Resolutions

Resolutions

by The Watch Stander

Genre: Angst
Rating: PG

Disclaimer: Characters and series belong to Paramount

~~~~

Trip made his way down the corridor of E deck whistling happily to himself. He was glad they were safely docked at the refit space station above Earth, for in two days time he would actually be back on Earth. It really felt good to be almost home.

With the help of Daniels they had found Captain Archer and managed to come out of the time warp successfully, as well as save Earth from destruction.

Everything was being done to bring things back to normal. Trip's engineering team was busily working with the refit crew to repair Enterprise and bring her back to what she once was with a few added extras that he had suggested. Lt Reed also had his say and other weapons were being added as well.

Trip planned on treating his Engineering team, as well as Jon and his fellow officers to a drink at the Six 02 Club on Earth. However, he also wanted to be sure TPol would come as well and not feel left out.

As he headed down the hall to her quarters, he went over in his head what he would actually say to her. Somehow he hoped what he'd planned to tell her came out all right and didn't make him sound like an idiot. TPol had been very distant as of late and he had a tough time reading her.

She seems almost, ... preoccupied.

When he arrived at her quarters, he stood for a moment before the door to compose himself.

We've both been through a lot on this mission. If it hadn't been for her taking the time to help me sleep by giving me neuropressure treatments, I might not have made it back in one piece, physically or mentally

He felt that he owed her a lot and was becoming emotionally attached to her as well. Even though she had brushed their night together off as an experiment, Trip still hoped there would be more to it than that.

Anyhow, he was willing to try and reestablish the closeness they had once shared.

He rang the buzzer and after hearing a muffled 'enter', went inside. TPol was standing by her bed busily folding items of clothing and putting them in her travel bag. She looked up as he entered.

"Commander?"

With TPol, his title was always used as a question as well as a greeting. Time was not wasted that way. In the three years they had worked together she had only once called him Trip.

Seeing her standing there packing made him feel very foolish, for she was obviously planning to leave with them and go to Eart******>

He smiled to himself as he tried to sound nonchalant, "Just thought I'd stop by and remind you that I'm buying at the Six 02 Club when we get back to Earth. "

She looked at him with a slight hint of surprise on her face, then it was gone. It was replaced by a Vulcan look of reserve that he remembered so well, from the time before they had entered the Expanse.

"I'm sorry, Commander, but I won't be able to join you. Perhaps, ... another time," she added as she folded another item and placed it in the travel bag.

Surprised by her answer, he stammered, "Aren't you coming with us to Earth?"

She looked up at him once more as if deciding what to say her face still so unreadable.

"No. My parents have asked that I come back to Vulcan for they wish to see me and I want to see them as well. While I'm there, I plan to visit with some of my colleagues that I went to University with." She said it matter of fact, but it came out rather cold and distant.

This wasn't the T'Pol he wanted to talk with. She seemed so cold and defensive.

Trip really didn't know what to say. This wasn't going the way he had anticipated at all. Once back on earth he had planned on taking her to dinner and well, just talking. Maybe regain some of the closeness they had shared on this mission that had somehow managed to slowly dissipate over the past weeks.

That entire plan had just gone down the drain.

"I see, " He looked down at his feet, at a loss for words.

Maybe we can talk before she leaves.

He looked up hopefully, " Well, I kinda hoped that you and I could spend some time together and maybe have . . . dinner?"

Realizing what was being inferred, she stopped folding her clothes. "I'm afraid I leave in two hours time. A Vulcan transport has agreed to take me and there won't be another for three weeks."

Once said she wondered if this had hurt his feelings, but knew she couldn't let him sway her from this decision. Seeing the look of disappointment on his face she tried to soften the blow to both his feelings and his ego.

"When I return, we could . . . talk." Her features seemed to soften as she said it.

Hearing this Trip looked relieved, his hopes renewed. "Yeah, I'd like that. You could tell me about Vulcan and your visit when you get back."

Once more he smiled, thinking that everything would be all right after all.

