She Walks in Beauty-txt

She Walks In Beauty

By Shiaw Mei Mei

Email: shiawmeimei@yahoo.com
Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: Paramount owns them. I just play with them. This story is for entertainment purposes only and no money exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author. This story may not be posted elsewhere without the consent of the author.
Category: Romance
File Size: 145 kb
Archive: Trip/TPoler’s (Please!)
Spoilers: “Harbinger,” “Zero Hour”
Season: Season 3 – The trip home
Summary: Trip and T’Pol surprise themselves on the journey home from the Expanse.

Author’s Note: My first Star Trek fic. Please be gentle but please give feedback! And yes I am ignoring the Aquatics assistance in the season three finale. I needed some time. So shoot me!

”She Walks in Beauty”

She walks in beauty, like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies;
And all that's best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes:
Thus mellowed to that tender light
Which heaven to gaudy day denies.
-Lord Byron

Chapter One

Trip Tucker had had better nights. He lay on his bunk staring at the ceiling when he should be sleeping. Of course, it could have been worse. The Enterprise was on the way back to Earth. His best friend, Jonathan Archer, was dead but Earth was okay. The Xin’di weapon had been destroyed. Jon had seen to that. Personally. The people that had murdered seven million of Earth’s inhabitants had seen that they were being used by their mysterious allies and had agreed to peace with Earth. His grief over Jon’s death was painful but was allayed by the fact that Jon had died for his mission. That was the best way to go in Jon’s eyes if he had to die. But Trip still couldn’t shake off his insomnia.

It wasn’t as bad as it had been when his sister, Elizabeth, had died. That had been torment beyond belief. The only thing that kept his sanity had been T’Pol’s neuro-pressure treatments. That and T’Pol herself. She had become his best friend next to Jon. If Trip really thought about it, she had actually displaced Jon as his best friend. A lot of things about Jon had changed during their time in the Expanse. He wasn’t the same man that had led them off on their initial exploration of the galaxy.

T’Pol had become very important to Trip. His eyes narrowed at the thought. She was almost too important to him. If he had to admit it, and he wouldn’t, not even to himself, he loved her; he was in love with her. They had built a solid friendship throughout this mission. He knew her better than anyone else on board, possibly better than anyone anywhere. She had changed as well. She had become more accessible. Trip still hadn’t seen a smile on her lips but he had seen them in her eyes. T’Pol had a wonderful sense of humor but she only shared it with him. He knew that if he tried to tell anyone about it that they would think he had lost his mind.

Trip trusted her with his life and more. They had one night of incredible passion that she would not admit meant anything. He smiled at the memory of that night. She was passionate, being Vulcan notwithstanding. He knew that she felt uncomfortable the next day. T’Pol said it was only an experiment in “human sexuality”. He laughed to himself as he remembered the look she gave him over her cup of tea that morning as she tried to explain it away. He knew it meant something because of her discomfort. Had it not, she wouldn’t have looked so… surprised.

Trip was drawn from his reverie by the chirping of comm at his door. “Come, it’s not locked,” he called out, too lazy to get up to see who was disturbing him at this hour. If it had been urgent they would have contacted him through the ship’s intercom. The door slid open to reveal the woman he had been thinking about. Trip sat up quickly aware he was in his gym shorts and no shirt. He looked about for his t-shirt as she came through the door.

“Uh, what can I do for you T’Pol?” he asked, giving up on the shirt idea. “Is something wrong?” He looked at her closely. She was wearing her meditation robe, an unusual sight. He had never seen her wear it outside of her quarters. Her face looked almost troubled. Another unusual sight for T’Pol.

She hesitated as she saw his state of undress, his bed rumpled from where he had been laying. “I apologize. I should not have come here so late.” She turned to leave.

“No, T’Pol, it’s okay. I can’t sleep either. Please sit, talk to me.” He pulled a chair around to face his bunk and motioned for her to sit. He waited until she perched on the edge of the chair and then sat down on his bunk to face her. “Can’t ya sleep either?”

“No, I can not sleep, I can not meditate. I can not…” she hesitated. He could see that she was troubled. If it had been anyone else but T’Pol they would have been in tears by now.

“Hey, talk to me, T’Pol; you know you can always talk to me.” He wanted to touch her hand to reassure her but was afraid that she would pull away or try to leave. “I can not…” she hesitated again.

“Hey, what say we try some neuro-pressure? It always helped me to sleep, maybe it can help you too?”

She nodded slightly. He had become proficient at reading her. She was extremely upset and appeared to be exhausted. “Come on, sit here on the bunk, I don’t have any meditation pillows or anything, so this will have to do.”

T’Pol stood, shaking slightly, her control over her emotions wavering at the thoughtfulness of this particular human. He was part of her problem. He was her only solution. T’Pol opened her meditation robe and allowed it to puddle at her feet, revealing her blue silk night clothes. She wavered slightly before taking a seat on the bunk with her back to him; she eased her shirt off her back.

Although Trip had strived to build up a control over the normal male reaction to the sensuousness of her bare back during their sessions, he had to seriously suppress a sigh at the sight in front of him. He began to find the pressure points along her spine that she had taught him. He firmly controlled the urge to gently brush her back with his lips. Trip began listing in his mind all of the repairs that needed to be made during the long voyage back to Earth. Slowly he regained control enough to talk to her.

“T’Pol, why don’t ya tell me what’s bothering you?”

She stiffened slightly against his hands. “I am having trouble with my emotional control due to lack of sleep and meditation and as a residual effect of the Trelliam D. I will be fine. The neuro-pressure should ease my sleep dysfunction.”

He could feel her muscles tense more. “Okay, we don’t have to talk. Neuro-pressure isn’t gonna help if you keep tensing up.” He continued to work her muscles in silence. She wasn’t relaxing. If anything it was getting worse. “T’Pol, why don’t ya lay down on the bunk? Ya aren’t relaxing this way. Maybe if you lay down it will be easier to relax.”

She nodded and lay forward facing down on the bunk. He moved to straddle her back, keeping most of his weight on his knees, but his bottom was resting lightly on hers. He began the pressure on her spine again.

After several minutes he realized that her muscles had relaxed and her breathing was steady. He couldn’t believe it. She actually fell asleep. Trip smiled at the thought of her sleeping in his bed. He wasn’t about to wake her or try to move her. He stood up and moved her shirt up over her back. He pulled the covers up over her. He sat down on the chair facing his bunk and watched her sleeping peacefully. She looked like she could use it.

Trip quietly stood up and pulled his sleeping bag out of the closet. He made himself a bed near the bunk but not too close. He shut off all the lights except one small one opposite the bunk. He didn’t want her to wake up in the dark in an unfamiliar place. He settled down and drifted off. All of his sleeplessness evaporated with her near.

T’Pol knew there was something wrong. She could feel the danger in her nerve endings. She knew something was stalking her. She moved quickly through the corridors, trying to get to her quarters. She heard something. It was following her. She couldn’t look back; she didn’t want to know what it was. She moved faster. She tried to appear as if nothing was wrong. She heard it closer. She could feel the bile of panic rising in her throat. She couldn’t panic. She was Vulcan! Vulcan’s controlled emotions like that. They denied them freedom of expression! It was illogical to panic!! Panic encompassed her entire being. Logic flew in the face of raw emotion! She ran! She could hear it running behind her! She could hear it getting closer!! She felt a hand on her shoulder…

T’Pol started awake with a gasp as Trip touched her shoulder, trying to wake her from her nightmare. She sat up gasping for air. Her surroundings came into focus. Trip had pulled her into a tight embrace, holding her as her panic calmed. “Hey, T’Pol, it’s okay! I’ve got ya. Everything’s all right!” He continued to hold her, rocking her like a frightened child. T’Pol silently cried into his shoulder. Trip continued to hold her, rubbing his hand up and down her back, making comforting noises. “Its okay, T’Pol, I’m here, I’ve got ya. Ssshhh.”

T’Pol began to get control of her emotions again. She realized that she didn’t have her shirt on. Her bare breasts were pressed tightly against the commander’s equally bare chest. She moved to pull away, placing her hands strategically to cover her nakedness. Trip reached behind her and picked up her shirt. He pulled slipped it on her shoulders and pulled it around her. She slipped her arms into the sleeves and watched as he gently buttoned up her shirt.

“There, now, that’s better,” he said nonchalantly, as if it was nothing to comfort her nightmares and dress her. He pulled her into another hug. “You wanna tell me about it?” He rubbed his hands up and down her back.

T’Pol shook her head. “I… can’t. I…” She buried her face in his chest again.

“That’s okay, T’Pol. It can wait.” He rocked her gently back and forth for a minute longer until he could feel the tension easing in her body. “Lie back down, try to get some more sleep.” He moved to release her but she held on to him like a drowning woman holding on to a life boat.

“Stay. Please.” He barely heard her muffled words but he understood. He remembered the dreams about Lizzie in the beginning. If he had someone then that would have held him as he slept, it might not have been so bad.

“Okay, lie down while I get the lights. I’ll be right back.” She complied with his request but wouldn’t take her eyes off of him. It was like she was afraid he would disappear if she closed her eyes. He moved over to turn off the light he had turned on when he heard her panicked cries then swiftly moved back to the bed. She moved over in the small bunk so that her back was against the wall.

