The Sacrifice - Ch 5

The Sacrifice

By Triplover

Disclaimer: See Chapter one.
Summary: See Chapter one.

A/N: Sorry it took me so long but you know how it is. Sometimes you just get writers block! Anyway, I hope this chapter works right. I was working like crazy to make sure it made sense and everything. Normally this is easy for me but when you’re balancing work, school, graduation (which is driving me insane) and many other things… well you just don’t get the chances to do this kind of thing. Thankfully things have calmed down once again and I’m not panicking anymore… for now at least! Anyways, enough with my boring chatter! On to the story!

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Chapter Five

Last Resort

Jonathan Archer was relieved when the Roelorian government contacted him and told him to pick up T’Pol, but he couldn’t believe that Commander Tucker had told them that he’d killed Ambassador Vassion and Assistant Utaine. He wanted to talk to him, find out what was going on. He’d heard that there were witnesses claiming that Trip had killed them, but Archer knew the truth. He knew a few things so far.

First, he knew that the Xindi were somehow involved in all this. He also knew the Xindi might have been the ones to kill the Ambassador; and if that were true, then that might mean the Xindi were planning something. He had a feeling that whatever the Ambassador wanted to tell him was why he was dead. Trip was in serious danger if Jonathan was right and Enterprise right along with him…. The Roelorians were going to execute Trip, which could mean that some of them might be working with the Xindi. In addition, if they were working with the Xindi that might mean the Xindi had something up their sleeves for Enterprise, and he doubted it was an ‘I’m sorry for trying to kill your entire race’ card.

Archer wasn’t sure what was going on, but he’d find out what the Xindi wanted and then he’d stop them. He no longer trusted the Roelorians, and why should he? If they were in league with the Xindi then his mission had just gotten a hell of a lot harder. He knew they had to be working together—what else could explain why their weapon was at the scene of the crime? –yet the Roelorian government had dismissed it as Trip’s weapon. Trip was in trouble, and Archer was beginning to think that working with the government would not work anymore. Something told him that whatever was going on wasn’t good and would mean a huge change for everyone one Enterprise… and perhaps Earth… they couldn’t stop them.

No! He couldn’t think that way. He’d get his engineer back, one way or another. Archer had worked with the government, but if they were going to kill his engineer then he’d have to do what he had to do. It had been his last resort to break Trip out of jail but it seemed like his last resort was becoming his only resort.

==

Trip Tucker breathed out slowly as he nuzzled his cheek on T’Pol’s stomach. They lay on the cot; his head still on her stomach, resting. His eyes were closed. He’d never felt so comfortable. Even with the surroundings they were in, he didn’t want to leave; he didn’t want to do anything to change what they were doing. T’Pol was stroking his head, letting her hand wander through his hair. He didn’t know what had changed; he had no idea how they went from colleagues to…to…whatever they were. But he knew what they were doing was not something colleagues did. This was more. This was what people in love did. Maybe he’d been wrong, maybe she did have the same feelings. It was then that Trip realized he didn’t have much time left. He was going to die. And this time he wasn’t sure if even Enterprise could save him.

Trip moved his head to look at T’Pol. Her gaze drifted from the ceiling to look into his eyes, his movement knocking her out of whatever trance she hand been in.

“Are you all right, Mr. Tucker?” she asked. He smiled warmly at her worry.

“You know if ya keep askin’ me that I think I might go crazy.”

“Commander, I was merely concerned,” she shot back to him. Trip wasn’t sure what to say to that, so he chose to just move on.

“T’Pol… I think we should talk.”

“Talk about what?”

“Well first of all, I think we’re a little past Commander or Mr. Tucker. I call ya T’Pol,so why don’t you call me by my name?” Trip began. He was tired of Commander and Mr. Tucker was beginning to annoy him.

“As you wish, Charles,” she said. The sound of his name coming from her lips made all the fears he had melt away. He knew he would be dying, but at least he would die knowing he wasn’t alone. At least he would die hearing her treat him like more than a colleague. Trip didn’t know why that had been so important to him. It was only a name; but perhaps it wasn’t the name that meant so much to him, but the fact that it was T’Pol saying it.

“T’Pol…I’ve uh…I’ve been keepin’ a secret that I’m not so sure I wanna keep anymore,” Trip told her first. Finally, he sat up, swinging his legs over the side of the cot. T’Pol did the same, trying to avoid touching his back with her legs. She said nothing; she simply listened to him. “T’Pol I… I… never told ya how much those neuropressure sessions meant ta me. I mean, how much I enjoyed them.”

“They are helping you sleep.”

Why did he feel déjà vu here? He’d never told her that before. “It’s more than that T’Pol.” There it goes again!

“What do you mean?”

“T’Pol, I… I can’t stop thinkin’ about ya. You're always in my thoughts… even when we’re in a crisis and I’m workin’ on the engines or something, you're still in the back of my mind. I’ve felt like this for a while now, but I didn’t know how ta tell ya. I just didn’t know how you’d feel about all this. I figured you didn’t feel the same way, so it was best to ignore it…but then after the whole thing with Sim well… I just… I got tired of it all. Everything’s been different since what happened with Sim.” He felt his stomach flop at that last statement. It had been a huge understatement.

