A Different Kind of Communication - Part V

A Different Kind of Communication

By: TLR

Rated: PG-13 Mild adult content.
Disclaimer” Enterprise is the property of UPN and Paramount Productions.
Summary: This story picks up where Part 4 ended. To this point Trip had seen memories that spanned T'Pol's entire life. In her later memories, Trip noticed his presence was heavy in them. At last look, he was now seeing the true impact of her mother's death and wishing he'd been there to help. Let's get back to the show.

April 14, 2005

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Part V

Final Chapter

Trip's heart was aching, much like it had after his loss of Lizzie. He knew all too well the devastating affects of losing one so close. His hand continued to stroke lovingly at the sleeping Vulcan's back. He wanted so desperately to pull her into his arms and never let go. The room around him flickered once more and Trip looked up to find a very sullen T'Pol sitting in her quarters at her desk.

On the view screen was a communiqué from the Vulcan High Council. Its elegant strands of writing seemed more like a work of art than a document. In T'Pol's mind Trip could hear the words translated and began to understand the young woman's torment.

(Your decision to remain behind on the human ship is quite illogical. Your place is with your people; your duty to them is expected. You bring no honor to your mother's death, or to her memory.)

T'Pol ran over and over again the letter's contents. Her thoughts reviewed the council's demands and a sick feeling grew in the pit of her stomach. She did not wish to return home nor become head of the council. Her true feelings were that of a sense of connection to her Human crewmates and Trip in particular. As if on cue, her mind played a part of a discussion T'Pol had with her mother during their time on Vulcan.

“Do you really believe that a Human and a Vulcan can have a future together? Imagine the shame your children would endure,....assuming that the two of you can have children.”

Trip's eyes grew wide never knowing of this interaction between T'Pol and her parent. He knew T'Les was aware of his feelings for her daughter, but had no idea that T'Pol had discussed their relationship with her. He wondered whether this discussion had taken place before or after his talk with the elder Vulcan, but remembered T'Les' saying that T'Pol hadn't spoken to her yet.

Suddenly the scene changed back to T'Pol holding her mother's lifeless body. The sadness ran through her again as she groped to pull her mom closer to her. Her last words, "I've always been so proud of you,.... my T'Pol." played over and over again in her mind.

(Would she still be proud of me now...... my illogically staying behind with these Humans.) Came the thought in her mind and she hung her head in disgrace. Trip then saw her thought turn to him. She was remembering his help when she first learned of Koss's family's demands. His words seemed illogical, but in a strange way they soothed her. He was reading her thoughts, and that she had no desire to return home and become the property of a man she did not know. For the first time T'Pol felt her worked meant something, and as illogical as it was, she considered putting her heritage aside to pursue it.

Again suddenly, the words of the communiqué' came back to her. The contents immediately sickened her heart and she tried desperately to change her thoughts. But every time her mind drifted back to Trip and her shipmates, the guilty feelings returned. T'Pol turned to the pad before her that contained the Kir'shara. She dove into it trying desperately to find a way to make her desires logical.

T'Pol's memories then turned to the day in sickbay. She'd just been recovering from having the Orion slave device removed from her temple. Trip came to check on her as usual, and T'Pol seemed desperate to get him to realize that her marriage was in name only. Trip could feel her need for him there, he also felt her guilt over the pleasure she felt as his hand braced her back, when the wall panel behind them exploded. Trip had grabbed T'Pol forcing her down to the floor and covering her with his own body. His arms came about her and for a brief moment she forgot about the surrounding dangers and only concentrated on his closeness. It reassured her, made much of the pain of her betrothal retreat to the far edges of her mind.

Then suddenly that memory, as sweet as it was, brought forth in T'Pol the overwhelming pain and loss of her mother's death. As if on a loop, her conversation regarding the human, her death and the communiqué played over and over every time she thought of the young engineer. This made T'Pol dig deeper and deeper into the Kir'shara to find the answers that would help her end this emotional onslaught.