Trip fixed the tangled covers and then climbed in beside her. As he settled into the bed he felt unsure of what to do. She was plastered against the wall like she was afraid to touch him. He got as comfortable as he could without touching her.

“It’ll be okay, T’Pol. It really will,” he said softly. She let out a sound that was something between a gasp and a sob. His indecision disappeared as he reached out and pulled her close to him. She nestled her head on his chest right over his heart as he wrapped his arms tightly around her. “It’ll be okay,” he whispered in her ear.

Trip lay there for a long time listening to her breathing. She had fallen asleep quickly and she didn’t seem to be dreaming. He sighed at the situation. The most beautiful, wonderful, adorable woman in the world was lying in bed with him and he didn’t have a clue what to do about it. He finally drifted off to sleep enjoying the feel of her weight on him and her breath on his skin.

<,u>Chapter Two

Trip woke with a start at the sound of his alarm beeping. There was something missing. His sleep fogged brain tried to think of what it was. He caught a whiff of her scent. T’Pol. She was gone. The only thing that remained was her exotic fragrance. He sighed and lay back down. He wasn’t sure what was going on in her little Vulcan brain but he didn’t think that one good night’s sleep was the answer.

Trip got up to start his day and tried to push the night from his mind. He knew too well how easy it was to get caught up in thinking about her. He had a lot of work to do and the repairs on the ship wouldn’t get done if he kept his Vulcan mystery rolling around in his head all day.

“What a day,” Chief Engineer Tucker muttered to himself as he walked, grease and grime covered, into his quarters late that evening. Everything that could go wrong seemed to have today. He began stripping his dirty uniform off, dropping clothes in the floor, as he headed into the bathroom for a much needed shower. His brain kept running a list of things that still needed to be taken care of. Power fluctuations in the warp core kept happening. They thought they had taken care of every possible cause. They couldn’t go to warp until it was fixed. It would take forever to get back to Earth on sub-light speed.

Trip methodically washed off the dirt without thinking about it, his mind caught up in the day’s failures. “Oh, hell, turn it off for a while, Tucker”, he thought to himself. As he dried off, his mind turned to another problem. T’Pol. She had acted no different with him today than any other. There was no sign of what happened last night. No indication that she even remembered it. But she was like that; she was able to just turn it off when she set her mind to it. Of course, a good night’s sleep helped her in that respect. He knew that if she had gone without sleep or meditation for several days she had less control over her emotions.

He wrapped the towel around his waist and stepped into the living quarters to pull a clean pair of shorts out to sleep in. He used to sleep in the nude but with all the surprises on a starship he had learned the hard way that if was preferable to have at least something on if an emergency came up. He pulled the shorts up and walked back into the bathroom. He toweled his hair a little dryer and then proceeded to brush his teeth. It had been a rough day and he looked worse for the wear. “Oh, well, sleep will help,” he muttered at his reflection.

He pulled back his covers and crawled into bed. He hadn’t changed the sheets this morning and they still smelled of T’Pol. He pulled the covers up over his face and breathed deep. Her scent intrigued him and, strangely enough, relaxed him. He settled the covers back under his arms and started to drift off.

Trip was trying to wake up. He could hear something. The door? He looked at the chrono. It was after midnight. Who would be…? “Come!” he yelled rather shortly, not getting out of bed. The door slid open to reveal T’Pol. She had that same look that she had last night after her nightmare. It must have happened again. He sighed.

“Come here,” he said with understanding in his voice. He pulled the cover up to indicate that she should crawl in beside him. She quickly dropped her meditation robe and slid into the bed next to him. She curled up against him with her head once again on his chest as he wrapped his arms around her tightly. “Night, T’Pol.” She nodded against his chest as he fell back asleep.

Chapter Three

Trip woke slowly. The alarm had not gone off. His mind filtered the information and then remembered he had today off. He turned over to look at the chrono. It was nearly 1000. He rarely slept that late. T’Pol was, of course, gone. The past two weeks had developed in to a routine. He would be awakened by her climbing into bed with him sometime after midnight. She would curl up against him and immediately go back to sleep. She didn’t have any more nightmares while she was here. She seemed to sleep through the night only to leave before he awoke.

He wished she would talk to him about it. Trip still didn’t know what was in her dream that had frightened her so badly. He couldn’t imagine what would scare his stoic Vulcan companion. “Companion?” he asked himself out loud. Hell, what was she to him? Friend, yes, definitely.

Lover? Well, they had made love once but that was months ago. They didn’t talk about it and she acted like it never happened. If anyone on the ship had realized where their captain had been spending her nights for the last two weeks, no one would have believed that they weren’t lovers. He loved her. Trip had to admit that now. Her presence in his bed had finally made him realize how much of her presence was in his heart. It wasn’t sexual. Well, he did desire her but he wanted to comfort and protect her. He just wanted to be with her. He couldn’t say anything to her in her current state of turmoil. He couldn’t cause her anymore distress. He would do anything to keep her from further confusion or upset.

He thought back to that first night, when she cried. It almost felt like a dream. T’Pol was there crying in his arms. He remembered the feel of her breasts against him, her arms locked around his waist as if she would never let go. It quickened his pulse and caused a tightening sensation below his waist. He breathed deeply, using some of the meditation techniques that she had taught him to erase the memory and feeling from his mind and body. He didn’t want to let his physical attraction to frighten her away. He was the only comfort she had right now and he couldn’t do anything to change that.

Trip sighed. He wasn’t going to do anyone any good sitting here dwelling on it. He got up and went to change into his workout clothes. He hadn’t had much time to work out lately and he was feeling the lack. He was happy that engineering had managed to get the warp engines back on line. There was still a lot of work to do but he had insisted that everyone rotate some downtime to prevent burnout. T’Pol, in her capacity as captain, had insisted that he include himself in the rotation. He smiled as he remembered her stern look.

“Commander, you are only human. You need ‘downtime’ as well. I can not afford to have my chief engineer’s performance suffer from lack of relaxation. I must insist.” She walked away from him in engineering before he could protest, as if he would see the logic of her order without further discussion. He enjoyed watching her go, she was a sight coming or going. ‘Okay, Tucker, none of that kind of thinking,’ he thought wistfully to himself at the time.

Trip had enjoyed his down time. He was tired but pleasantly so. He had a good work out. He played chess with a couple of people that were hanging out in the mess hall. He got run out of engineering on three different occasions after trying to check on progress. His staff insisted that it was orders from Captain T’Pol. He even got in some target practice with Malcolm. Almost beat him too! He had lunch and dinner with T’Pol in the mess hall. Those had been the most enjoyable parts of the day. The rest of the time he spent reading or writing letters in his quarters. He had to admit it was renewing to take some time off.

It was late when he looked up from his book. He got up to shower and get ready for bed. He hadn’t realized how long he had been reading. It was almost midnight. He thought he heard something while he was in the shower. He stuck his head out of the shower door. ‘Nope, must be my imagination,’ he thought. He quickly finished his shower and walked into his living area to get his shorts with his towel around his waist. He pulled the shorts out of the drawer and dropped the towel to pull them on. As he turned to go back and brush his teeth, he caught sight of a pair of dark eyes watching him from his bed.

“T’Pol, I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were here,” he stuttered, his face starting to feel hot. His blush went into high gear as she said nothing but continued to stare at him. “Excuse me,” he managed to get out as he headed back into the bathroom and closed the door. Enterprise quarters were outfitted for minimal comfort and space, but he seriously wondered if he could manage to sleep in the bathroom. ‘Don’t be an idiot, it’s not like she hadn’t ever seen you in your birthday suit,’ he thought to himself as started to brush his teeth. ‘Just go out there and act like nothing happened, she certainly will!’

The worst part of it was that he should have known that she would be there soon. It was about the time that she always showed up. Was it a little Freudian slip he had committed there? He thought he had heard something when he was in the shower. ‘Leave it alone, Tucker,’ he thought to himself as he opened the door. He shut out the lights and crawled under the covers as she held them up for him. As soon as he was settled, she took up her normal position with her head on his chest. ‘Hell, we act like an old married couple’ he thought as he held her close, ‘past the raw passionate sex, just happy to be close.’

Trip listened to her breathing settle as she fell asleep. ‘Old married couple’ the phrase continued to roll around in his head. What would it be like to be married to her? He softly snorted his amusement at the question. ‘She wouldn’t marry a country bumpkin like me even if she were interested in hookin’ up with a human! What a ridiculous thought!’ He held her a little tighter. ‘I guess if this is all I am going to get, I should be happy with it. It’s a damn sight better than nothin’!’

He tried to let sleep take him but a sudden thought stabbed at his brain and his heart. ‘What will happen when we get back to Earth? Will she stay on with Enterprise, with Star Fleet? Will she go home, to Vulcan?’ His heart started beating faster; panic rose up at him like a tidal wave in a hurricane. ‘What if she leaves and I never see her again? I can handle our relationship however she wants it to be but what if she leaves.’ Trip felt his breath catch in his throat, tears welled up unbidden in his eyes. ‘She can’t leave, she can’t leave…’ His mind raced around those words like a mantra. Tears slid slowly down the side of his face, rolling past his ears into his hair.

