Midnight with Pon Farr- pt 3

Midnight with Pon farr

By Triplover

Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer in Part One

Part Three

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"Mr. Tucker, Is there something you need?" T'Pol asked, her voice was just as low as his had been.

"Yeah uh... I need to talk to you." he told her.

She closed her eyes for only a second. She was worried; he could see it on her face... as plain as his own. Gracefully, she moved away from the door and let him through. When the door closed, she walked over to him.

He sat down on the bed, rubbing his legs, trying to find the right words. "We need to talk about last night—what we did." Trip said with a sigh so loud he was sure everyone in the ship could hear. Slowly she sat down next to him, her eyes kept away from his, from him. Once she sat down, he did the same. Looking away.

"I agree. What happened... last night... has changed... many things."

"Yeah, I know. But I don't want to... I don't want our friendship to go by the wayside because of one night. T'Pol, when I first met you... I thought you'd be just another heartless Vulcan. But you’re not. You’re more than that—you’re more than I expected you to be. When the cap’n told me you'd be stayin' with us... I didn't think you'd last a week! But now... bein' round you... for two years has changed all of the things I used to feel. I'm happy you’re here, and I believe you’re happy being here, too. I don't want to lose your friendship. I know our personalities collide sometimes--and I know at times I can get a little emotional... to the point that you could begin to feel uncomfortable. But we are friends. And I do care about ya. I always will. I love havin' you as a friend. I don't want to lose that feelin' I get when I'm with ya. But now I feel I just might have after last night."

T'Pol didn't talk for awhile. Probably getting’ her words together.

"You... haven't lost anything Mr. Tucker. We are still friends. I... I... just didn't have control last night. I still don't have control." T'Pol told him.

"What do ya mean? I thought the pon farr was resolved!"

"It was. It is. But when I was on the planet... I was infected by some branch which had some sort of aphrodisiac. At the time, I was going through the pon farr. The branch just made it more intense. And the effects last longer than they normally would. I still have the feelings... of wanting you... they aren't as intense, but they are there."

"So does that mean... are you... still in danger?" He asked her. She shook her head. Trip felt the weight that had formed over him disappear. He wasn't sure he wanted to go through what happened last night. It was…nice... but if it would hurt his friendship with her... it wasn't worth it.

"No, I am fine. But… the feelings for you have not gone away alone with the pon farr. Traditionally, when two Vulcans are married, they mate, and are connected together… on a personal level because it is a physical connection… just as much as it is a mental connection. Because of the pa'nar syndrome, that for me has changed somewhat… but with pon farr controlling me… such things didn't matter. I didn't want to risk… anything… happening… but I lost control. I saw you inside."

"I know. I felt you… inside me. Just as I felt me inside of you. In more ways than one…" Trip had never felt anything like it. It was like being together… seeing each other at that moment and not just physically. He'd probably never feel anything like it again… Trip looked into her eyes… and knew she felt the same way. Their eyes seemed to lock together, with the same desires. At that moment he could see everything in her eyes. Everything in her just as it was in him. Then it was ripped away as T'Pol looked down, a motion that was becoming very familiar. Slowly she put her left hand onto his right. Her hand was soft and warm on his, and her fingers interlaced with his. Her eyes looked back up into his.

"I know everything now… everything you ever felt. I've never felt the same since… I've never felt anything so, wonderful." She said to Trip's surprise.

"I uh… I don't know what's happening to us… but I know last night… last night… Oh damn it T'Pol! I hate it! Ever since that day I haven't been able to think about anythin' but you. I've tried everything but my mind always comes back to you. To your eyes, your lips… your body. I don't know if things will ever get better! It's killin' me T'Pol! Right now, I'd give anythin' to hold you, to feel you close to me! I can't take it! This whole thing was a bad idea!" Trip stood and walked to the door, anger beating through his heart.

"Please! Wait!" Trip stopped and turned around. When he saw her he saw the same thing… her feelings were clouded to her, but he could see them. "I know how you feel. Because… because… I feel the same way."

