Attraction- Part 4

Attraction
An "Enterprise" story

By Alison M. DOBELL
RATING: PG-13
ARCHIVE: Yes. Just let me know where.
FEEDBACK: Welcomed
EMAIL: AlisonMDobell@aol.com
WEBSITE: http://carlajane.50megs.com/Ali00.html

SUMMARY: "Lieutenant Reed manages to return but is wracked by guilt. No one seems to know the best way to reach Commander Tucker."
DISCLAIMER: The usual disclaimers apply. The characters and 'Enterprise' are the property of Paramount. No infringement of copyright is intended.

Chapter 4

"FRIENDS"

* * * * *

Sub-Commander T'Pol could not rest. Sleep would not come. Meditation was more concept that reality. She sighed and got up. Quietly she dressed then did something she could not even explain to herself. She went to Commander Tucker's quarters. Used the security over ride code to gain access. As the door hissed shut behind her she stepped into the middle of his quarters and closed her eyes on tears. His lingering scent brought a bitter-sweet comfort to her. She had come so close only to lose him. Why did she feel this need to be with him? He was Human. She was Vulcan. There could be no future between them but there could be, and was, friendship. Was that what she felt now? In the silence of her own mind she could admit the first stirrings of truth. She opened her eyes and walked slowly around his quarters, familiarising herself with the contents. Smiling sadly at the odd collection of things he chose to keep close to him. As she took it all in she felt her understanding of him deepen. Along with the very real need to bring him back. But how?

* * * * *

*Trip?*

The Commander tore his gaze away from the sunset and looked at his companion. "Mmm?"

Lieutenant Reed looked thoughtful. *We're asleep, right?*

*That's right*

*And all the time we're sleeping we're... here. In a kind of dreamscape*

*I'm just trying to figure this out* He paused. *I don't understand what they want with us. Or rather, what they want with you*

*What's that supposed to mean? We're both trapped Mal in case ya hadn't noticed*

He nodded. *I noticed but that's not what I meant. I keep thinking about what she said. How you were the one who had created this place*

*Well she's succeeded but what if she's right? What if this is from your mind?* Trip sighed. *We could suppose all kinds of things Mal but it wouldn't solve anythin'.*

*How do you know that?*

*It's just a feelin'.*

They sat in silence, both wrapped up in their individual thoughts. After what could have been seconds, minutes or even hours Lieutenant Reed spoke again. *I don't have any regrets you know*

*About what?*

He looked at the Southerner. *This. Everything*

Trip tilted his head slightly. *Everythin's an awfully big area. Care to narrow that down a little?*

*Why?*

*I dunno, just make it more manageable I guess*

The lieutenant paused, suddenly feeling a little shy. *I'm glad we're friends, Trip*

A smile blossomed on the Commander's face. The man did have an incredible smile. A thousand watts and counting. *I'm glad too but don't be so damn fatalistic. We're not dead.*

*Not yet*

Trip frowned. *What's that supposed to mean?*

*It means what are we supposed to do in here? What if whatever has us trapped decides not to let us go? How long can we be trapped in your mind before we die?*

His words stunned Commander Tucker. It was something that had not occurred to him. As he began to become anxious they became aware that the entity was with them again. Her thoughts caressed their minds, seeking to calm them. *I promised I would not let you come to harm.*

*Then why not let us go?* Demanded the lieutenant.

It was all very well getting all touchy-feely but he had had enough of this. He wanted to go back to the Enterprise. She answered him gently, her thoughts the faintest stirring of a warm wind against his. *Is that what you really want? More than anything, Malcolm?*

*Of course it is.*

The moment the thought was expressed darkness engulfed him. For a split second he melted in terror, his thoughts and feelings truncated by the sudden sense of relocation. How bizarre was that? Hell was hell whatever you chose to call it. Whether it was flames and a devil with a trident and a tail or the most beautiful sunset you had ever seen. Panic surged through him. A weight on his chest. Air pumped harsh and unrelenting in lungs that struggled to grasp every bit of atmosphere it could grab into his lungs. Dr. Phlox was immediately alerted by the bleeping on his console. Quickly he hurried over to Lieutenant Reed's biobed awaking a dozing Hoshi Sato. The Ensign looked up with bleary eyes. Not comprehending what was happening. Dr. Phlox checked the lieutenant's vital signs, a slow relieved smile gracing his lips as the unconscious man began to stir. He beamed at Hoshi.

"I do believe Ensign that Lieutenant Reed is waking up."

Her eyes filled with sudden tears. She clasped the hand nearest to her and gave a gentle squeeze. As they watched, Lieutenant Reed blinked, coughed softly and opened his eyes. "Bloody hell, it worked. I'm back!"

Hoshi laughed and hugged him. Dr. Phlox activated the com. "Dr. Phlox to Captain Archer."