"I hope you have a great time and get lots of rest. You've been very distant lately and it's probably from all the stress we've been under."

TPol looked at the kind face of the man before her, his blue eyes reflecting the sincerity of what he had just said. She was once more aware of how emotional he could be and how thoughtful as well, for he had come here to invite her to his party and include her with his friends.

However, she needed this break from Enterprise, and its crew. Their emotions were overwhelming her and she still had to learn to deal with her own newly exaggerated emotions as well. The Doctor had told her she might have to readdress that problem and learn new controls in how to deal with them. It was another reason she needed to go back to Vulcan. Only there would she find the peace she needed to meditate properly and obtain the help she so badly needed.

She also knew that she had treated this man before her unfairly, and in a way had used him as well. It wasn't that she didn't like him, for she did. He was kind and considerate and had a wealth of emotions that he kept hidden from almost everyone. However, their affair had been a passionate encounter of one night and afterwards she realized that it had been a mistake.

There had been a reason for this uncontrolled behavior, for she had been under the influence of trillium causing her to lose control of her emotions and driving her mad with desire for him. If she had been in her right mind, it never would have happened.

At least, not that quickly.

After that night she tried to avoid him, but the Commander was persistent as well as compassionate. He wouldn't drop it that easily and continued to try and see her.

Realizing that she needed help to escape the effects of the drug, she had finally turned to Dr. Phlox for help. It was fortunate in that he had been most discreet and had weaned her off the drug over the following weeks without anyone finding out. Commander Tucker never knew, but he must have guessed something wasn't right for she had continually avoided him.

It was now time for her to go home, back to Vulcan to cleanse her soul of the unchecked emotions and passion that she had unleashed by using the drug.

"I will do that and I hope to return to Enterprise more rested and once more able to attend to my duties, Commander."

Trip smiled as he looked closely at her. She looked exhausted and probably needed the time alone. He wouldn't begrudge her that. She had earned it.

"All right then, I'll see you when you get back and we can talk over dinner." He headed for the door.

TPol nodded in agreement, then Trip left quickly. She watched the door close and surmised that he must have been embarrassed and wanted to leave gracefully.

Commander Tucker didn't deserve to be treated this way and she needed time away to sort out her true feelings for him. If they were indeed real then she would know and return more in control and able to deal with these emotions and new feelings. Right now that wasn't possible. His close proximity wasn't helping her address the problem. She needed to know what was real and what was imagined.

Once more she started to pack, trying to tell herself that soon she would be back on Vulcan and able to meditate properly. There her restless soul and emotions could be at peace once more.

*****************************************

As Trip slowly walked down the corridor toward his own quarters, he wondered about how everything would finally turn out. It was so emotionally draining. All the months of stress, attacks, betrayals and deaths. The accumulative effect had taken its toll on everyone on the ship and TPol was no exception. He realized that everyone needed a little space and time alone and hopefully when TPol returned from Vulcan they would be able to once more renew their relationship.

A relationship that had been stormy at times when the Captain was lost and he had to practically restrain her from doing something foolish and getting herself killed. But, there was also the time that she had been very supportive when he finally broke down over the loss of his sister.

For now though, he would have to go on with his own plans for his return to earth. There were relatives to visit and call and of course his own family members to see. All of this ran through his mind as he walked away.

Just have to get through it all one day at a time.

***************************

Trip met Archer for dinner two weeks later at the Captain's Table. Archer had practically ordered him to come for Trip was burying himself in engineering since coming back from his leave on Earth. Trip hadn't been happy about Jon forcing him to come to dinner, but finally agreed. There was so much to do and he felt that his time right now would be better spent in repairing Enterprise. The ship still needed massive repairs and the engineer wasn't one to watch others work and not help.

As he entered the Captain's mess, his freshly washed hair dripped down his neck onto his clean uniform reminding him that he had forgotten to dry it in his rush to get here on time. Archer was already in the room staring out the viewport at the stars.