Trip moved towards her, feeling his emotions completely take control. Good. He thought. Let them. T'Pol stood and their lips moved close to each other. Trip took her in his arms and they kissed. Gently still together they slowly went down to the bed, him on top of her as their eyes closed and his tongue slipped between her lips. But-- even to his surprise, he stopped and moved away, sitting up at the end of the bed. T'Pol sat up, looking at him with a questioning stare.

"I can't do this." He whispered.

"Why?" She asked him.

"T'Pol… I can see your feelings. Are you really over the pon farr?" He asked.

"The pon farr is gone. though the branch is still affecting me, if that's what you want to know." She mumbled.

Trip sighed. "I was afraid of that. I can't do it… I can't take control of you just because of my feelings. It wouldn't be right. Your feeling are controlling you… I can't let the same thing happen to me." Trip got off the bed and stood. T'Pol grabbed his arm.

"The branch is blocking out my control, yes. But the feelings are real. Very real." She told him. Trip looked down at her.

"Yeah, but what happens after this? What happens when you gain the control back? What happens when you realize this may be a mistake? I can't take that risk."

"But I can. I don't know what will happen when I gain control, but I do know this. Just because I gain control, doesn't mean that I lose my feelings for you."

"Feelings?" Trip asked.

"Yes… I may be Vulcan… but I still…feel." She said in a stern voice. Trip sat next to her. His eyes looking forward for fear that he would let his emotions control him again.

"I won't see it though. I won't see it in your eyes, or feel it when you look at me. Will I?" He then asked. T'Pol touched his chest.

"Yes, you will. You'll see it in here. You'll feel it in here. And you'll know. You'll know that what's inside of me hasn't changed." She answered. Trip smiled, then allowed himself to look at her. He took her hand that was on his chest and held it in his.

"That's good enough for me." he said, and they kissed. When they pulled away he lay down with one hand behind his head, T'Pol's head lying on his chest.

"You know, you really are beautiful." he whispered. Trip felt T'Pol's head go up slowly with his chest. Then she looked up at him. Then slowly she gave him another small kiss. When they again broke away he smiled.

"Well, I'm gonna have to say that more often!"

~*~*~*~*~*

Charles "Trip” Tucker sighed. He was tired from the night before. He hadn't gotten much sleep so he was in a pretty grumpy mood.

"Hello." Trip turned away from his console to see Malcolm Reed standing there in front of him with a smile firmly implanted on his face.

"Hey Malcolm." Malcolm cocked his head.

"Are you all right, ol' boy? You look rather tired! Rough night?" The question gave Trip a slight smile. Rough eh, certainly was! "I guess you could say that."

"Maybe you should see T'Pol, have a little afternoon rub." Malcolm joked.

"Very funny, Malcolm."

"Just a little humor to lighten the mood."

"There a reason you're here?" Trip asked, moving over to another console to check some readings.

"I've been having trouble running a diagnostic on armory functions." Malcolm told him.

Trip sighed. "Great! Somethin' else I gotta fix! Why the hell were you running a diagnostic on armory functions anyway?"

"You can never be too careful. Perhaps you can do what you’re doing later. After all, we need weapons." Malcolm offered, Trip rolled his eyes.

"No one asked you what I could do later!" Trip almost yelled. A few ensigns looked at him in surprise. But today, he didn't care. He was tired, he hadn't eaten and he was sure he'd pulled a muscle last night.

"Well, someone's having a bad day!" Malcolm said under his breath. Trip looked up at him. His mood was as sour as a lemon and he knew he shouldn't have yelled, but Malcolm really wasn't helping.

"I'm sorry Malcolm. I uh… I'm just dealing with too many things right now. Work… life… other things!"

"Ah… and what exactly would these "other things" be?" Malcolm pried. Trip half smiled.

"Malcolm, have you ever… done somethin' that you knew might be a mistake cause later it might make things awkward?" Malcolm thought a moment.