The com crackled slightly. "Yes, doctor. Is there a problem?"

"No problem Captain. I just thought you would want to know. Lieutenant Reed has just regained consciousness."

The doctor could hear the relief and excitement in the Captain's voice. "On my way, Archer out!"

Hoshi was babbling, she knew she was but she could not help it. She was so glad to see him. She had been so afraid he would never wake up. He smiled to reassure her then turned his head, eyes settling on the still form of his friend. All joy shuddered to a halt. "What about Trip?" He asked quietly.

Dr. Phlox checked the monitor then double checked his vital signs. The smile froze on his face. Sadness echoing in his eyes though he tried to sound upbeat. "I'm afraid there is no change, Lieutenant."

Lieutenant Reed felt a wash of guilt and anguish sweep through him. He closed his eyes on fast building tears, berating himself. "Oh God, what have I done?"

* * * * *

The sudden feeling of isolation was almost too much for him. He had been able to stand it before because he had Malcolm. Now he was alone. What joy could there be in paradise with no one to share it with? Tears glistened in his eyes. His heartbeat faltered. She became anxious for him. *He wanted to go back, Trip*

*What makes ya think I don't?*

Silence. He stared at the sunset, tried to lose himself in its' beauty but it just made his heart ache more. He closed his eyes, silent tears rolling down his cheek. He felt her apology kiss his cheek but it could not dry his tears. Then he was alone again. Wrapping his hands around his knees he put his head down and wept.

* * * * *

Captain Archer all but flew into sickbay. His stride quick and strong, his eyes anxious but filled with hope. Lieutenant Reed was sitting up on his biobed, Dr. Phlox fussing around him. Hoshi holding his hand for support. He could not meet the Captain's eyes. He had been with Trip but he had blown it. His own selfishness had propelled him back to the Enterprise and left his friend trapped. He had no idea how he knew that, he just did. It was why he had stayed in sickbay instead of going back to his room. Why he had wanted to reach out to his friend, to form a link however tenuous to the way back home. If he had to break his body into breadcrumbs to do it he would have done it but the wicked witch of the west had stolen the gingerbread house and Hansel and Gretel would never see the goose that laid the golden egg again. If he only had a cow to sell he could go back. He shook the foolish jumble of thoughts out of his head. He was worse than he thought. Insanity really had got him good this time.

"Lieutenant - Malcolm - how do you feel?"

He lifted red rimmed eyes and looked at the Captain. Captain Archer was shaken to see how traumatised he looked. Guilt swum in those glittering orbs confusing him. What the hell did Malcolm have to feel guilty about? Then he realised it was because he had come back and Trip had not. He swallowed hard. Whatever had happened. Whatever was going on. He was sure of one thing. It was not Malcolm's fault.

"Trip's still in there, sir."

He knew he would have to go carefully. The man looked as close to breaking as he had ever seen him. That thought alone scared him. "In where, Malcolm?"

Lieutenant Reed looked across at the other biobed. The one with the unmoving figure resting on it. Laid out like a cadaver awaiting the mortician's knife. It brought tears again to his eyes. Willpower alone stopped the tears from falling. What right did he have to cry? This was all his fault. *Oh God Trip, I'm so sorry.*

"Malcolm?" Prodded the Captain gently when he still had not spoken.

"I'm sorry, Captain. You were saying?"

Captain Archer drew up a chair and sat next to Hoshi. She went to get up, to give him her seat, but the Captain shook his head. Right now Lieutenant Reed needed all the reassurance he could get. "I was asking you where Trip is. I need you to tell me whatever you can about what happened, where you've been."

He swallowed slowly then nodded. In a small voice he began to tell him, his eyes straying every now and then to his friend.

* * * * *

She was so weary. How could a few days feel like eternity? She sighed and sat on his bed for no other reason than her legs no longer wanted to hold her upright. She sat there deep in thought. Remembering the first time she had ever met the affable and irrepressible Chief Engineer. His smiling teasing face fixed on her and daring her to shake his hand. She could see that he knew Vulcans hated to be touched. The dare in his eyes tinged with a skimming of hostility. When had that changed? When had her haughty superiority begun to see the Humans as worthy beings in their own right? She had learnt to respect and trust Captain Archer. The emotional Humans had caused her so many emotional epiphanies, the Commander being the reason for most of them. Why? Why him? Why had it been so important to him to provoke emotional responses from her? And then, just when she decided he was not worth the effort, he would prove to be as insightful as any Vulcan. His passions were unruly but his loyalty was unequivocal. There were many things she admired about him even as she cursed him. And now. What did she feel? Not relief that the annoying human was silent but sorrow. She missed him. Worried about him. Wished she had told him how she felt. How she *wanted* to feel. Only she had not dared. He was Human. She was Vulcan. He might just as well have been born with a *Do Not Touch* sign pinned to his body.