Trip saw his efforts to communicate with the young Vulcan. He watched as time after time he approached her and was shot down. He felt the sadness in her knowing she had hurt him. But once again the overwhelming waves of pain and guilt returned to her. She needed to be with Trip, but his mere presence was triggering these feelings. The only solace the young Vulcan had was that Trip did love her and would wait until she found the answers she needed. With that, T'Pol dedicated every spare moment to searching for them. In her mind, she knew her ancestor had to have provided some way for her to find the logic in her actions. For she was a daughter of Surak, and being so it was unlikely she had made a wrong decision.

"It may come as a shock to you, but not everything in my life revolves around you!" Those sharp words brought Trip's mind back to the scene before him. He saw of very fragile T'Pol trying her best to maintain control as her world, or what was left of it came crashing down about her. She came to his quarters wanting to know the reason for his transfer, but instead was getting a verbal assault from the one person she thought she could count on through all this. Her heart fell limp, not moving nor wanting to. Her eyes could barely hide the shock she felt inside, as she steeled her body to stand as rigidly as possible.

Trip's heart sank. He understood why he said what he did at the time, but now realizing T'Pol was trying to find a life for them together, he wished he could take that moment back. For the woman he saw before him, was a mere shell. She left his quarters and roamed aimlessly about the passageways of the ship. Her mind and her heart were dead or dying. As she passed crewmen, she was unaware of them. She was also unaware of the tracks of tears making their way down her face. She roamed the ship for several hours that night, not attending Trip's going away party and never making it to her quarters to attempt meditation for her pain. When she finally stopped, Trip could see her curled up in a ball crammed behind the far end of a torpedo launcher. With the party, most of the security staff were off-duty and no one saw her sneak in and find her secret place in the shadows.

Trip suddenly noticed the space about him growing darker. The gray hue now dimmed to almost black, and Trip realized it was T'Pol's mood that was controlling their environment. For the first time Trip could feel the sadness he caused in her and once more his eyes grew full of tears.

(How could I have done that to her?...... How could I've been so selfish?) He mentally chastise himself over and over again. Suddenly all the pain of rejection seemed pale compared to what this young woman was suffering. Trip wished T'Pol had explained this to him months ago. Maybe he could have learned to give her the time she needed, but knew it would've been hard forcibly staying away from her. Trip was unsure what her status was now. Had she found the logic she needed, or was his presence still so painful for her. Trip decided he needed to know more about what was going on. (How did he know of these things? What was this place......?) Trip decided from now on to let T'Pol set the limits to their relationship until he could better gage her needs.

*** Trip looked down at T'Pol who was just now starting to stir on his lap. He watched her with great interest as slowly her eyes began to open. Within moments she became conscious and looked back at him in wonder as she gradually rose to a sitting position.

“What is this place? How are we here?” Trip asked her, and watched as her eyes lowered to the floor. Trip felt a mixture of sadness and shame come at him from her.

“We are in my mind.” She murmured somewhat embarrassed by his realization.

”How did I get here?” He looked around, “How is this possible?” Trip looked back at T'Pol. He waited for her answer calmly and reassuringly.

“We have some how formed a bond between us.” She stated. “Our souls are joined together.”

“So we are in your mind?” Trip was intrigued and amazed by that thought, even though he had already suspected as much.

“That still doesn't explain how I got here.” T'Pol looked back into his face. She steeled her nerves and began to explain to the young engineer what it was between them.

“Your mind has sought mine. It happens when you concentrate on me. If I'm awake I am able to block your thoughts but when I am asleep or meditating I am less able to resist your mind’s intrusion.” T'Pol made her explanation sound so clinical. Trip wondered if she truly disliked this interaction. He feared for a moment that he was causing the pain in her again, but didn't get a sense of it as he had before... (Was she blocking it from me now?) He decided to ask her directly, that he needed to know.

“So you're saying that I am bothering you in this way?” T'Pol simply shook her head.

“I am not bothered by this. I simply knew you were not aware of it. I felt you might be embarrassed by your interactions with me during this time. It was unfair to you to allow it to go on without explaining it first.”

“Is that what you have been trying to talk to me about, your questions about my dreams and all?” T'Pol simply nodded.

“Well if you wanted to talk to me about it, then why do you keep telling me to go way when we meet like this?” Trip again suspected the pain.

“I was in need of meditation to steady my controls. I have not slept well nor meditated in quite awhile. I wished to have my control improved before we spoke.” T'Pol looked once more to the floor.