"Capt'n"

Archer slowly turned, a welcoming smile on his face, "Glad to see you could make it, Trip."

Trip smiled back sheepishly, "Ya, didn't give me much choice."

Archer smiled again, his best friend could be so stubborn at times.

"It'll do you good to get away from engineering for a while."

Trip nodded in acceptance.

Archer walked over to the table and started to sit down. Trip by habit automatically sat to his right even though he could have sat at the other end of the table since TPol was still on leave.

Archer signaled to Chef who stood at the galley door. The man nodded then went to prepare the dinners for the two officers.

Trip observed the exchange and looked at Archer quizzically.

"I took the liberty of ordering for you. Hope you don't mind?" Archer offered as way of explanation.

"Not at all Capt'n. I'm so tired, that I'm not sure I could make a decision on what to eat."

Archer again noted how exhausted Trip looked, especially since coming off leave two weeks ago and going right back to work in Engineering.

"How are the repairs coming?", he finally asked.

Trip leaned back, "Well, most of the heavy work is being done by the station personnel, but my crew is doing the minor repairs so that things could progress faster. All that little stuff is time consuming and our doing it frees up their crew to do the really heavy repairs we can't handle."

A sudden smile lit up Trip's face, "Hell, I even have Malcolm working!"

Archer laughed, "I wondered where he was. I knew he only took a short leave and then came right back to the ship."

Trip looked sheepish, " I think I'm kinda to blame for that, Capt'n. He and I went out for a night on the town and Malcolm over indulged in spirits, you might say."

Archer smiled as the picture of a drunken Reed came to mind.

The steward suddenly appeared with a bottle of wine and two glasses which he placed on the table in front of the Captain.

Archer filled the two glasses half full of wine and handed one to Trip. They both raised their glasses, for a toast.

Trip went first, "Here's to Enterprise, may she be back in one piece very soon so we can get on with our mission!"

Archer drank, then added, "And here's to her crew who is the best there is!"

The steward appeared again, this time with Caesar's salads that Archer knew Trip liked.

Trip's eyes lit up when he saw them. "Good choice, Capt'n!"

Archer just nodded as his mouth was now full of salad greens.

Trip tried his as well, then leaned back in the seat as he savored the flavor, "I plumb forgot what a Caesar's salad tasted like."

Archer looked over at his friend, "Well, maybe if you came out of the pits of Engineering more often, you'd remember."

Trip shook his head, "No can do, Capt'n, if Enterprise is ever going to move again this work needs to be done. By the way, have you heard anything from TPol? I could sure use her help down in engineering."

Archer looked closely at his Chief Engineer trying to gauge what his reaction might be to what he had to say next. He knew the two were close and there had been rumors of a relationship as well.

"Yes, she'll be back on board in two days time."

Trip looked up from his salad. "That's good news, I'll put her to work with Rostov, they can fix the relays to the engines' control panel."

He tried not to show it, but Trip was glad that she was finally coming back. For a while he had thought she might not return. That somehow the Vulcan embassy would refuse to let her.

Soval must be turning green, he thought with great glee.

The prime rib arrived and Trip's eyes really widened as the thick piece of meat was placed before him.

"This is great, Capt'n! You really know how to make your Chief Engineer happy!"

Archer again smiled, but added seriously, "I'd like to think that it's my friend that I'm making happy."

Startled by the remark, Trip blushed, now embarrassed, "Aw hell, Jon! You know what I meant."

Jon reached over and patted the younger man on the arm.

" I know. I just like to let you know how much I appreciate your being on Enterprise. "

Archer didn't add that he considered Trip his younger brother for fear of further embarrassing him.

Trip nodded and started in on the prime rib. As they ate, they discussed the different personnel replacements they had been sent and where they would be assigned. Later, over a glass of port wine, they talked about old times. The hours flew by and Trip found himself starting to nod off, so he excused himself.