"I suppose one or twice maybe. Why?"

"Well, it's kinda private. Let's just say I'm having a little trouble of my own that's eating the hell outta me!"

"Let me guess, could it have something to do with SubCommander T'Pol, perhaps?" Trip looked up at Malcolm in surprise. "I saw you leave her quarters yesterday, that morning."

"Good god! Who else saw me yesterday?! What?! Was the whole world followin' me or somethin'?!"

"Actually, just me and the captain. I was telling him our weapons status, when we saw you sneak out of her quarters. You looked pretty busy at the time so we choose not go into it." Trip sighed for what seemed to be the hundredth time. Something told him that the day wouldn't be getting better anytime soon. How in the world—well, space—had they seen him? He had looked! He never saw anyone!

"For the last time, I had just come that mornin' to ask her somethin'! I didn't want any of ya'll gettin' the wrong idea so I tried to keep it quiet. I looked all around to see if anybody saw me. How the heck did you see me?"

"Well, when we saw you, I guess you had just finished looking around because you began to walk away. Ensign Mitchell had seen you walk in there last night with the same clothes as we saw you in the next morning… what did you have to ask that took all night?" Malcolm said with a smile.

Trip sighed. Again.

"Great… now everybody thinks I'm messing with T'Pol! Just what I need! I went there last night… when I left I went home and crashed. I had a rough day last night and after our session I went home. The next mornin' I realized I'd left somethin' over there and so I went over, I didn't think to change." He tried to explain.

"Why not just get it that night when you had your next session?" Malcolm asked with a growing smile that soon turned into a grin.

"It was important! I didn't wanna wait! We didn't do anythin'! I just wanted to get somethin'! That's all!"

"Oh, is that so? Then why were you there again this morning?"

Trip frowned. "You were followin' me!?!"

"No, I heard a few ensigns talking about it." Malcolm said. Trip ran his fingers through his hair. Trying to think fast. Damn. He was the laughing stock of the crew/

"Look, I was there on a personal matter."

Malcolm grunted. "I bet!"

"Malcolm! It's not like that! I was talkin' to her bout my… my… uh… my sister." Trip lied. Malcolm frowned.

"Oh… I see. I thought-"

"I know what ya thought Malcolm. But she's a Vulcan. Could you really see me, with a Vulcan?" Trip asked. Malcolm's smile returned.

"I guess not. You and T'Pol… that would be an interesting match! You’re probably right; you and the Sub-Commander wouldn't last a week."

"Hey!" Trip fought.

"Oh come now, Trip. Do you honestly think, that the Sub-Commander… a Vulcan, would tolerate your many bursts of anger?" Malcolm asked.

Trip frowned. He was right… "Maybe… I don't know… aw forget it! It's not happenin' anyway," he mumbled.

Malcolm looked Trip. "Trip, do you have… any feelings for her?"

Trip's eyes went wide. "She's a Vulcan!"

"Yeah, but you didn't answer my question. How do you feel about her?" He asked again.

Trip swallowed. Did he? He couldn't! Could he? "Malcolm, even if I did—and I'm not sayin' I do- it wouldn't matter. You said it yourself; it wouldn't work out."

"True, but you still haven't answered my question. How do you feel about her Trip?"

Trip thought for a second. He didn't know what to say. "No." He finally said, and knowing at that moment that he had just lied.

"Hmmm, I thought for sure you'd say yes." Malcolm mumbled.

"I'll send someone down to the armory as soon as I can." Trip told him. Malcolm nodded, then left. He loved her? He couldn't believe it. But in his heart…

*************

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One person has made comments

I love Malcolm dearly, but...
Stupid, stupid STUPID Malcolm for starting any doubtful thoughts in Trip! Oblivious, gullible Brit!

::Sigh::

That said, wonderful chapter. So nice that Trip is holding on to his morals, trying to make their friendship survive. Can't wait for more!