“How long have you known about this?” Trip took her face in his hand and turned it back to meet his. He wondered if she'd been aware of it when they were together on Vulcan. If she had, than why wasn't she aware of his feelings for her.?

“I didn't realize it until after you left Enterprise. I should have sensed it sooner however the stress of the Expanse and our missions that followed, made me over look it until then.”

“So this has been going on for a while? How long?” Trip wasn't angry, but his voice demanded an answer.

“Maybe even before our leaving for the Expanse, I'm not sure.” T'Pol’s eyes were wide with concern.

”And the dreams I’ve been having? Are they just dreams?” Trip asked uneasy. He wondered, his seeing her thoughts weren't the only types of dreams. She had asked him before this little show, had she known the content of the other dreams he had about her?

“No..... They were not dreams. Our souls were merely coming together at a time when neither of us could resist. When we sleep, all barriers are down and are souls naturally seek out one another.”

“Are you telling me.... The things we did in those dreams were real?” T'Pol again nodded.

Trip looked a bit sheepish. He knew the content of those dreams and felt some protection in thinking that no one else knew of them. T'Pol knowing what occurred in them was a bit more than he was ready for. He took a moment to digest what she had been saying to him then started.

“Have you been seeing my thoughts?” He asked and looked back into her eyes. Again he wondered why she couldn't see the love he held for her.

“No, I have not entered your mind. It would not be right to do so without your permission.”

“Then how come I can see yours?”

“You have not got the mental discipline to avoid it. Without blocking my mind, you are able to enter freely and don't even know that you're doing it.” T'Pol raised her eyes back to him.

“When were you gonna tell me?” Trip wanted to know why T'Pol found it hard to give him this information.

“I knew not how to break it to you. It is not an easy thing to speak about.”

“Not even with me?” Trip smiled feeling her sadness.

“You do not understand Trip, this bond we share is permanent. It will never lessen and can never be broken.” T'Pol looked him right in the eyes her words were precise and held much meaning.

Trip saw her demeanor and straightened. “You mean we are stuck with each other?”

T'Pol lowered her head, she wasn't sure if Trip was okay with this news. “I understand your anger with me now."

Trip looked confused at this response. “I'm not angry.... For the first time all this makes total sense.... Why..........?, Does this displease you?”

She shook her head softly then brought her eyes to meet his again. “Honestly, I am thankful to be bonded with someone I hold a deep connection with.”

Trip remembered that phrase from his time on Vulcan. It was T'Les who used that phrase when speaking of her husband. Now T'Pol was speaking of him that way. For Trip, that was the sweetest words he could hear from the young woman. His mind raced with hope for the first time in a long while.

The young commander reached over with his hand and brought the face of the Vulcan to meet his. He looked deep into her brown eyes, search them for any hint of doubt. He found none, only acceptance. “I love you too.” And with that he brought her face close to his and kissed her softly upon the lips. Trip felt something within him stir, a warmth and tingling he'd only known once before,..... their night together.

Trip smiled at her gentle brown orbs as they pulled away from each other. His grin grew as he thought about the man who might have stolen her away from him. “Wouldn't Koss be surprised if he went to bond with you and found me there?” Trip's smirk grew larger and saw a mirror type image appear on his beloved’s face.

“You smiled!” Trip was surprised to see this very beautiful feature appear on her face. “You can do that here?”

T'Pol nodded, “I need not hide my emotions from myself.”

“I like it...!” Trip returned taking great enjoyment from this new view of T'Pol.

He pulled her close again, burying her face firmly against his chest. Trip could feel her heart beat as they sat and explored each other's consciousness. His chin brushed her hair, its silken feel both was soothing and mesmerizing.

“What would you have done.... bout Koss I mean.” Trip stared out into the white space in front of him.

“I was never going to bond with Koss in the first place.... I only went through with the wedding to regain my mother's position. I could not be bonded with someone when my heart was with someone else.” T'Pol removed her head from his chest and looked up into his eyes. Trip could feel all the love and desire he had for her being returned 10 fold. His mind grew hazy as his desire for her only increased. He once more took her mouth to his, feeling his need growing moment by moment. T'Pol relaxed her defenses and allowed his touch. She bathed in the love that was flowing through their bond. Her desires grew as well, and she gave in to those desires allowing Trip to take them to any level he wanted.