Unconsciously, he squeezed her tighter. He couldn’t just let her go. He had to do something. He couldn’t live without her. He loved her too much. Trip’s breath was ragged, he was trying to keep from sobbing, and he couldn’t let her wake up and hear his out of control emotions. She would turn away from him completely if she had to be subjected to his dizzying range of emotions. He started working through some meditation exercises, ones that she had taught him. He started controlling his breath, easing the panic from his mind; slowly his breath resumed a normal pace, his heart rate dropping to its normally steady beat. He felt sleep tugging at him as he calmed down. His last conscious thought was that he had to talk to her. Soon.

T’Pol knew there was something wrong. She could feel the danger in her nerve endings. She knew something was stalking her. She moved quickly through the corridors, trying to get to her quarters. She heard something. It was following her. She couldn’t look back; she didn’t want to know what it was. She moved faster. She tried to appear as if nothing was wrong. She heard it closer. She could feel the bile of panic rising in her throat. She couldn’t panic. She was Vulcan! Vulcan’s controlled emotions like that. They denied them freedom of expression! It was illogical to panic!! Panic encompassed her entire being. Logic flew in the face of raw emotion! She ran! She could hear it running behind her! She could hear it getting closer!! She felt something grab her and squeeze her tightly…

T’Pol woke. She could feel the Commander’s arms tight around her. She could feel his panic. It wasn’t her panic, it was his. She kept her breath steady so he wouldn’t know she was awake. She could hear his rapid heat beat; felt the minute shaking that accompanied his quiet sobs. Her heart ached at the thought of him in pain. She could almost hear his confused thoughts, drabs of them coming through to her. ‘What will happen…?’ ‘Will she stay…?’ ‘Will she go home… to Vulcan?’ ‘…never see her again?’ ‘She can’t leave, she can’t leave…she can’t leave me!’

It took every ounce of control to keep from reacting to the confusing bits coming from his mind. Her mind was in chaos. She had not thought past getting Enterprise home. Evidently, neither had he until now. Could she just walk away? From Enterprise, from the Commander… from Charles. Trip, she had never thought of him as Trip. It was not logical to call a person by a name that was not truly theirs. Maybe she could use his given name Charles? She had once buried the thought of ever calling him by anything other than his rank or surname. It was not proper, even as friends. Vulcans did not use ‘nicknames’ and the proper Vulcan etiquette demanded formality with all others save mated couples.

Mated couples. They had been acting quite like they were mated. They had been sleeping together every night for the last two weeks. Only sleeping, although she was sure that someone had seen her nocturnal journey to the Commander’s, to Charles’s quarters. She had been receiving some unusual looks from her crewmates whenever she and Charles had stopped to talk or eat together. She was sure that others had assumed more than there was.

Would it be possible for a Vulcan and a Human to mate properly? They had had intercourse. ‘It was extremely adequate,’ she thought, she controlled the feel of a smile pulling at her lips. But there were other aspects to a Vulcan mating. The proper mental bond must be there. Sexual relations were a minor part of a Vulcan marriage. And then there was the question of children. Would Vulcan and Human DNA be compatible?

T’Pol shivered at the turn her mind had taken. Was she seriously considering the idea of mating with a human? ‘No,’ she thought, ‘I am seriously considering being mated to Charles.’ Logic would dictate that they were the same question. However, her logic had been supplanted by the attraction she felt toward the now sleeping man that was holding her so lovingly. ‘Lovingly?’ her logical side queried. ‘Yes, lovingly,’ her emotional side replied. ‘Would he be willing to continue their relationship if he understood the full implications of a Vulcan bonding?’ her logical side came back with.

T’Pol stared at the dark room. Would he? She sighed. She wouldn’t know unless she explained it to him. Could she do that? Could she bring herself to explain something that was so personal, so steeped in Vulcan tradition that children understood it without explanation? If she didn’t, she would never have peace again. This peace, of him holding her tightly even in his sleep. The peace of knowing that no matter what, he would be there for her in the night, and she would be there for him in the morning. She calmed her restless mind with a decision and let sleep take her back into her dream.

T’Pol knew there was something wrong. She could feel the danger in her nerve endings. She knew something was stalking her. She moved quickly through the corridors, trying to get to her quarters. She heard something. It was following her. She couldn’t look back; she didn’t want to know what it was. She moved faster. She tried to appear as if nothing was wrong. She heard it closer. She could feel the bile of panic rising in her throat. She couldn’t panic. She was Vulcan! Vulcan’s controlled emotions like that. They denied them freedom of expression! It was illogical to panic!! Panic encompassed her entire being. Logic flew in the face of raw emotion! She ran! She could hear it running behind her! She could hear it getting closer!! She felt something grab her and squeeze her tightly… She turned to see the sad blue eyes of Commander Tucker. “Please don’t leave me,” he whispered. She held him close as she whispered back, “Never.”

Chapter Four

Trip realized before he opened his eyes that something was different. He breathed deeply of T’Pol’s scent as he held her close to him. She had turned on her side at some point in the night and he was spooned up against her back. ‘God, she feels good,’ he thought. He wondered if he had awakened early or she had overslept. In the last two weeks she had always been gone when he woke. He buried his face in her neck, feeling the softness of her skin against his face.

“Good morning,” her voice said quietly.

“Very good morning, T’Pol, you are still here,” he smiled into her neck. “I kept thinkin’ that you were a dream since you were never here when I woke up.”

“I need to apologize for my unusual behavior.”

“Why? You were havin’ a rough time and I was able to help. That’s what friends are for!” He was worried about where this conversation was going. It sounded like she had recovered from whatever was ailing her and was trying to tell him that it was over.

“Friends?” she said quietly. “Is that what we are,” she hesitated briefly, “Charles?”

His eyes flew open. She never called him ‘Charles’! Hell, he could barely get her to call him anything but ‘commander’!

“Uh, yeah, well, I guess. Very good friends,” he stammered, still worried but not as much.

T’Pol carefully rolled over on the narrow bunk to face him. “I had that dream again last night. It revealed something unexpected.” Her eyes seemed to be searching his for something. She must have seen what she wanted as she raised a hand to smooth his bed rumpled hair.

“I didn’t hear you, why didn’t you wake me up?” Trip sounded concerned that she had been frightened again by her nightmare. He cupped the side of her face with his hand.

“It did not affect me in the same manner as before,” she said softly, “I was not, uh, frightened by it this time.”

“Do you want to talk about it now?”

“Charles, what do you know about Vulcan mating rituals?” she asked her face inscrutable.

‘Okay,’ he thought, ‘it has something to do with her returning to Vulcan.’ He continued out loud, “Not much. Only what you told me when you decided to not marry Koss.”

“Vulcans marry for life. There is no divorce. During a mating there is a bond established, a telepathic bond. It cannot be broken. Even if a couple were to separate, the bond would continue unbroken for the rest of their lives.” She paused, seemingly to gauge his reaction.

He looked thoughtful as he answered her. “So, how telepathic is this bond? I mean, do you hear each others thoughts or just feel them, like empathy?”

T’Pol was struck by the rationale of his question. “The bond varies depending on the couple. Some mates can speak to each other through the bond at great distances. Others only have a sense of each other in close proximity. However, regardless of the strength of the bond, the extended absence of ones bondmate can be very, uh, uncomfortable. In some mates, especially those with very strong bonds, the absence can cause severe pain. Very strong bonds can also cause madness or death when the other mate dies.” She still searched his eyes.

“T’Pol, why are you telling me all this and how does it relate to your dreams?” His suspicions were roused by the information she was relaying. This was that super secret Vulcan crap that outsiders weren’t supposed to know about. Suddenly he worried about Koss. She said they had been bonded when they were children. Was it possible that Koss was exerting some kind of pain or control on her through the bond? “T’Pol, is Koss able to do somethin’ to you through your bond, somethin’ to hurt you?”

She watched the fear flash through his eyes and, to his extreme surprise, one side of her mouth curved in what could almost be called a smile. “No, the bond I had with Koss was tentative. It would have been strengthened at the mating ritual but since it was incomplete is had faded. The bonding of children does not have the same affect as the bonding of adults.” She watched his surprise at her smile fade to relief that she was unharmed by her former fiancé. “No, I am telling you this for a different reason entirely.”

T’Pol let out a sigh. Trip felt the surprises would never end - a smile, super secret Vulcan stuff and a sigh! This was one for the history books. He smile at her gently, “Then why are you telling me all this?”

“Because of my dream, because of what I believe you were telling me in my dream.”

Trip looked worried now. “I was in your dream?”

“Yes. I dreamed that I was being followed, that someone was chasing me. Each time I had the dream I was about to be caught when I woke up.” Trip just nodded as she continued. He had had those types of dreams before. “Last night I had the dream twice. The first time, my pursuer caught me, held me in a tight grasp but I woke before seeing a face. When I woke, you were holding me tight. You were upset. I could feel the strength of your emotions.” She saw his mouth drop open and a blush start up his cheeks.

“T’Pol, I’m sorry, I never meant for you to hear me last night. I would never do or say anything to make you uncomfortable around me, please don’t let this affect our friendship!”

