tucker's face "I'm doin’ peachy...for uh damn murderer."

T'Pol raised a brow in surprise. She would never comprehend the human capacity to impart greater blame upon oneself than truly existed. No, that was not quite true. She could comprehend it in some small way. Perhaps that was the real reason she chose to see him.

"You did not murder the Vissian Cogenitor, Commander."

"Charles," he corrected her as he choked the name out. "It's name...was Charles."

She could see a pained look on his face as he said the name. She had come to learn that the cogenitor took his name to honor him for 'enlightening' it. A fact which, no doubt, caused him even greater anguish.

T'Pol considered her next decision carefully. She was not adept at interpersonal relationships. Even by Vulcan standards she was more than a little reserved at times, but she had grown to have a healthy respect for her human crewmates. Even the erstwhile Commander Tucker whose all to human influences had become a regular subject of nightly meditations and contemplations.

T'Pol moved towards Tucker very slowly. He looked up at her peering through bleary eyes. "What do ya think yer doin’?"

T'Pol sat down on the bunk next to the chair Tucker was sprawled on. She sat straight and still as she quietly collected her thought. Taking in a deep breath she began to speak.

"I wish to tell you...a story. When I was very young, I had been assigned to the Vulcan Security Directorate..."

Trip sat forward as he tried to pull himself off the couch "I'm sure it's facinatin' T'pol, but I'm just not in the mood to...."

T'Pol extended her arm, hesitantly at first. She touched his hand gently with her own. He stopped and looked up at her in surprise. She didn't say anything. She simply looked at him. Swallowing hard he let himself fall back into the chair.

When she was certain he was not going to leave, she started again. "I was a very young and inexperienced security officer assigned to Movar III, one of the outlying travel ports under Vulcan supervision. My first week at my new post, I was assigned to investigate local merchants and traders dealing in stolen artifacts and contraband being smuggled off the planet. "

Pausing for a moment she looked down at the floor. She had not thought about these events for many years. She had forgotten how unsettling they were. "During a routine questioning, I came across a Dolik miner who was using a group of illegal Terellians to do work for him. Movar III has extensive deposit's of rare minerals, but they are very difficult to obtain do to the planet's geographical composition. The Terellians, whose home world is extremely harsh and inhospitable, were well suited for the intense heavy labor involved in Movarian mines." She looked away from Tucker as she focused on the starlight painting the far wall. "Movarian regulations require all workers to be registered to prevent exploitation by profiteers. Anyone who is found to be illegally working on Movar III will be deported and forced to return to their home world. The case was brought before the Movarian regional magistrate who ruled the Dolik miner was exploiting the Terellians by employing them in dangerous work for below the minimum payment wage. He was fined and ordered to vacate the Movarian system."

Tucker looked up at her. She had grown quiet as she continued to stare at the star Field on the wall. "What happened to the Terellians?"

Turning her head away from the wall, her gaze fell upon Tucker "They were deported and returned to their home world as stated in Movarian law. I never knew what happened to them after that. However, the mortality rate on Terel is as high as 75% in some regions. That is why Terellians make such concerted efforts to leave their home world. I had been so interested in doing what I believed was right that I never considered the ramifications. I never looked beyond stopping an injustice."

"It took me a great deal of time to accept my part in the fate that befell them. Like you, I held myself responsible and in large part...I was. However, like you my culpability was my own irresponsibility. I kept asking myself if I could take action against the Dolik miner for exploiting the Terellians. I failed to ask myself if I should. It was true...they were being exploited for the profit of another. It is equally true that the life they had made as miners was considerably more idyllic than the one I sent them back to."

"But you didn't send them back T'Pol," countered Tucker. "You wouldn't have done it if you knew what woulda happened."

"And you are no murderer, Commander. No more than I was." She replied. "We are both guilty of foolishly believing we knew what was right for another being. It is something we will each have to carry with ourselves for the rest of our lives. Don't compound the punishment by compounding your guilt in the matter."

Trip looked at the Vulcan as the tears started to fall. He didn't try to hold them back this time. The tears flowed and he leaned forward as he began to sob uncontrollably. He had wanted to cry all night and now the floodgates had opened.

T'Pol had been around humans long enough to expect extreme emotional reactions in a variety of situations. She accepted it as part of working with an emotionally charged species. However, Trip Tucker's next reaction took her by complete surprise. Intentionally or not, he had leaned his head against her shoulder. She looked at him with surprise as the hot tears soaked into her uniform. She was unaccustomed to such…intimate contact. Uncertain how to respond, she held her hands above him hesitating briefly before resting one gently on his shoulder and the other on his head. She was uncertain if this was a proper response, but when he made no attempt to push her away, she began to gently stroke his head as she had seen humans do when they comforted one another.

Tucker's tears continued to flow, but the sobs had stopped. He hugged himself tightly against the Vulcan who said nothing but continued to stroke his sandy brown hair as she watched the tears trickle down. She knew humans cried for many reasons. Not least of which was to rid themselves of inner turmoil. She had never cried for her actions with the Terellians. In truth, she did not believe she knew how, but as she watched Tucker's tears roll down his cheek she hoped that they gave him the release he needed and that perhaps… he cried some of those tears on her behalf.

The End

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Four of you have made comments

Daaaaaamn! Fantastic! I love T'Pol comforting Trip. It's so out of her realm, yet she wants to be there. Lovely!

I loved this. I very much liked the way T'Pol helped Trip not by forcing him to open up to her or discuss what had happened but by giving him an insight into her own fallibility. Beautifully written and just *perfect*. Thank you! Ali D :~)

Very very well done. Such a fitting tale to tell. A nice coda to this powerful episode.

Going to have to read this again after my tears stop.

Thank you for writing and sharing,

Tracy

Very well-done! It's nice to see how T'Pol tries to comfort him even though she's a bit out of her league. It's a refreshingly heartwarming story.