A Matter of Choice

A Matter of Choice

By The Watch Stander

Rating: PG
Drama/Friendship
Disclaimer: Paramount Owns Enterprise and all of its crew. The wonderful interpretation of these characters is owned by the cast of Enterprise. The fun of writing this story about these characters is owned by me and is no way intended to infringe on any of these rights and is done without payment or profit on my part
Summary: The senior officers of Enterprise reflect on the consequences of Sim’s sacrifice.
Spoilers for “Similitude.”

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Part 1

Sim was once again sitting in Tucker’s quarters. He looked around the neat room and sensed Trip’s presence everywhere. It was only after the captain had left that he found the picture of Trip & Archer posed in a picture together. Sim knew they were friends, but seeing the picture confirmed it. Next to it was a picture of Trip’s sister Lizzie and the realization that she was dead brought an ache into his heart, for in many ways she was his sister too.

Putting the pictures back on the shelf, he wondered what he was going to do. Archer had said it was up to him, but you could see the desperation in those intense green eyes of his and Sim knew the Captain was backed into a corner.

If he let Sim live then his friend Trip died. Only to be followed a few days later by Sim, so in reality he really lost twice. Two people instead of just one, it presented a dilemma no doubt.

Somehow, he found himself actually feeling sorry for Archer.

Especially since I have most of Trip’s memories and Archer was Trip’s best friend.

There were a lot of fond memories of Archer for the Captain had spent the last ten years being a friend to the engineer. He had also saved Trip’s life twice, so it was no real surprise that Archer would be so desperate to do it once again.

The Captain was also not someone who made friends easily and he had proven that by keeping Sim at arms distance so as not to become conflicted in his purpose. The closeness Archer shared with Trip was as if they were brothers, not just best friends. Losing Trip would probably break his heart.

I really wouldn’t want to be in his shoes.

How does she feel about me, or is it Trip that she thinks about? Wish I knew her better, for I envy Trip the closeness that they shared.

He sat there for a long time, trying to decide what to do. Maybe running away was the answer; no one would need to make a decision that way. There would be no guilt on the Captain’s part and Phlox would be spared as well, for the Doctor too had shown his empathy in what Sim was going through. All these people were part of his life now as well as Trip’s and he wanted to spare them any more pain. It sounded noble, but it was true. The natural order of things would take place, Trip would die and so would he, but it wouldn’t be the fault of others. They could blame him.

It would make things so much easier.

**************************

Phlox was standing in the shadows of sickbay when the Captain came in and stood beside Commander Tucker’s bedside. Phlox walked away quietly to the back office where he wouldn’t disturb Archer, for he knew why the Captain was here.

I gave him this choice, but at the time, I felt it was the right thing to do to save Commander Tucker’s life. He is such an integral part of this crew and the Captain needs him now more than ever.

For the past few months Phlox had watched as Archer slowly evolved into the hardened man that was in the other room. Phlox had also seen the effect of that on the Captain’s and Commander Tucker’s friendship. Archer’s focus on the mission had eaten away at him and taken away most of the closeness that the two men shared.

The Captain Archer they were left with now was a ruthless and driven man, obsessed with finding the Xindi and their weapon at any cost. This left Commander Tucker on his own to find an end to his grief over the death of his sister. Fortunately, Lt Reed had stepped in to take Archer’s place and befriended the engineer. T’Pol had also proven willing to come to the Commander’s aid and had helped immensely. With their help, Commander Tucker was able to contain most of his hatred and begin to function almost normally. He was once again part of the crew, but no longer the Captain’s best friend. Archer had pushed him aside and treated him as just another officer.

Phlox had found this development most disturbing. For the Captain to isolate himself like this was not healthy. He needed a friend and confidant and Trip was that friend. There was no way the Doctor would stand by and allow Commander Tucker to die and therefore condemn the Captain to a life devoid of that close friendship. Even though Archer wouldn’t admit it, he needed Commander Tucker and not just as an engineer, he needed his friend. Just like they all needed the amiable man back as part of the crew on this mission. A mission that Phlox referred to as The Mission to Hell.