She raised her hand to his mouth, silencing him with her fingers on his lips. They were so soft. She appeared to be distracted as she ran her fingers across his lips. He tried to suppress a shiver at the feel of her fingers.

“Let me continue, Charles.” He nodded as he gently grasped her hand against his lips. “I realized the distress you would feel if I left Enterprise. I thought that I was experiencing only your distress until I realized that I was experiencing my own as well. I do not want to leave you either, Charles.”

His hand grasped hers harder as his lips lightly kissed her fingers. His eyes welled up with unshed tears. It was all he could do to keep from pulling her close and holding on to her forever. He hesitated only because he was afraid to get his hopes up too high only to have them dashed.

“Charles, do you now understand why I told you of the Vulcan mating rituals?”

She saw his eyes dawned with realization. She could hear his silent fears through the simple touch of his hand. ‘Oh, God, there’s more to it than just loving each other! What if I can’t ‘bond’ with her? Will that mean that we can’t be together?’

“Charles, we can bond. To some degree, we already have. I can hear your strongest thoughts when we touch. I can hear your fears now.” She spoke softly as the tears in his eyes escaped his control. “I would bond with you. I want to bond with you. And evidently we can bond, though to what degree remains to be seen.” She caught the silent tears with her fingers. “The real unknown in our situation is whether you want a permanent, lifetime relationship with me. It would be forever.” She moved her hand to his lips again to stop him from speaking. “Please let me finish before you answer. Listen to me carefully. It would be forever. For the rest of your life. Depending on the strength of the bond, we would never be able to be too far from each other for very long. Although my lifespan is normally much longer than yours, if I were to die first, you could be affected permanently by that loss. It is not a step taken lightly.”

Trip tried to slow his breathing, tried to control the tears that didn’t want to stop. She wanted him. She wanted to bond with him. Did that mean she loved him?

He tried to concentrate on her words. Forever. ‘Our minds, one and together… Touching, yet not touching; apart, yet never apart…’ The words in his head sounded formal. Where had they come from? It sounds almost ritualistic. Is that from her? Is that what she meant by mental bonding?

“T’Pol, I would go crazy if you left me, bonded or not. I love you. I guess I didn’t really understand that until last night. The thought of you goin’ anywhere without me hurts so bad I can hardly stand it. I want to be with you forever. I don’t care what the risks are!” He pulled her close to him, his tears not stopping. He didn’t know if they were from joy or relief or both. “T’Pol, whatever it takes, I just want to stay with you, always!” His kissed her forehead as he held her close to him.

T’Pol let the relief in his mind wash over her. “Charles, there are other things to consider. I don’t know if human and Vulcan DNA is compatible for children. Could you live without children?”

Trip hadn’t thought about it; he hadn’t thought that far. He had always wanted children. It was something he just assumed would happen in due time. Could he live without children? Could he live without T’Pol? If the only way to live with T’Pol was to live without children, then he could do it. “Yes. T’Pol, I couldn’t live without you. That’s all that matters.”

T’Pol sighed and let her arms tightened around him. They lay there quietly, their thoughts their own for now. If they went through with this, their thoughts might never be alone again. “Charles, there are other considerations as well.”

“Like what?”

“The bonding could be, uh, dangerous to you. Physically.”

“How so?”

“Normally when a Vulcan couple bonds for the first time, it sets off a chemical reaction, plak-tau, the blood fever that dates back to our beginning. It was a time of great violence and emotional conflict in our history.”

“How is it dangerous?” Trip softly questioned, holding her close to him. The details meant nothing; she wanted him, to marry him. He could hardly believe this was happening.

“The blood fever causes a Vulcan to lose emotional control. The first mating after the initiation of the blood fever can be violent. I am much stronger than you. I could, uh, damage you.”

Trip suppressed a laugh. He knew well her strength. She had used it on him before. “Honey, I would risk a little injury for you. I would risk my life for you. I love you.”

T’Pol sighed again. She knew he didn’t understand the full implications of the plak-tau. How could he? Vulcans didn’t speak of it among themselves and never to another race. “We would need to inform Dr. Phlox of our intention. He would need to be prepared for any eventuality.”

That got Trip’s attention. Well, she was serious about this being dangerous. But then Phlox could probably help answer some of the questions about children as well.

“Okay, when do we talk to Phlox?” he asked.

T’Pol held him tighter. She had chosen well. It didn’t matter that he wasn’t Vulcan. He was Charles. “Our duty shifts start in an hour so it will have to wait for now,” she said as she pulled back from his embrace to look into his eyes. “You must give serious thought to all I have told you. Once the bond is initiated it cannot be broken by anything except death. I know you love me; I can feel the emotions emanating from you when you touch me. However, love may not be enough. Our thoughts will always be touching, our minds always linked. There are mental shields that can be used to help with some privacy, but they are not perfect with a strong bond.”

The phrase that had been in the back of his mind came back to him. “Our minds, one and together … Touching, yet not touching; apart, yet never apart…” he whispered.

T’Pol looked startled. “What did you say?”

“It’s something that was rolling around in my head since you started talking about the bonding. I don’t know where it came from.” He looked at her closely. “What does it mean?”

“It is part of the bonding ritual. How could you know that?”

“Well, you said you could hear my strongest thoughts and emotions. Maybe I can hear yours also.”

T’Pol lay there staring at him. “It is unusual for even Vulcans to hear the most private thoughts of another that are not their bondmate. This could mean that the bond would be strong.” Maybe too strong, she thought to herself. Bondmates with extremely strong bonds were the ones that lost their sanity at the death of the other. She knew that, barring accidents, she would outlive Charles by at least one hundred years. Could she risk the insanity of his loss? Could she deal with the madness that could ensue? She saw the love in his beautiful blue eyes. Could she risk a hundred years of madness for 40 or 50 years of happiness?

Trip saw the hesitation, wonder and resolve that flashed through her eyes as she stared into his. “Would that be a bad thing?” He was concerned at the hesitation.

“No, t’hy’la, it would not,” she whispered.

‘T’hy’la’ the word rolled into his head. The meaning was understood, lover, beloved. He pulled her back close to him as his alarm started beeping at them. “Damn alarm.” She sighed into his shoulder.

“We must attend our duties. We should talk to Dr. Phlox after our shifts this evening.” She tightened her embrace on him slightly before releasing him and climbing out of the bunk. He sat on the edge of the bunk and watched her pull her meditation robe on.

“Meet me for lunch?” he asked as he walked her to the door of his quarters. She simply nodded. He pulled her close and kissed her lightly.

She turned to open the door but hesitated. She turned back around. He watched as she held up her hand, index and middle fingers extended, her thumb holding her ring finger and pinkie close to her palm. She looked expectantly at him. He understood. He raised his hand in a similar manner and she lightly touched her extended fingers to his.

Trip felt an unexpected shock at the touch of her fingers. In his head he heard the soft whisper of ‘t’hy’la’. He repeated the word in his mind and saw a pleased look in her eyes. She turned and left his quarters.

Chapter Five

Trip was in a daze all day. T’Pol wanted him; they were going to be bonded. His staff couldn’t figure out the goofy grin that he wore all day. They hadn’t seen the commander this happy since they entered the Expanse. It helped to raise the mood of the entire engineering department. They had all been working constantly on repairs and keeping the Enterprise working under such stressful conditions for so long. For the entire year they spent in the Expanse. Guess a day of rest was really a good idea when it came to their commanding officer.

When Trip met T’Pol for lunch, she extended her fingers to him again. He felt the same shock and heard the same word. It dawned on him as he touched her fingers; this was the equivalent of a Vulcan kiss! He knew that Vulcans were very private about their relationships with others. Touching lips in public would never be something T’Pol could be comfortable with. Hugging and holding her in front of other people would never be an option, but this touching of fingers was the Vulcan solution. Of course, no humans would realize the implications but other Vulcans would. Would they understand that Trip and T’Pol were bondmates simply through this touch?

T’Pol smiled with her eyes. He understood so much. He was able to read her so well, even her thoughts if she projected them. They ate their lunch mostly in silence. Words were not necessary. They left the mess hall so engrossed in each other that they didn’t notice that they were being observed.

Hoshi, Travis and Malcolm watched in amazement as the pair left. “Did you notice the goofy grin on the commander’s face?” Hoshi said. Of the three, she understood more about Vulcans than the other two. She had seen the surreptitious touch between the commander and the captain. She knew that Vulcans as a rule did not touch others unless they were engaged or married. The touch seemed innocent enough, but the way they held their hands seemed ritualistic.

“Yeah, I noticed, I also noticed it when I saw him in engineering this morning,” Malcolm replied. “His whole department noticed. I heard a couple of them remarking on it. What do you think it means?”

“Well, it certainly seemed to involve the captain. She seemed almost happy. And that’s saying a lot when it comes to her,” Travis offered in between bites of his food.

“I think we need a betting pool,” Hoshi said quickly. “I think we could make a fortune off this one.”

Malcolm looked surprised, “What are you talking about, Hoshi. Bet on what?”

“I am thinking that we will be hearing wedding bells soon,” she laughed. “And if we are the only ones that think that way, we could make a killing!”

Travis choked on his food. “The commander and the captain!? You’ve got to be kidding.”