As he walked back to his cabin, he thought about TPol. The wine had mellowed him and thoughts of her beautiful face with its elf like features came to mind. He vividly remembered their night together and once more he longed for her touch that sent shivers throughout his body. It had been a passionate night that they had spent together and once more he wished that it could happen again.

Once back in his quarters and in bed he drifted off with those same thoughts still foremost in his mind. The dream that came was of passionate embraces and warm kisses by that same beautiful face. It all came back to him, the feelings of warmth and joy that he had experienced that night knowing that she had chosen him to make love to and not someone else. After the months of fear and anger it had renewed his soul and made him whole again. Allowing him to come back to normal and be himself. Remembering that night of passion he slumbered contentedly as the dream went on and he was lost once more in her arms.

When he awoke the next day he was exhausted and it took an extra long shower just to get the cobwebs out of his head. After dressing he made his way to the mess where he ran into Malcolm Reed.

"You look like the very devil! Haven't you slept?" Reed Inquired.

Malcolm always is one to say exactly what he thinks and this morning is no exception.

"Thanks, Malcolm for that observation, and yes, I did get a full night's sleep."

"Well, guess you must need coffee then," Malcolm smiled knowingly.

"I need an ocean of coffee! My eyes are still not open."

Trip left it at that as they both got a cup of coffee and sat down at a table in the back. Malcolm always seemed to want to chat in the morning, something Trip could never figure out. Usually Malcolm was a man of few words.

"So, what's this I hear about TPol returning?", Malcolm asked.

That piqued Trip's interest and his eyes opened a little wider as he remembered that she would arrive in just 24 hours. He almost smiled, but held back, realizing Malcolm wouldn't let that pass without a comment or question.

"Capt'n told me she will be back tomorrow. Could certainly use her help." He said it casually hoping Malcolm wouldn't delve any deeper and ask questions. Trip really didn't want to lie to him.

The Lt seemed to accept it for what it was,"Good. Now maybe I can go back to the Armory and work there?"

Trip was glad the subject was changed. "Of course, and I just want to say you've done a great job."

Malcolm smiled as he sipped his coffee. He wanted to ask more about TPol, but sensed that Trip was uncomfortable and had immediately changed the subject.

"Well, I guess you've got me for one more day then, but tomorrow, I have to get back to the Armory and see what new weapons they've put in for us."

Trip smiled, "Don't worry, I'm sure there's something there that will make a big explosion and make you happy!"

Malcolm looked offended, "Just the same, I want to see it!"

Trip smirked, it was so easy to get the limey's goat. "All right! When TPol is back, I'll release you."

Malcolm nodded, then smiled happily as they both got up and headed for Engineering.

*********************************

The 24 hours went by quickly and Trip once more found himself on his way down the corridor to T'Pol's quarters. It was after his shift and he had gone to his own quarters first to have a shower and change into a clean uniform.

When he arrived at her door, he took a deep breath and pushed the chime. This time TPol greeted him at the door and let him in. She was wearing a peach color robe of some silken material and she looked....different, more rested. He was glad to see the change, for the bags under her eyes that had shown her exhaustion were gone.

"Commander." She stood aside and let him come in.

"Just thought I'd drop by and welcome you back." He tried to make it sound nonchalant.

"Please, have a seat," she pointed to a cushion in front of her meditation candle.

Trip nodded and went to sit down. TPol found another cushion and positioned it across from the Commander so they could talk face to face.

The soft glow of the candle reflected off their features making the room both intimate and setting a mood that suited Trip. In this light she seemed even more beautiful than even he remembered.

TPol looked at him expectantly, letting him be the first to speak.

"So, how was your visit?" He smiled pleasantly as he waited for her to begin.

TPol looked closely at him and tried to decide where to start and just what to say.

"As you know, I went to Vulcan to see my parents as well as visit old friends. I also went there to explain to them why I broke my engagement to Koss. My parents never knew why I had done it and I owed them an explanation. When I told them why my parents understood and gave me back the right to choose my own mate."

Trip's eyes lit up at that statement. He would let her finish her story, then ask her about the possibility of renewing their relationship.