Therefore, he sat here with his own thoughts, waiting for Captain Archer to make up his mind as to what he would do. There was nothing more Phlox could do. Both Archer and Sim would have to decide what they each wanted and what sacrifice each would make.

Commander Tucker’s life is literally in their hands.

***********************

Archer stood by Trip’s bedside in sickbay. He looked at Trip lying there so still with his face pale and ghostly, put in this position because of a freak accident not of his making. The test would have run perfectly if it hadn’t been for the anomalies they had run into. Once more Jon cursed this part of space as he realized if they hadn’t come here, Trip wouldn’t be dying.

And I wouldn’t have to make this decision to sacrifice someone else to save him.

Saving Trip would mean the sacrifice of someone who looked like Trip, acted like Trip and in many ways was Trip. But Archer knew Sim wasn’t Trip and he wanted his friend back not a copy or a substitute.

It sounded so selfish, but it was tearing Archer apart. So much of him wanted Trip back, but the other part knew the price that having him back would cost.

A part of Archer’s very soul.

I feel so disloyal! Trip would do anything for me and has proven that, but what am I willing to do to save him?

And so he stood there looking down at his best friend, wondering which part of him would win this battle and what it would cost him in the end.

Which part of my soul am I willing to give up.

*************************

T’Pol was in her quarters meditating, trying to decide how she would deal with what Sim had told her about his feelings for her. However, what had disturbed her most was that Sim wasn’t sure if those feelings were his or Commander Tucker’s.

Never would she ever have thought that she and the emotional and unpredictable Commander would develop a friendship, never mind a possible romantic involvement. They had discussed the gossip about their sessions of course, but that was just to clear the air so they both were aware of the gossip and its implications.

A romantic involvement with the Commander was something she had not anticipated, but Sim had revealed those feelings to her, standing before her the image of Commander Tucker at a young age. Completely honest in his innocence and not having the maturity to know what things he should say and not say.

She wondered at what age Commander Tucker had learned to hide his feelings. Possibly when he failed in one or more of the relationships he had mentioned to her. He must have learned to hide his true feelings and just tease people never letting them know how he really felt. It was a part of the human makeup she didn’t understand.

Vulcans were always honest and said exactly what they thought,

Or did they?

Suddenly, she realized that even she hid things inside not wanting to be hurt as well.

It was a question that needed an answer, but she might never get that answer if Commander Tucker didn’t live. That thought unto itself disturbed her and she had been trying to push it out of her mind since the day Captain Archer had told her the Commander might not live. The shock she had felt when he told her went unnoticed by the Captain since he also seemed to be absorbed in his own agony over the possible death of his friend.

He had assigned her to oversee the repairs and she had spent days working in engineering trying to keep busy and not allow herself to think of a certain human with deep blue eyes that always brightened when he teased her.

I miss him.

It was the first honest thing she had admitted to herself in a very long time. Now that she had admitted it, the thought was acceptable.
The Commander was someone that she cared about. Their sessions together had brought him closer to her than anyone that she had ever known. He had become part of her world and that world would be a lot lonelier without him.

If Commander Tucker died, he would be taking a piece of her with him.

And I don’t know what I will do without him.....

********************

Continue to Part 2

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A handful of people have made comments

Nicely done. It is a concise self-contained multiple POV piece of fiction. It does not require further chapters..... but the Trip'T'Poler in me respectfully requests MORE!!

nice job. this is some excellent writing, PLEASe continue!!!
~Sara~

Thank you. I've been thinking about what must of been going through their minds at that time.....

Loved this, beautifully handled especially T'Pol. Now all I need to do is be able to see Season 3! Thanks for an excellent story, Ali D :~)

Thank you all for your reviews. If you want I can continue on this, but there are so many already written it may be redundant. The stories I've read so far are excellent!
Thanks again