“Nope, Travis, trust me on this one. I saw something that gives me the inside track on this one,” Hoshi said very confidently.

Travis and Malcolm started at each other and then Hoshi. “I’m in!” they said in unison.

Chapter Six

Dr. Phlox tried hard to not look surprised. He knew that Commander Tucker and T’Pol were friends. He had suspected for quite sometime that their feelings went further than that. However, sitting here listening to them explain their intention to bond according to Vulcan tradition seemed surreal. A human and a Vulcan bonded. Okay, snap out of it and answer their questions.

“Well, I don’t think that the bonding meld would harm Commander Tucker although I would like to run some tests. If a tentative bond has been established, I should be able to detect any potential harm by comparing current scans against ones taken prior to the initial bond. When do you think it first occurred?”

T’Pol and Trip sat quietly for a minute. T’Pol spoke first. “I believe you would need to go back to before the neuro-pressure treatments. Physical contact could have initiated it. That would be the safest assumption.”

Trip looked thoughtfully. “Yeah, ya know, I think that would be about right. At least five or six months ago.” That covered the period before their first sexual encounter.

“Okay, T’Pol, I would also like to take some scans of you as well. I will compare them to the information I have on you from that same time period.”

T’Pol nodded her agreement. “When?” she queried.

“It would take a couple of hours. I could scan one of you now and the other first thing in the morning.” Phlox eyes narrowed slightly. “Ah, when were you planning on initiating the bonding meld?”

“We hadn’t set a date, if that’s what you’re gettin’ at, Doc. We just started talkin’ about it this morning. We wanted your input but I don’t care what any scans say, I’m willin’ to go through with it no matter what and the sooner, the better,” Trip said anxiously.

“Oh, I don’t think that I will find anything negative. It would have shown up before now if there was anything detrimental happening in either of you,” Phlox said confidently. “I would like some time to consult the Vulcan database for anything that I can find on the bonding and its effects. “

T’Pol spoke up now, “Dr. Phlox, I would prefer that we initiate the bonding before we reach Earth. It could take two or three days to complete the initial bonding. We are still 10 days from Earth so it would need to be soon.”

“Ah, I see, you want to return to Earth with fait accompli. That would prevent any interference on the part of Star Fleet or the Vulcan Science Directorate.”

T’Pol merely nodded. Trip looked surprised. He hadn’t thought that someone would try to stop them. He reached over and squeezed T’Pol’s hand. “I won’t let anyone come between us!”

Phlox nodded and continued, “Are you going to have a human ceremony performed as well? I realize that a Vulcan bonding is much more binding than any human ceremony, but there could be legal ramifications without the documentation of a marriage on Earth.”

Trip hadn’t thought of that. Well, he would bind her to him in every way possible. “Great idea, Doc! T’Pol, would you mind that? Is it something you would want?”

T’Pol nodded. She was able to hear his train of thought through the touch of his hand on hers. “Yes, Charles, I would like that.”

Phlox shook his head slightly. Will wonders never cease? “Okay, who’s staying for the scans and who is coming back in the morning?”

T’Pol insisted that Trip be first. She touched her extended fingers to his before she left sick bay. Neither of them had eaten this evening. They had been anxious to see Phlox as soon as possible after their shifts ended. She went to the mess hall to get a salad and wait for Trip. Dr. Phlox had said it would be a couple of hours. She almost smiled at the idea that crossed her mind.

T’Pol was putting the finishing touches on her surprise when Trip opened the door to his quarters. His mouth hit the floor when he walked inside. There was a small table set for dinner, the smell of catfish wafting up from the warming dishes. Candles were lit everywhere and T’Pol, oh god, T’Pol was dressed in a long flowing gown of a silky material that revealed her slender arms and a discreet amount of cleavage.

“I thought you would be hungry by now,” she said simply. He had gotten her message to meet her in his quarters when he finished with Phlox. The look on his face was priceless. It was worth the effort to convince Chef to cook something not on the menu for today.

Trip walked over to her and pulled her into a fierce embrace. “I love you so much.” There was nothing else to say. She reveled in his closeness. She allowed herself to feel around him now. Bondmates were the only ones that Vulcans allowed emotional release with. Some allowed more than others, depending on the preferences of the individual couples. Her own parents had been, for Vulcans, emotional with each other. Of course, it would be nothing like the emotions that she received from her human t’hy’la.

“You must be hungry,” she said as she ran her hands up and down his back. “Sit, eat.”

“Yeah, I am hungry, but I would kill for a shower right now,” he laughed. “Let me take a quick one and then we can eat.” He squeezed her tightly before releasing her and heading for the bathroom.

She sat down at the table patiently waiting for him to finish his ablutions. She was curious as to what the doctor had found. She was not controlling her impatience well. T’Pol stood and walked to the bathroom door. “Charles,” she called through the closed door, “what did the doctor say?”

She heard him say something but even with her keen hearing, she couldn’t make it out between the sound of the water and the closed door. She opened the door slightly. “What did you say?” she asked.

Trip’s voice came from the shower a little louder. “He said that my brain activity was up by 5%. He said it probably had to do with the telepathic bond we had already established. He said it wasn’t harmful and that he would have been surprised if it had not been up.”

T’Pol nodded to herself. She, too, would have been surprised otherwise. She knew that the mental abilities of her people caused their brains to work at a higher level than that of humans.

Trip continued, “He also said that my serotonin levels were lower. He said that could be related to the completion of the mission and our return to Earth. He said that my stress levels while in the Expanse were extremely high.” Trip stuck his head out of the shower to grin at T’Pol, “personally I think it’s because a particular Vulcan I know has agreed to bond with me!”

T’Pol smiled slightly at him as he poked his head back in the shower. The sound of the water turning off made T’Pol close the door and return to the table. She had the urge to watch him emerge from the shower, to touch his body but she knew that it would be better to wait for the bonding.

Trip came out of the shower in his gym shorts and a t-shirt. He seemed to understand her need to wait for any sexual contact. It was hard to wait but he thought it would be worth it. Trip made his way to the table where T’Pol had already seated herself. She moved to serve him the catfish that she had practically order Chef to fix.

“Charles,” he loved it when she called him that, “we need to, as you phrased it to Dr. Phlox, ‘set the date’.”

“Yeah, you said it could take several days to complete the bonding. Why?” He relished the sense of intimacy, dining together in his quarters, talking about their future.

“The plak-tau, blood fever, can consume a Vulcan at the bonding may require several days to pass. Since I have no knowledge of interspecies bonding, I have only what I know about Vulcans to base my theory on. However, when a Vulcan bonding is initiated, the participants feel the raw emotions of our ancestors before the coming of Surak and logic.” She stopped toying with her salad and put her fork down. “I believe that through our mental bond you will be affected by my blood fever. This is what happens with Vulcans when one participant is not in the plak-tau and the other is. Of course, it is entirely possible that I will not enter plak-tau since you are not Vulcan. Usually the celebrant over the ceremony will induce the blood fever if neither participant is already affected. It would be safer to assume that we both will and plan our actions accordingly.”

Trip looked at her thoughtfully. “Okay, let’s assume worst case scenario. What will it be like?”

“Plak-tau brings out the raw sexuality that Vulcans try to deny in their everyday existence. We were once a very sexual, emotional race. Some Vulcan philosophers believe that the plak-tau remained with us after turning to logic to ensure the survival of the Vulcan race. There is nothing inherently logically about sexual activity other than procreation. If Vulcans were left to choose logically, many might never bond and have offspring, thereby creating a dwindling population. Of course, this is all conjecture; there is no way to prove the theory.”

Trip looked startled at her explanation. “How much raw sexuality?” He had always had excellent stamina when it came to sex, but she’s talking two or three days!

“We could be extremely involved with each other during the first few days of the bonding,” she said hesitantly.

“And this is why you wanted to consult with Phlox, because this could be an exhausting few days?” He was getting a little nervous at the thought. Could he handle her sustained sexual drive for that long? That one night that they had shared, when they had made love, he had been pushed to his limits. Hell, he’d been sore for three days afterward.

She nodded. He was catching on, to use one of his phrases.

Trip gulped and set down his fork. He had lost his appetite. “Let’s say, worse case scenario, you have this blood fever and I don’t, how will that affect the bonding?”

He continually amazed her with his grasp of the situation. She caught his eyes with her own to gage his reaction to what she was about to say. “The blood fever will cause my sexual tension to escalate. If you should have the blood fever as well, it will increase your, uh, stamina to accommodate my needs. If you do not, it could turn violent. I could, uh, damage you.” His facial expression was priceless. His jaw dropped open and his eyes went wide.

A shy grin started across his lips. “Well, I guess we’ll have ta make sure Phlox is on call the whole time!”

His look of amazement returned as she rewarded him with a slight laugh. “T’Pol, you just laughed! What’s goin’ on here?”

“Charles, I have explained to you on numerous occasions that Vulcans have emotions, we just control them. However, between bondmates that control is, in many cases, eased. My parents were quite comfortable about lowering their emotions when around just the immediate family. Not all Vulcans allow this, but more do than not.”

“T’Pol, I love you.”

“Charles, I love you as well.”

“T’Pol, set the date.”

