Supernova- Ch. 2

Supernova

By Samantha Quinn

RATING: eh..to be on the safe side, PG-13, angst
ARCHIVE: If you want it, take it. Be nice if you let me know, though.
Disclaimers in Chapter 1

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Chapter Two

"I'll be fine, Hoshi," I tell the beautiful woman standing in front of me.

"Don't lie to me, Trip Tucker. I'm in on your little secret, remember?" Hoshi scolds me in reply. "Are you sure you don't want some company?" she asks, wrapping her arms seductively around my waist.

"No thanks, darlin'," I reply, stepping out of her embrace.

Hoshi gives me a skeptical glance. "What are you going to do? Sit here and count the hours she has left on the ship?"

"Well, right now we're at nine and a half," I retort, a little nastier than I had intended.

"Fine, fine. I can take a hint, Malcolm," Hoshi replies and stalks out of my quarters. Since when am I in the same league of distaste as Malcolm Reed? Great, now I've pissed off Hoshi. Sadly, I think some part of me should care but I just don't have any energy left to do so.

Yep, that's exactly how I feel. Completely zapped of any energy.

'Sides, if I had let Hoshi stay, that would only remind me of T'Pol. And what I definitely was never going to have the chance to be able to do. Ever.

I have grown to accept the fact that I was never going to have with T'Pol what I really wanted. I accept the fact that she doesn't want me the way I want her.

But I was content with her friendship. Now, she's takin' even that away from me.

**If your friendship is as deep as the ocean, why have you increased the usage of the term "Sub-Commander?"**

Where'd that memory come from? And just what the hell was with that whole line of questioning this morning? She has the nerve to question my friendship? At least if I were going to leave the ship, I'd tell her. And not just casually, in front of the rest of the crew, as though she wasn't any more special than the rest of 'em.

I thought about goin' to ask her why she didn't tell me. But what right do I have to do that? None.

Because after all, it turns out she isn't really my friend. That even what I was ready and willin' to settle for, was more than she was willin' to give.

**Whoever the hell just rang my door is just gonna have to accept the fact that I'm not in any type of mood for visitors. **
I am prepared, physically, to depart the vessel. The sparse amount of clothing I brought has been packed along with my personal items. My quarters are efficiently empty.

Except for the book.

The text is the book given to me by Commander Tucker. Friendship Stories and Quotes. In researching Valentine's Day, I discovered that an exchange of presents frequently accompanies the celebration. Perhaps that is what Ensign Sato referred to when she mentioned chocolate.

Chocolate does produce in humans the same hormones as those that are emitted during intercourse.

Only fitting she shall receive chocolate from my Commander Tucker, is it not?

As I have no chocolate to give, I shall be leaving the book for Commander Tucker. He will not realize the full impact of the realization. Indeed, no one on the ship will.

Being that Vulcans value controlling their emotions, we do not frequently express love verbally. We do, however, share gifts-although on much less frequent occasions than humans. To show one's affection for another, it is appropriate to give back to them the same gift. In other words, "I appreciate you equally."

On Vulcan, it is only appropriate to engage in such an activity with your t'hy'la.

Commander Tucker will not know this. This is fortunate, as I do not share the same affection towards Commander Tucker as he shares for me. I hold a much deeper appreciation.

On Vulcan, it would be scandalous. Here, I can hide behind the guise of friendship.

As I have for the past two years.

To wrap the book, I have salvaged silk material from my most treasured night garment. It is red-the color of human passion, the color of my commander's blood, the color of all that is forbidden to me. The very symbol of all I will leave behind.

The door chimes, breaking my reverie. I am not in the mood for visitors. Still, as I will be leaving in eight point nine hours, it would be considered rude not to greet the caller.

"Come," I say, granting them permission and willing the image of Commander Tucker out of my head. *** A/N: That's all for now. Please r/r. Helps to feed the muse.

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