Her voice was soft as she went on talking about her visit.

" When I was a little girl, I had a friend, who I played with and became very attached to, for he treated me like his sister. He was more than a brother though, he was also my greatest friend and supporter, encouraging me to do great things just as he wanted to do. We both went to the same school and eventually the same University. "

Her tone softened and reflected a hint of sadness, " However, just as we were becoming of age and entering the University, my parents announced my engagement to Koss. It was settled that when it was time for me to bond, it would be with Koss and our families would thus be joined. My parents were very happy with the match and I could do nothing to stop it. In my family, bond mates are arranged by the parents.

When my friend found out, he was upset as he felt that I should have had a choice as to what I would do with my life. Eventually we went our separate ways as one must, since I was already promised and there was nothing either of us could do. We lost touch with each other and last I heard he was with the Diplomatic Corp on a distant assignment."

Again her voice changed to a lighter tone.

"While I was visiting on Vulcan I went to a gathering of past University graduates in hopes of finding some of my ex_classmates. I wasn't disappointed, as I found many of them there. "

Her eyes shown softly and Trip could have sworn that she just might smile.

"I also met my childhood friend there once again and we became reacquainted." Her voice suddenly took on more animation, " There were so many things to talk about, that I ended up spending the entire time with him just talking about mutual accomplishments and other interests that we have in common."

She looked across at him and added softly,"I told him about Enterprise and all the people from Earth I'd come to know. He wants to meet all of you, so I invited him to meet us here next week."

At first Trip was taken back by this, but then realized that she too must have friends.

After all, he is her childhood friend and probably curious about all of us. It would also be nice to meet him since he means so much to her. I have to get to know people that she likes if we're going to be together.

He smiled, "Of, course. Captain Archer will probably be thrilled to show him the ship."

TPol seemed almost relieved at hearing this from him. " I also want all of you to meet him, as he is my new husband."

Trip's whole world fell apart at that moment. Everything inside him screamed,

this can't be!

Inside his chest his heart started to pound so hard it made him feel faint. His face must have shown it for TPol seemed to be watching him closely.

Finally, he somehow found his voice.

"Your new husband? As in you're ...married?" It sounded so pathetic, almost pleading with her to say that it wasn't true.

TPol had expected a reaction, but was somewhat taken back by this much of an emotional response from the Commander. However, she chose to continue, for it was better that she explain it than have him told by someone else.

"Yes. We had the bonding ceremony on Vulcan as it was past the time that I should take a mate. I had been delaying it while we were in the Expanse on our mission."

She went on, "His name is Velsaris and he is a scientist as well as a diplomat with the Vulcan Diplomatic Corp."

Knowing the Commander was upset, she paused a moment then said," I hope you will all welcome him."

Trip sat there, feeling shattered and betrayed. All this time he had thought about nothing else, but renewing their relationship that had been started months ago.

She's married now and there's nothing I can do.

Even though his heart was broken, he envied her this happiness, for now he had none. There was no one left for him to turn to. Even his friendship with Amanda Cole had cooled once TPol had entered the picture.

Taking a deep breath he gathered up what little courage he had left and tried to say the right thing.

"I'm glad for you, TPol. You deserve to be happy," He couldn't keep the sadness out of his voice or the unhappy expression off his face, but he put as much sincerity into the statement as he possibly could. It wasn't a lie, but rather a half truth for his whole world was dissolving around him.

"I appreciate that, Commander." It was said softly for she could see he was taking this badly.

He took a deep breath. Somehow he would survive this, but now he really needed to leave before he fell apart and made a fool of himself in front of her. It would take a monumental effort on his part to try and leave gracefully.

"It's getting late and I really need to get some sleep. I'll.... see you tomorrow." He even sounded tired as all his emotions were being drained at once leaving him exhausted. Inside his chest, his heart pounded so hard that it was painful.

"Of course, Commander." She knew he was upset, but there was nothing she could do right now to help him. Later when the emotional shock passed they could talk.