Chapter Seven

T’Pol and Trip decided that they would need to communicate their bonding to at least the senior staff and Trip’s senior engineer. They could effectively be out of communication with the crew for three days. Although the Xin’di war was over, there were other dangers in the galaxy to contend with. They had agreed that Malcolm would command in T’Pol’s absence.

Malcolm, Hoshi, and Dr. Phlox entered the briefing room to find Trip and T’Pol already seated. T’Pol, as acting captain, took control of the meeting. “I have asked you here on a personal matter. Your discretion about anything discussed here is requested.”

Malcolm looked startled and Hoshi was trying not to smile. Trip thought that they had guessed something and thought they were about to finally find out if it was true. Phlox just looked like, well, Phlox. Of course he already knew what was to be discussed.

T’Pol continued, “Commander Tucker and I have come to an understanding. It is our desire to be bonded.” Malcolm’s jaw hit the table, Hoshi’s grin let go. They both stayed quiet as T’Pol continued speaking. “We have reason to wish the bonding to take place before we return to Earth. The bonding process could take up to three days during which time we will be effectively out of communication.”

T’Pol paused to let the information sink in. Malcolm was doing a fish imitation. Opening and closing his mouth as if he wanted to say something but couldn’t get the words out.

“Go ahead, Malcolm, ask your question,” Trip invited.

“Does this bonding mean, like, married?” he managed to stammer out.

“Yes. As a matter of fact it does, although we plan on a human ceremony when we return to Earth,” Trip said with a grin.

“I knew it!” Hoshi squealed. “I knew it! Congratulations, Trip, Captain!” She was practically jumping up and down in her seat. She punched Malcolm in the arm. “I told you so!”

Trip started laughing. “So there has been speculation about us, has there? How much did you make, Hoshi?”

Hoshi had the decency to look a little guilty. She blushed sweetly, “Uh, a bundle. But it’ll come in handy for buying a wedding gift!”

“Yeah, Hoshi, that’s why you started the pool in the first place, I’m sure.” Trip laughed. He could sense T’Pol’s confusion. He held out two fingers to T’Pol and she touched them with two of hers. He thought about what their conversation meant. He noticed understanding seep into T’Pol’s eyes. She got the message. Her eyes laughed a little bit.

It was Hoshi’s turn to look surprised. She had noticed T’Pol’s change from her stoic look of non-understanding to almost amusement. Could Trip have communicated the meaning to T’Pol through that touch? That was the same way they had touched in the mess hall that day.

“Well. Lt. Sato, I am sure you will use your winnings to acquire something appropriate,” T’Pol said. Hoshi just smiled.

“The point of the meeting is to assign command and engineering duties for the duration of our absence,” T’Pol steered the meeting back on path.

“Mr. Reed, you will be in command during this time. You will need to be prepared for the responsibilities. I will brief you on the issues that are currently at hand after this meeting. Commander Tucker will brief his senior engineer as well.”

Dr. Phlox cleared his throat as if he had something to add. Everyone looked at him expectantly. “The Vulcan bonding process is not something to take lightly. There could be some danger involved if it is interrupted. Everyone needs to understand that once it has begun, it can not be stopped until complete. If it is, it could be very damaging or even fatal to the participants.”

Hoshi and Malcolm looked startled. Malcolm recovered before Hoshi, “Don’t worry, Doctor. We can handle anything that comes up. They won’t be disturbed.”

Hoshi’s face schooled back into a professional mode, “Yes, sir, we can handle it. Don’t worry.”

T’Pol almost smiled as she said, “We will not worry, to concern one with future unknown events is illogical.”

Trip laughed out loud.

Chapter Eight

T’Pol had not moved into the Captain’s quarters after she assumed command. Trip and Malcolm had packed up Captain Archer things shortly after his death but T’Pol couldn’t bring herself to use them. It was illogical. It was emotional. But now, logic would dictate that larger quarters would be required if she and Charles were to be living together. Neither of their current quarters was sufficient in space for two people.

Trip and T’Pol waited to move their things into the Captain’s quarters until late that night. They weren’t ready for a ship wide announcement of their impending nuptials. That would come after the bonding but before they reached Earth. Trip had come in earlier and made the bed. All they had to do was move their few personal articles in and it was their quarters.

It was almost 0200 before they finished arranging everything. T’Pol’s meditation pillows and candles were set out. Trip’s pictures of his family and friends were arranged. Their clothes were put away. They were exhausted. It had been a long day. T’Pol wasn’t sure if she could sleep. She was completely wound up by the day’s events. They had decided that they would work one more shift, going over everything with Malcolm and the senior engineer. Tomorrow night they would begin the bonding.

Apprehension shot through T’Pol’s body. She worried about Charles. The thought of bonding seemed to be encouraging the onset of plak-tau. She could feel the edges of the fever invading her blood. She knew she could control it for one more day but how strong would the fever be by tomorrow night? She wanted this bonding more than anything; anything except hurting Charles.

Trip noticed her quietness while they worked. He had brushed by her several times to try and catch the mysterious link between them. He wanted to find out what was preoccupying her. “Hey, hon, are ya gettin’ cold feet on me?” he whispered as he put his arms around her from behind.

“No, my feet are not cold.” What a perplexing question!

Trip laughed in her ear, “No, T’Pol, it is a human expression for second thoughts, doubts about your decision to bond with me.”

“No, I have no doubts about that. Only apprehension about what I could do to you.”

“Hey, I can take care of myself. Even in this blood fever of yours, I don’t think that you would do anything to hurt me.” He squeezed her a little tighter. “Come on, we need some rest.” She nodded as he released her and went to get his night clothes. He changed in the bathroom allowing her privacy to change in the living area.

Trip came out of the bathroom to find her in bed already. She held up the covers for him to crawl under. Once he was settled, she snuggled up to him with her head on his chest. “Good night, t’hy’la,” she whispered.

“Good night, darlin’,” he whispered back as they both drifted off into a dreamless sleep, comforted by the bond that was reinforced by their closeness.

The next day had gone swiftly. Trip didn’t think it would have. He figured it would drag on forever considering what tonight meant. He was too busy in engineering to really think about it much. His senior engineer had groaned out loud when he was told what was happening. Trip laughed at the memory. The poor man lost a fortune to Hoshi. He was happy for Trip but he told him not to expect a wedding gift. He was broke.

T’Pol had a similarly busy day. Malcolm was nothing if not thorough. He wanted to know everything that T’Pol had been working on. Most of the scientific data meant little to him, but he still wanted an explanation for each thing. She was pleased at his attention to detail. It helped to relieve her concern at leaving her command to someone else for purely personal reasons. Of course, her plak-tau had progressed as she and Charles spent more time together. It would not just be personal soon. It would be a biological mandate.

Chapter Nine

T’Pol had Chef prepare several days worth of sustenance that could be stored in the Captain’s quarters. They would need food for strength but would be unable to leave their quarters and it was not advisable for anyone to enter while they were in the blood fever. Either she or Charles could become violent if one of them thought that someone was a threat to their mate. Since they would not be in their right mind during most of the process it was a real possibility.

Trip entered their quarters as T’Pol was securing the last of the provisions. He was covered in grease and grime. He grinned at T’Pol as she looked at him with askance.

“Yeah, I know, shower, now,” he laughed at her comical expression and headed for the bathroom.

Trip finished his shower and came out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around him. “Sorry, T’Pol, I forgot to get some clothes on the way in,” he said as he headed to the dresser. As he dug around looking for something to put on, he felt her presence behind him. He turned around to look at her, her eyes filled with something. Passion, lust? “Hey, sweetheart, what’s wrong?”

“Charles, it’s started.”

“What?” He was startled by the raw lust in her eyes.

“Plak-tau.”

“But we haven’t done anything yet?” His confusion was obvious.

T’Pol tried to pull some control from somewhere. “I believe that your constant presence in the last few weeks and the decision to bond has induced the plak-tau in me. Most Vulcans come to the marriage grounds already in the throes of the blood fever.”

Trip dropped his clothes on the floor, still standing there in his towel. “Okay, what do we do now?”

T’Pol nodded approvingly of his understanding. She took his hand and carefully placed his fingers along points on her face. She then did the same with her fingers along his face.

“Concentrate only on me and speak the words from before.”

He remembered the words that he had heard that first night they spoke of bonding.

“Parted from me and never parted. Never and always touching and touched.” He heard his words echo in her mind.

She whispered them back. “Parted from me and never parted. Never and always touching and touched.”

Trip felt the electricity between them, like when they touched fingers, but so much more. He felt like his blood was beginning to boil. He could hear and feel the passion awakened in T’Pol. It felt as if it was his own desire, but it wasn’t, it just added to his own. He could hear her thoughts; see his life reflected back to him from her mind as she probed his memories. All the pain, confusion, happiness and joy of his life crashed around him as she probed deeper. All the wonder of what she saw rushed into him.

‘Probe my mind, like this,’ he heard her voice but she hadn’t said anything. He saw what she meant and began to probe deeper. Her childhood, her thoughts, her pain, her joys, her insecurities, her emotions! They flooded him as he experienced her joy at the strength of the bond, the depths that he was able to probe. He felt the burning in her blood increase. The passion of her Vulcan heritage released and was carried by the bond to him.