T'Pol sighed. Her heart felt heavy. Worn out mentally from trying to think a way out of the problem only she had too little information. Perhaps it was a virus of some kind? Yet the Commander had been nowhere the rest of them had not gone. And what would affect the Commander and Lieutenant Reed with equal intensity? Why those two out of a ship of 83 souls? She frowned and applied more thought. Obviously she was missing something. Besides her favourite most annoying Chief Engineer. A yawn surprised her. It was getting very late. She should return to her quarters but she could not bear to. Instead she lay back and closed her eyes. She would rest for just a moment then make her way back to her quarters. Her empty and very lonely quarters. It was a shock when sleep claimed her but not as big a shock as waking. At least. It felt like waking.

* * * * *

The morning shift found many souls bleary eyed from lack of sleep. Captain Archer stopped by sickbay before going to breakfast. Lieutenant Reed had been checked out and released but hovered anxiously by Commander Tucker's biobed getting in the doctor's way. Dr. Phlox let out a sigh of exasperation and looked at the Armoury Officer. "Lieutenant, you do Commander Tucker no good by preventing me from doing my job. I will ask you for the last time to leave sickbay or I will be forced to sedate you."

Captain Archer interrupted before Malcolm could plead with him to let him stay. "I don't think that'll be necessary, Doctor."

Dr. Phlox looked relieved to see him. Judging by the look of Lieutenant Reed he had got no sleep last night whatsoever. No doubt worrying about his friend and blaming himself. He walked over to Trip's bed and looked down at him. The face looked thinner, paler even than yesterday. He knew the doctor was doing all he could but it was not enough. He put a hand on Trip's shoulder, his eyes misting slightly. "Come on Trip, wake up. Chef's got a stack of pancakes with your name on them."

No response. The Captain sighed. His heart aching. He looked at the doctor. "What's the prognosis doctor?"

Dr. Phlox looked at a loss. "I don't know what to tell you, Captain. I have no idea why he is in this state or why he does not simply wake up."

"I told you." Mumbled Lieutenant Reed, his eyes fixed doggedly on Trip's face.

"Then tell us again, Malcolm." Urged the Captain.

"Told you last night," He said in a dull voice. "You didn't listen to me then why listen to me now?"

"Because you have been through this with Trip, we haven't. We need to know what we're up against Malcolm, even if we can't understand it."

Malcolm looked at the Captain, sighed again, then looked down at his hands. "It sounds fantastic I know." He said wearily, slowly taking a seat. His eyes flicked back up to review the expression on his Captain's face. He was listening intently. The Lieutenant's voice picked up slightly as if encouraged. "She's not an organic lifeform you see. Said the nearest thing we could equate her to was a thought form."

"Her?"

He nodded. "Yes. She also said the place where we were Trip had created." He paused and looked at his friend, a hand reaching out to rest protectively over one of Trip's cold ones. The cool flesh was a shock to his system surprising a solitary tear. Captain Archer watched in morbid fascination as it trailed down the Tactical Armoury Officer's cheek. For such a self contained man these signs of grief moved him deeply. Touched his own sorrow and gave him an odd kind of comfort. How moribund was that? It reminded him of a saying: *misery likes company*. It made him feel pathetic but also underlined the humanity they shared so precariously in this sometimes violent universe. Even when space was not being hostile it was not always being friendly either. The proof lay insensate on the biobed next to them.

* * * * *

Sub-Commander T'Pol was convinced she was dreaming. To test her theory she reached out with her thoughts to the figure sitting staring at what looked to her like a multicoloured cloud of light. At first nothing happened. T'Pol tried again, this time calling him with her mind. *Trip, can you hear me?*

His head jerked up. *T'Pol, is that you?*

She stepped forward, her movements cautious. A building excitement trembling through her. His head turned slowly then everything in the universe froze. Time had no meaning. Life and Death were formless. They stared at each other. Slowly Trip got to his feet, his mouth opening and closing, his thoughts a tangle of emotions. As she drew near to him she could see he had been crying. Her heart went out to him, her hands reached for him.

*T'Pol, I can't believe you came*

*How could I leave you?*

He fought back tears of joy. *I don't understand how you got here*

*Does it matter?*

Her gentle thoughts soothed him, her arms engraced him. The relief was almost as profound as his joy. A pleasure so bright it was almost painful. Exquisite. He held her so lightly. Frightened he would crush her with the overpowering need flowing through him. He had been lonely for so long. His thoughts surprised her. *I never thought of you being lonely, Trip.*

He loved hearing her use his nickname. It gave a warm flush to his cheeks and filled his heart with affection. He looked at her for a long time before responding. Committing every detail to his memory, etching the feel of her, the scent of her, the very vibrancy she represented in his soul to his heart. If this was a fleeting joy he intended to never forget it. *Just because you're surrounded by people doesn't mean ya can't be lonely, T'Pol.* He said gently.