Since the day he’d woken up to find Phlox standing over him, he’d felt as if he were a ghost. Watching his clone in that casket was strange enough. Then he began to feel things. Things he couldn’t quite understand. Thoughts would pop up in his head that he’d never thought of before. Of course he’d felt something for her, but since his operation those thoughts had all but taken over. It was as if he knew something but couldn’t quite figure out what it was. He didn’t understand it himself, so it was hard to put into words

Trip tried desperately to keep his eyes down and not look at her. He had no idea what he’d do if he saw disapproval in her eyes. He would never have said any of the things he’d just told her if it were not for the fact that he was about to die. Thinking of his future had made him suddenly realize just how important it was to him to tell her how he felt, before it was too late.

“I know,” she said simply. Trip looked at her in a mixture of confusion and shock. How could she know? She couldn’t have known about his feelings before… could she? She couldn’t know what changed after Sim gave up his life… could she? How could that be possible?

“I’ve been…getting these feelings. Feelings I don’t quite understand. I get déjà vu a lot and I think it’s because…it’s something Sim experienced. It’s almost like I know what’s happened…but I don’t have any memories of his life. It’s like we’re connected, and somethin’ in my brain tells me I’ve done this before, but I know I haven’t. Am I makin’ any sense here?!” Trying to explain was giving Trip a headache and he really didn’t need another pain right now. His back was killing him, his entire body ached and he already had a weird feeling in his head. He could still feel an aftereffect from the drugs put in his system. His senses were heightened, and he wasn’t used to the feeling.

“I believe you are. You have no memories of Sim’s life, yet you feel like somewhere in the back of your mind it is in there. It is like seeing something, yet never attaining it as if it were never really there.” The way T'Pol described his feelings, it sounded like it was coming from personal experience. Finally, Trip stole a glance at her, she was looking straight ahead and he could see that she was reliving memories of her own. Something was on her mind.

“Hey.” He moved his hand to her back and stroked it gently. “You okay?” he asked.

T'Pol looked at him and he instantly saw something in her eyes. A pain he'd never seen before.

“I am fine. I was…thinking of Sim," she told him.

He smiled softly. “Ya spent all that time trying ta save me, and here I am bout ta die anyways. Ironic huh? Guess I was never supposed to survive. Maybe the cap’n should have let me die instead. Sim deserved life just as much as anyone else did.”

“The captain knew we needed you. Sim would not have lived for very long; it was logical to have Sim die since you would live for far longer.” She was triying to help, but it did not do much good although, Trip knew it didn’t make much of a difference now.

“I’m still a dead man T’Pol, and now Sim’s sacrifice is in vain. I’m still gonna die and Enterprise is gonna be without its chief engineer.”

“We have been in positions like this before, Charles. We have always gotten through it without the loss of life. You have been in many close calls,” T'Pol reminded him.

“Yeah, but somehow I don’t think I’ll be getting out of this one alive,” he whispered. He hated to say it, but he knew better. The fact was, Trip was probably going to die and hope was useless.

“You should not talk like that. The captain has gotten us out of situations like these before, and he will again. I will not lose you.”

Trip hadn’t realized just how much she cared for him until that last sentence. He looked into her eyes as she looked back into his. Finally, he moved his other hand to her cheek and smiled once again.

“Sometimes…we just don’t have a choice T’Pol. You're gonna have ta let go if the cap’n can’t save me. Sometimes people just have ta let go.” He could see the resistance in her eyes. She didn’t want to accept the inevitable. “It would be illogical not to, T’Pol. You of all people should know that.” Her eyes did not change. She wanted to be illogical. He could tell. Trip knew her well. Her face showed something he never thought he’d see in a Vulcan. It was something he couldn’t quite believe. A look that stopped his heart.

“I know T”Pol…I’m scared, too. I know.” He held her close, her head falling to his shoulder; he suppressed a wince since his whole body still hurt.

“Vulcans do not feel fear,” she reminded him. Trip allowed her that comment; he wouldn’t disagree or say anymore about it. She was a Vulcan, and Vulcans didn’t like feeling fragile anymore than Humans did. He supposed it was one thing their races had in common. Although of course, both were way too stubborn to admit it. He didn’t think he’d ever understand Vulcans, except for T’Pol. He understood her. Finally.

“I want to see my officers!” a voice shouted from the door. Trip recognized it immediately.

“I will bring out Sub-Commander T’Pol but you are not permitted to see Commander Tucker,” the guard talking to him protested.

“I don’t give a damn what I’m permitted to do! He’s still my officer and I want to see him!” shouted Jonathan Archer. Trip smiled at the voice. At least he knew T’Pol would be safe.

The guard paused. “All right… but only you!” he said. There was another pause and the door opened, Archer walked in and smiled at the two before him. T’Pol didn’t bother to move away from Trip. Her head left his shoulder but that was all. Trip moved away and stood. Then she moved right after him.