Trip moaned at the wave of passion that crashed over him. He was instantly, painfully aroused by the crest of the wave that he now rode. The memories of their lives faded instantly, replaced by an insatiable need to have her. He could feel her arousal, there was no need to worry about her being ready for him; he knew she was. Her arousal made his even more painful. There was no past, no future, no Enterprise, no duty, only passion.

Trip pulled free of the meld. It had served its purpose. The bond did not decrease; it actually gained in strength as he swept her body up into his arms and swiftly deposited her on the bed. Together they tore the clothes from her body and the towel from his waist. He needed access, she needed him. He plunged into her hot wet depth, not thinking of anything but satisfying the need he felt in her, in himself. T’Pol moaned loudly as her entered her. Her arms wrapped around his neck, her legs tightly wrapped around his waist as he plunged over and over again. His hardness, his heat, his thoughts and his blood fever all making coherent thought impossible.

He felt her orgasm rising through the bond; it was like he was her and himself at the same time. The exquisite pain and pleasure of the link was more than he could bear. T’Pol felt his need rising, felt her pleasure reflected back from him. With a loud cry she let herself fall over the precipice into waves of pleasure. Her climax was more than he could bear so he followed her over. It felt like they rode the waves of pleasure forever. She held him so tightly with her arms and her legs, moaning as they fell endlessly into pleasure.

Trip’s blood was still boiling. It was a start but it wasn’t enough. It dawned on his fevered brain that he hadn’t even kissed her. She smiled as the surprised thought traveled down their bond. ‘T’hy’la, you see why Vulcans find kissing illogical,’ he could hear the amusement in her thought. He understood. The passion of their coupling had exceeded anything he thought possible.

‘Yes, darlin’, I do. But being illogical doesn’t make it less enjoyable’ he returned to her as he bent his head to capture her lips. She responded in a way that made any further thought illogical. Through the bond she knew exactly how he liked to kiss and she made good use of the knowledge. Trip thought he had died and gone to heaven!

They spent the night in each others arms. They were never far from each other as their passion would rise and fall. Trip lost count of the number of times they made love that night and into the next day. Each time different, in pace, duration and position. She had no experience to draw on except his and she used his knowledge to perfection. Trip would have never believed it possible. She was like a virgin and a whore at the same time. She knew nothing and everything.

T’Pol lay forward on Charles’s chest, her breath ragged from their latest coupling, with him, nearly flaccid, still inside her. ‘Beloved, we need sustenance. It has been at least 24 hours since we last ate. We can not keep up this pace without food.’ Her thoughts trailed into his mind. Trip groaned. He didn’t know if he had the strength to get up. He knew he didn’t have the desire to. He only had desire for her. At the thought of her, he felt his strength return and he started to grow hard again. She sensed his growing arousal and moved off of him quickly, or as quickly as her tired body would move. “Come on, Charles, food first,” she laughed out loud. It was a sound he really enjoyed hearing. She pulled him to his feet and toward the table. The forgotten food from last night was still there, sealed in storage containers to keep it fresh.

Trip laughed when she opened the first few. Pasta, different types of pasta. ‘Lots of carbs I see, darlin’,’ he sent through the bond. They had rarely spoken out loud since the bonding started. The sound of his voice actually startled him as he continued out loud, “Guess it makes sense, I feel like I’ve just run a marathon!”

As they sat down to eat Trip realized how hungry he actually was. It hadn’t seemed to be a concern before. Before now he was concerned with nothing except T’Pol. His mouth was full of pasta so he sent his question through the bond, ‘How is the bond working so far?’ There could be a significant advantage to communication through the bond.

“Better than I ever imagined it would be,” she said. “You entered the blood fever as soon as we melded. We have strong two way communication. You were able to probe my mind much deeper than I had ever hoped you would. Given all of the facts, I would say that it is a most successful bond.” She took a bite of her pasta and continued in silence, ‘I believe that the time we have spent together in the last three years has managed to forge something that most Vulcans don’t have access to. We became close friends before we became lovers. Most Vulcans are bonded as children and have very little physical contact with each other as they grow up. Their lives are filled with learning and meditation.’ She took another bite of her food. She continued through the bond as she chewed, ‘I would be interested in researching the difference between bondmates that were close before mating compared to bondmates that were not, measuring the strength of those bonds.’

Trip sat listening to her mind ramble on about research. He had just finished his second plate of pasta. Bondmates. That’s what they were. He looked at her, his mind clouding over with lust, even stronger now with some food to sustain him. T’Pol looked up startled at the strength of his desire flooding her mind. They hadn’t bothered to dress before eating. Why waste time? She dropped her fork as she pounced on him, nearly knocking the table over, and rolled him into the floor. The addition of food had renewed her appetite for him. They didn’t make it back to the bed.

It had been 48 hours since T’Pol and Trip had retired to their quarters. It had been that long since Phlox had gotten any rest. He hadn’t heard a word from them. He hoped that meant that everything was proceeding appropriately. He wished they could have set up a communication time table or something. He couldn’t interrupt them but he was concerned.

T’Pol was much stronger than the Commander. She could inadvertently hurt him in the heat of the blood fever.

As if reading his mind, his comm chirped. “Tucker to Phlox.”

“Commander, you sound, uh, healthy.”

“Don’t worry, Doc. Everything is okay. Great, actually. Uh, we just need a favor.”

“What can I do for you?”

“We, uh, kinda ran outta food.” The Commander sounded embarrassed. “We didn’t want to contact Chef directly because we didn’t really want anyone to see us in our… current condition.”

“I understand completely, Commander. I will get you some supplies and contact you before I bring them.”

“Thanks, Doc. And, uh, Doc, please hurry. We’re starving!”

“I’m on my way. Phlox out.” The good doctor left for the mess hall chuckling. He knew how much food T’Pol had taken to their quarters before the bonding. They must have had excessive activity to have consumed all of it and still be hungry only 48 hours into the bonding. Evidently, the bonding was extremely successful.

Chapter Ten

Trip and T’Pol finally emerged from their self imposed confinement after three days. Everything had run smoothly during their absence. There had been no emergencies, no communiqués, nothing untoward had happened. Malcolm, Hoshi and the senior engineer were still the only ones that knew what had happened, although there had been rampant speculation. To be fair, Hoshi had shut off the betting pool after she found out the truth. She claimed that it was because the pot was getting to steep for her to cover if she lost.

Hoshi was more anxious for the announcement to be made than Trip was! And that was saying a lot. He had wanted to announce it over the intercom the night T’Pol had asked him. Trip was on his way to the mess hall to talk to Chef as he thought about the last night of their confinement when they had discussed how to tell the rest of the crew.

“Charles, you should decide the method most suitable for humans. Vulcans would simply announce it in the media and be done with it. I have found humans require more of a celebration than Vulcans.” Somehow she had gotten turned around in the bed and was actually speaking to his toes.

Trip started rubbing her delicate feet as he thought about it. “Well, as usual, you are correct. We kinda like to pull out all the stops for weddin’s and the like. So, we have a party!” Trip felt the desire building in her again as he played with her feet. He was beginning to think that every part of her body was an erogenous zone. It didn’t matter where he touched her, she got aroused. Was that just because of the blood fever? Would they lose the passion once it stopped? It seemed as if the blood fever was almost gone now and he still couldn’t keep his hands off of her.

“Yes and no,” T’Pol replied to his unasked question. ‘It will not be as frequent as during plak-tau but the passion will still be there. Some Vulcans find sexual stimulation only during plak-tau but we had passion before we bonded. That is a sure sign that we have it afterwards.’

Trip kissed the arch of her right foot while massaging it with his hands. She moaned as he suckled on her big toe. T’Pol clutched at his legs, her breathing increasing in tempo. He proceeded to treat the left foot the same. ‘Can’t have favorites,’ he thought as he laughed. T’Pol couldn’t stand it anymore. She sat up, pulling her feet away from him. She looked at him with undisguised lust. Just the look caused him to begin to harden again. She started at his feet, kissing and nipping as she moved up his legs, alternating between the right and the left. Her eyes never left his face. Trip moaned loudly as she made her way to the sensitive skin of his inner thigh. She nuzzled his tightening sac with her nose before drawing moist circles around it with her tongue.

Trip grasped the sheets in his clenched fists. ‘Oh, god, T’Pol, you are making me crazy!’ He moaned louder as she slowly drew his sac into her mouth, sucking gently on each. After making him endure her exquisite torture she moved on to the sensitive skin of his lower stomach, carefully avoiding his hard cock. He knew what her intentions were, he could sense them through the bond but it didn’t detract from the eroticism of it. He could sense the new surge of wetness between her legs. T’Pol was as turned on by touching him as he was by her touch. She licked and nipped all around him, moving her hands up to his sensitive nipples, rolling her thumbs over them as he cried out.

Just when he thought he could take no more, she swiftly moved her mouth over his hard flesh. T’Pol lightly flicked her tongue over the leaking slit at the tip. His whole body jumped at the touch. Slowly she moved lower, running her tongue around the head, circling it several times. She had yet to use her hands on him. Just her tongue. He felt like he was coming unglued, like his body would fly apart any minute into a million pieces. She ran her tongue down his staff from the tip to the base and back up again. As she reached the tip again she quickly took him in her mouth, sucking him deep into her throat, her tongue moving to apply pressure as she sucked. Trip lost control. His body jerked hard; he could feel his climax rising as she pulled him out of her mouth to the tip, sucking hard on the tip, she drew him back in almost to the base.