TPol showed him out and when the door closed he leaned back against the wall outside her door. As he stood there his eyes filled, but he didn't wipe away the tears, instead he pushed himself away from the wall and blindly tried to make his way down the corridor to his quarters before someone saw him.

It was going to be a long night, and he wasn't sure how he would ever get through it......

End

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A whole mess of folks have made comments

oh god, heartbreak! i think you may be evil. good story, though.

T'pol meets some childhood friend and after one day marries him.?? So much for going away to sort out her feelings for Trip, I guess she didn't have any if she could marry someone else that quickly , and to casually mention that she was now married when she knew how Trip felt about her. Arrrrgh. Poor Trip, I think he should go back to Amanda.

Great story, but quite sad. You've got to feel sorry for Trip. I guess if T'Pol was happy to marry an old friend on Vulcan after only a few weeks, it was for the best that Trip and T'Pol didn't get together. The final scene did seem a bit callous, but it was a very dramatic twist!

wow, great story, how could she choose anyone else ? Unbelievable.

UGH! How heart wretching! Poor Trip! It's one of those stories that you can both hate and love at the same time--as it does a great job in evoking feelings from it's readers! Good job!
But I will say this!! I hope that your version of this sad parting would forever remain here in fan fiction and would never be protrayed on the show during season 4 and beyond!!! I don't think my wee little heart could stand it!

It's a well constructed story, but you're going straight to hell!! (Just kidding). It really is a different take on the T/T story line. It's a powerful theme and made me realize how connected I (and probably lots of readers here) am to T/T. A great job and keep up the good work. But, Paramount better not run with this one.

Good story but I have to say, if I've known I probably wouldn't have read it... Arrrgggghhh! I feel like I want to hit her with something hard!

So sad. You made me cry. I hope this is not what will happen, but judging by Jolene's coments in SciFi Weekly, she's not interested in the relationship happening. Who knows?

This seems such a quick turn around for T'Pol I have to wonder whether or not more happened on Vulcan than she is telling. Perhaps her parents persuaded her to undergo the Kohlinar and that left her feelings for Trip set aside so she could then make a 'logical match' with her old childhood friend? At least that's what I hope. I would hate to think T'Pol so fickle in her affections that she could do this otherwise. Good story - but my heart breaks for Trip. Ali D :~)

Wow, this is sad, poor Trip. Although T'Pol is ma fav. when she told trip she married Mr.V I wanted to strangle her. How could she do that to Trip? Then as she explained their relationship I was somewhat happy for her. But poor , poor Trip. And this part was a big toug on my heart "...he envied her this happiness, for now he had none. There was no one left for him to turn to." Good story...just so sad.

it wasnt just what she did in marrying someone else; it was in how she went about telling him
that sounded so suprising and cold hearted.
she just chatted and chatted in an "animated " tone about her wonderful friend and then just sprang the suprise on trip.

vulcans do have empathy by the way even though very little of it was on display here.

i hope if tpol were to get married to someone in her past she had been fond of she would have handled this better then how she came across..
like an eighteen year old who run off and married a summer crush.

instead chatting away about how exited she had been to meet her old friend she should have told him first and gave him a chance to talk.

it is so suprising that the empathy tpol had in forgotten through zero hour vanished so fast.

I cant believe that! T'pol goes home to sort out her feeling for Trip, meets an old friend and for gets to even consider her feelings for Trip! I hatted this story so much I hope you write a secound part to sort this mess out!Please I cant stand this type of story ending like that!

So sad. Good story though, and well written.

No, this was quite a bit off... even if we didn't know that he goes with her to Vulcan, the way T'Pol acted was out of character. I understand the need to get back to her roots so I get the marriage, but the way she treated Trip was very callous.

This is a very different take on T/T. There's not even really any angst, because your T'Pol doesn't feel anything for Trip. It's just the story of their breakup.

Huh? I hope Trip is having a nightmare. She wants to resolve her feelings, but goes off and marries someone else within a few days?