“Hey Cap’n,” Trip greeted. Archer had a strange expression on his face at that moment, one of mixed emotions. Fear, anger, compassion and Trip could have sworn a little worry and sadness.

“Hey Trip, you okay?”

Trip rolled his eyes. “God, I wish people would stop askin’ me that!”

“He had been hurt by the guards. They beat a confession out of him. He did not commit the crimes.” T'Pol's voice was back to the calm it usually was. Trip was glad to hear it back since he certainly didn’t like it when she was distressed.

“What happened, Trip? How bad did they hit you?” asked Archer. Trip could sense the worry and anger now. Trip smiled warmly at the man and rested his other hand on the captain’s shoulders.

“I’m fine sir. A little sore but the pain is dulled.”

T’Pol moved her hand and began to take off his shirt to show the captain his hurt back. Trip allowed it and turned around. He could hear a gasp come from Archer. Trip turned back around and covered himself, uncomfortable with letting his wounds show. He didn’t know why. But then again, lately, he didn’t know a lot of things.

“They used that whip didn’t they?! I asked them not to!” exclaimed Archer. Trip moved his hand back to the captain’s shoulder.

“It’s okay Cap’n… after awhile I didn’t feel it anymore. It barely stings.” He was lying of course. His back was killing him and just the slightest touch would probably make him cry out in pain. It was swollen and he wondered if it was infected as well. Wouldn’t surprise me one bit! Why does everything always happen ta me? Why did I have ta be the one ta lose the family member? Why did I have ta be the one ta get arrested? Why do I have ta be the one about to lose his life? And why in god’s name do I have ta always be the one gettin’ beat up?

“Maybe I could get Phlox to come down and treat your back,” Archer offered.

Trip shook his head. “I’m a dead man Cap’n… no need ta waste time treatin’ me when I’m gonna die anyway.”

“You’re not going to die, Trip! I won’t let these people execute you for something you didn’t do!” Trip could see the fire in his captain’s eyes. The man was angry; he was going to fight until there was nothing left. Fight until it was over. Trip had seen that look before.

“Cap’n, I understand what you're doin’ but if it endangers the crew, I don’t want ya doin’ anything. I won’t let them suffer.” Trip said sternly. He wanted that to be made clear.

“Trip, I’m the captain… I think I can handle what we do and don’t do.”

Trip sighed. Ever since they’d arrived into the Expanse the captain had changed. Trip wasn’t sure he liked the change much. Archer was cold, unfeeling… and ruthless at times. Trip just hoped Archer hadn’t treated Sim badly, although he had a feeling he had, which sent a shiver down his spine.

“Look, Malcolm and Hayes are working on a plan to get you out of here. Just stay put… it won’t be much longer now,” the captain said in a low voice in case the guard was listening. Then he looked at T’Pol. “Are you ready to go? Travis is waiting in the shuttle along with Malcolm.”

T’Pol looked back at Trip. She didn’t want to say good-bye since that would denote that she might not see him again. Instead, she simply nodded. Trip nodded back as she and the captain walked out the door. T’Pol’s heart sank as the door closed.

==

Trip walked slowly to his cot and let out a long breath before plopping down and wincing in pain. He then slowly moved to his side on the pillow as he pulled out the necklace he’d been able to keep. The guards had let him keep it since it was obviously not some devise to help him escape. He let it dangle down, swaying back and forth before him. “Looks like ma luck ran out, Mama. Wish ya didn’t have ta lose another child…but at least ya can know it was out of love. Yer son did it fer the love of his life. She’s the only one worth givin’ this ring to. I did it for her, Mama. I did it for her,” he whispered and closed his eyes, letting the ring move to his chest.

Continue to Chapter 6

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A handful of people have made comments

I thought Malcolm was usually the negative one.!! what is up with Trip?. He seems so resigned to dying. Where is his optimism and hope. There is always hope, isn't there? I don't like the fact that he is giving up so easily. I hope Archer has a plan to rescue him even though he is being so noble about dying. Please update soon. Thanks.

I love the dialogue between Trip and T'Pol. I like the fact that T'Pol is trying to keep Trip strong and confident. She still never told him how she felt though.... but she knows how to show it. As usual triplover, I applaud your characterization. Great stuff. More chapters as soon as your busy schedule allows!

We all know the Expanse had gotten to Trip. But Ocean is right, he's being awfully negative. Malcolm is supposed to be the Grim Reaper. Then again, maybe he's not resisting death as much because it will save T'Pol. ove is a powerful thing.

I really liked this chapter, liked the conversation between Trip and T'Pol. Although, was it wise for ARcher to tell Trip, in the alien cell, with no way of knowning if they were being monitored, that Hayes and Reed were working on a plan?

Can't wait for the next chapter!

Ok, i know developing a story can take time, but get to where trip is dying already! I'm dying here! seriously, i'm gonna actually cry if trip dies. I try to avoid fics where that happens, i can't control my reaction.

Don't worry, the reason for Trip's reaction will be explained in the next chapter... I thought you guys would wonder about that... I thought ahead.