“T’Pol, now, I need you now!” He felt her repeat the quick slide to the tip of his cock and sucking him hard in again. “I can’t hold back!”

She quickly moved to mount him. He moaned loudly as he felt her hot moist depths engulf him. She moved with a fast steady rhythm. She could feel his loss of control, his physical release just below the surface. She increased her tempo and pressure. “Oh, T’Pol,” he cried out again as he came hard, her muscles milking him as she clenched in her own orgasm. She fell forward on his chest, her breathing ragged. She raised her head up to look at his face. There were tears streaming down his face. Her confusion showed until she checked their bond. Tears of joy, they were tears of joy! What a contradiction in concepts!

Trip reached for her, pulling her up close to him, holding her tightly. “Oh, darlin’, I love you so much. You don’t know how happy you have made me!”

T’Pol kissed the tears away, savoring their saltiness. “On the contrary, beloved, through our bond I do know. It is most amazing to me that you could feel such depths of emotion for one person. But it is even more amazing that I feel the same for you. I never thought that such contentment was possible. It always confused me that humans should place so much of their contentment in one person. Now I understand.” She lowered her head to his and gently kissed his lips. ‘We should rest, my love. We will need strength to return to our duties tomorrow. And you, my husband, have a party to plan!”

Running the memory through his head was sufficient to arouse him again. He had to think of something else. He could also feel T’Pol’s discomfort through the bond. Idle sexual daydreams would affect them both. He changed his train of thought as she sent complex mathematical calculations storming through their bond. He laughed out loud. “Enough already, I get the message.” A startled ensign looked at him. “Sir?” Trip laughed again, “Nothing, ensign, I was talkin’ to myself.”

Trip walked into the mess hall to begin preparation of the party.

Chapter Eleven

Most of the crew was able to get to the party. A skeleton crew manned their stations. Trip would make his announcement over the intercom system so everyone would hear it. The crew that was here at the beginning of the party would rotate with those on duty so they could at least come to the party for a little while.

Trip and T’Pol arrived separately, coming from their separate duty stations. There were quite a few people already here. Everyone thought that this was a celebration for the end of the war. They were only three days out from Earth. Once they docked everyone would be on leave until the repairs and refit was finished. They would scatter to all corners of the earth to see friends and family. If they were going to celebrate together, they would need to do it before they arrived at space dock.

Trip took center stage and called for everyone’s attention. Hoshi manned the comm system so that everyone could hear. Some people thought it strange that Trip was speaking instead of the captain, but Vulcans weren’t much for celebrations so it made sense.

“Good evening, everyone! I am glad so many could make it tonight! All of you still on duty will be relieved so you can come down later. First, I want to thank everyone on behalf of Captain T’Pol, and especially Captain Archer, for your valiant efforts against the Xin’di. Jon was my best friend. I know that he would be proud of the way that you all acted in the face of mortal danger. I think he would have also been proud of the way that you have handled his death and the trip home.” Trip’s voice cracked a little bit. He could see tears in the eyes of many of the crew as he spoke about Jon.

“The second piece of news is of a more personal nature. I know that there was rampant speculation on why Captain T’Pol and I were confined to quarters for three days. I have heard various reports ranging from alien illness to T’Pol and me goin’ fisticuffs on each other and endin’ up in sick bay for three days. Well, we feel it’s only fair that we let you in on the truth.” He extended two fingers to T’Pol. She moved closer and touched his fingers with her own. “All I can say is there are a lot of people on this ship that owe Lt. Sato a whole lotta money since T’Pol and I were secluded to complete the Vulcan marriage rites.”

Gasps, moans, groans and applause were mixed. ‘Man, Hoshi musta really made out on this one,’ he thought to T’Pol. He continued after some of the noise died down, “We plan on having a human ceremony on Earth after we arrive and everyone is invited. Oh, and I will understand if there aren’t many weddin’ gifts but I will expect a really good one from Lt. Sato.” There was more applause and a lot more laughter. He laughed as he and T’Pol stepped away to be met with congratulations from all of the crew present. T’Pol endured the touches and hugs for Charles’s sake. It was difficult to maintain control amid so many emotions. Her control was still low following the completion of the blood fever. She reinforced her mental shielding with help from the bond with Charles.

T’Pol was exhausted. She and Charles had to stay for the crew that was relieved two hours after the party started. Her plak-tau had been satisfying but exhausting as well. She looked forward to a hot shower and sleep. Charles practically had to support her the last few feet to their quarters. He understood the depths of her exhaustion. He felt it also.

As soon as they were safely in their quarters, Trip began gently removing T’Pol’s clothing. He guided her into the bathroom and started the shower. As soon as she was in, he removed his own clothing and joined her. Trip gently began washing her, rubbing her back and applying neuro-pressure as he went. T’Pol felt so relaxed, so loved. He quickly washed himself and then dried her tenderly and led her to the bed.

Trip climbed in beside her and she snuggled up to him with her head on his chest. He looked down at her tenderly; her dark eyes were looking back at him. ‘Soon we will be home, t’hy’la,’ she sent through the bond. He kissed her forehead, ‘Yes, darlin’, soon we will on Earth but home is where you are and always will be.’ And they slept, happy in their ignorance of what was to come.

The End

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A whole mess of folks have made comments

This is your first ST fic? I hope you write more! This was excellent and so sweet.

I love the poll that Hoshi did.

This was wonderful! Please....more!

This was wonderful, first fic or no!! "ignorance of what was to come"?!?! I sure hope this means a sequel! The Vulcans sure won't be happy, and what about Trip's family? (No, I don't care if Archer is really alive or not!) :-)

wow sooooooo amazing wow more wow:-D mature and in character!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! A+++++++++

That was fantastic. What a wonderful start for your first fic. Hope you write more. Thanks for sharing.

I couldn't stop reading down to the very last sentence. I'm so glad you did this all at once instead of torturing us with a chapter at a time. It was a wonderful read. Thank you.

Hope there is more to come (hint, hint)! :)

Impressive. Great stuff!

This is your first fic? You write extremely well for this to be your first fic! Or do you just mean your first fic here because I'm not ready to believe you haven't done this before! I liked this a lot... and you wrote Trip especially beautiful! I'll have to look out for more of your stories.

Yes, we must have a sequel!
''happy in their ignorance of what was to come''? I hope this isn't as ominous as it sounds.
Wonderful story that hopefully won't be your only contribution to this site.

Happy in their ignorance of what was to come, huh? This says sequel to me! An absolutely wonderful story -- I enjoyed every word of it. Thanks for sharing it, thanks for posting the whole thing at once, and thanks for giving us a Trip and T'Pol story so filled with happiness --even Archer's presumed death didn't cast a shadow! I'll be watching for more of your work.

Excellent first trek story, I really loved the communication between TnT. But I agree with the above, 'ignorance of what was to come' was a sneaky way to slide a cliffie in at the end. Hope you write a sequel. Really great work.

Wow! This was your first attempt at fan fic? Surely you have written before. You did a wonderful job of developing the characters and in resarching the vulcan practices. I hope you write a sequel. The way you ended this story certainly sets up a follow-up story of what happens once they return to earth. Good job!

This was absolutely beautiful, *perfect*, with so many wonderful and touching moments I wanted to cry for the joy of it! Bravo! I am hoping you have a sequel up your sleeve. I just adored how natural this felt, the way you wrote Trip and T'Pol had me cheering. Thank you so much, Ali D :~)

Lovely. Enjoyed it very much!

your first!! well let me congratulate you!

a well done job.

a very interesting angle on the whole relationship. i liked it very much.

my favorite bits

1) Trip knowing the meld vow from T'Pol, her suprise of that.
2) Hoshi winning big!

Wonderful! Please don't stop....

Amazing, the was absolutely amazing! I hope a sequel comes soon!

Amazing, the was absolutely amazing! I hope a sequel comes soon!

That was excellent! Most, most excellent! I just loved the earlier "sleeping" together!

A++ Nice job!

OMG! That was so sweet! I had a goofy grin on my face the whole time!!!

OMG! That was so sweet! I had a goofy grin on my face the whole time!!!

WOW...I find it hard to believe this your first stab at writing fan fic; it's got a lot of
depth and maturity to it. Love the way you wrote Trip and his feelings....with a last line like
that you've GOT to complete it. We demand a sequel!!!!

This was a great story! I wish there was more!

That rocked!!!!!!!!!! You rock and this whole site rocks!!!!!!!!!! And I adamantly refuse to believe that that was the first time you've done this, cos if it is, damn your good!!!!!!!!!!!! Sorry for all the exclamation marks but they seemed necessary. And I sense a sequel, don't keep hanging, keep 'em on coming

Wow, perfect. Thanks for making my day. This cannot be your first fic. It is too good! :)

Looking forward to the sequel. (nudge nudge)

Keep up the fantastic work!

Wow, perfect. Thanks for making my day. This cannot be your first fic. It is too good! :)

Looking forward to the sequel. (nudge nudge)

Keep up the fantastic work!