A nod was her response. How succinctly he put it. The words could have been describing her not him. She allowed a hint of humour to soften her features. The deep sparkle in her eyes alerting him. *You have an illogical way of being alone.*

His smile warmed her heart. Sent it racing at a speed she was sure he could feel through their clothing. *I said lonely not alone.*

*I know what you said.*

His smile became a grin. Knowing instinctively that she was teasing him about his alien encounters. *Ya know none of that was my fault, T'Pol.*

An arched eyebrow was her only response. He laughed brightly and hugged her to him. So pleased to see her. So happy to no longer be alone. He sighed softly with deep content. Savouring her scent as he hugged her gently to him. Never wanting to let her go. She allowed it. In fact craved it. Neither of them knew how long they stood in each others' embrace. Gradually their thoughts mingled in happy accord. Trip telling her everything that had happened since him and Malcolm had fallen into this sleeping trap. T'Pol recounting the efforts of Captain Archer and Dr Phlox to find a solution and bring them both back. He traced a finger gently down her face, watching how the multicoloured light reflected off her skin. Feelings stirring in him that excited and cautioned him. She was Vulcan. He was Human. He did not want to ruin the friendship they had by seeking more than she was able to give.

T'Pol tilted her face up at him. An expression in her eyes that made him go weak at the knees. Surely not? He raised his eyebrows. *I somehow don't think your mother and father would approve of me.*

She smiled. It was faint but it was there. For some reason it made him deliriously happy. *This does not concern them, Trip.*

That surprised him. *Wouldn't you be shunned if you took up with a Human? Ya know, thrown off the family farm, disinherited, that kind of thing?*

*I am already disowned.*

That shook him. Pain pinched the corners of his eyes and made his heart contract. *Ya are? How come?*

She rested one small hand over his heart, her eyes swallowing his in their liquid depths. *When I broke off my wedding plans with Koss I shamed my family. A dutiful daughter does not bring disgrace on her house.*

Anger flowed through him. A deep rich vein that left her heady with delight. He was angry for 'her'. Defensive. Protective. Fiercely loyal. *I'd say they should be grateful. Marrying a man ya hardly know just because it was arranged fifty years ago is barbaric. Any parent with any love for their children wouldn't let them be married off like that. It isn't right and it isn't natural, T'Pol.* He paused and tried to calm down. *We got rid of slavery centuries ago. How'd an enlightened species like yours hang on to somethin' so antiquated and wrong?*

His argument amused her. *It is the Vulcan way.*

*Then it's time their ways changed.*

She looked at him. Lost in the innate goodness she saw in his eyes. What had he once called them? Ah yes. Windows of the Soul. She liked that term. Liked him. Like shifting sands something was altering inside her. Something precious being born. Given flight and the means to go from her heart to his. A seductive warmth tingled through her. She raised a hand to cup the side of his face in her palm. His eyes widened but he said nothing. Such complete trust shone back at her. Gently her fingers splayed and found the contact points. Her touch as natural as if they had come out of matching moulds. Never mind their culture. Never mind their species. The heart finds a perfect match of its' own. He smiled gently at her then opened wide the doors to his mind. As simple as taking a single breath she entered those hallowed halls. A journey they would take together.

The presence watched them. Savoured their joining. What they called the bonds of friendship the presence called by another name. Transfixed it watched. The colours of the sunset changing, deepening in exotic hues that matched their silent passion. The melding of minds witnessed in the hushed cradle of eternity. It seemed forever before T'Pol withdrew her mind from his. They stared at each other as if seeing one another for the very first time. Awe shone on their faces. Something deeper flickered in their eyes. Neither wanted to go back to how they once had been. Trip spoke first. *That was incredible.*

*Are you lonely, Trip?*

His smile was gentle. It almost glowed through the pores of his skin. His soul shining through the physical tapestry of his mortal shell with quiet happiness. *Not any more, darlin'. Not any more.*

* * * * *

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Four of you have made comments

still mysterious, still enjoying it.

kept wating for more TnT... and i'm getting it!

Oh btw, who ever formats/posts... can you all check out the right margin? italic text lines are chopping off the last letter... makes it a bit difficult to read smoothly when the t's n's and other last letters get cropped in the thought dialog.

thank, tracy-thenaggingcube

That was beautiful! I loved how this dreamscape has given T'pol the 'permission' to let down her guard. And it was so touching how Malcolm is so guilt-ridden. I am so loving this story. Thank you and am looking forward to the next chapter.

By the way, the formatting seems fine on my screen - ie no cut-off words

another lovely chapter. I do love the way you write these two. Keep it coming, and the format's fine with me, too.