Passionate kisses and caresses were feeding off the increasing level of arousal. Trip knew if their souls had their way, this would become yet another of those sweat drenched dreams they both had been suffering from. He longed for the real thing.

“T'Pol, I want this to be more than a dream...” He looked in her eyes waiting for an answer. It came in the form of a soft smile.

“How do we get back to reality...?” He asked, his body tense with excitement.

“Simply desire to wake up, beloved. I will be waiting for you.” She returned him a soft smile.

Trip felt concern growing deep inside. (what if this really is just a dream... I can’t awake to find her cold and dismissing again... I need her, I am incomplete without her.)

Trip saw T'Pol looking back at him. For the first time he heard a soft voice enter his mind. (you complete me as well beloved.) with that voice came waves upon waves of love and caring. More than he ever felt in his life, and suddenly Trip’s fears were gone. He closed his eyes and forced himself to consciousness. When he awoke, Trip looked down at the sleeping form of T'Pol. She now lay in his arms, her head pressed against his chest, and her body substantially leaning against him. Trip dreamed about this, desired it so but this still didn't tell him if what he had just seen was all a dream. It wasn't until her eyes opened and fixed upon him that he knew it was real.

T'Pol reached up her injured hand and brushed the back of it against his face. He took it gingerly in his and kissed at the green discoloration there. He then leaned his face down to meet her lips. They joined once more in a passionate kiss as he protectively wrapped his arms about her.

In his mind, Trip saw a collage of images racing through. All the times he and T'Pol spent together creating their friendship and building their bond. They made him dizzy, coupled with the feelings of passion that their touches were creating. The two, continued kissing and caressing for many moments. Their movements fuelling a fevered frenzy neither could resist. Trip pulled away and looked into her shadowed eyes. Through their bond his mind sought approval to continue. It was answered by a gentle nod. Trip's hand came up to undo the fastenings of her uniform. He rolled her atop him, and eased the zipper downward slowly.

T'Pol maintained her gaze directly at him. She kept her mind open to his allowing him to feel all the sensations his touch was causing. With each movement Trip received a new wave of arousal, beyond a level he'd ever been. His breathing grew rapid, his voice a mere whisper.

“You do know I've loved you for very long time.” Trip needed T'Pol to understand his desires were that of love not lust.

“As I have, you, my beloved.” She returned, urging him to continue. With that Trip eased her uniform from her shoulders. He slid it gingerly past the splint and downward. T'Pol skin came alive with his touch which only intensified the feelings she sent to him through their bond. Trip inhaled quickly, his breath caught by another wave of arousal. He pulled her to him running his hands along her back, kissing her mouth and drowning further in the arousal overtaking him. They continued their encounter well into the night, each allowing the other to explore fully their needs. Truly spent, they eventually fell asleep in each other's arms and remained there until the wee hours of the morning.

When Trip did awake, at first he thought he'd had another one of those dreams. But finding T'Pol’s naked form against him, he realized all of it had been true. An overwhelming state of joy filled his being and he pulled the lovely woman securely to him. This bond of theirs was what saved them both from a life of loneliness. He now knew what it was like to be truly happy and would always know because of her.

The End

Hope you enjoyed this little glimpse into her life. I am thinking of continuing, a day after sort of thing, but first have to get “Addendum” out.
Will consider it though. In the meantime hopefully will get a new episode soon. Till then.... T.

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Eight hardy souls have made comments

Loved it! Great story - Looking forward to reading your continuance. Happy Friday!

i loved it please continue it

I loved all of it. Great

Thanks for the feedback. I'm glad you liked it. I am gonna do the day after called "Q&A" but have to get "Addendum" out first.....Thanks again.....T.

I really enjoyed this especially since I didn't start watching till season 3 and you have given me a flavour of what may have gone on then.

Same here... I picked up the show at the end of season 3!

I loved seeing what I missed. This was great! I wouldn't say no to a sequel! :-)

Second time for me to read this, forgot to review the fist time. Great story.

awesome view point and great story weaving, complex but touching and finally with a happy ending!!!!! Please write a followup