Unfulfilled- Part Six

Unfulfilled

By Samantha Quinn

Rating: Pg-13, Romance/Angst. Lots and lots of angst. **Future Fic.***
A/N: There’s been a slight change of plans. Charlie’s POV will come later.
Pookha, I credit you with the “love, honor, and duty . . . “ line. Because, frankly, your review summed up the entire point of this fic. :) As for the rest of my reviewers- you won. There’ll be more parts.

Part 6

Phlox’s POV

***^^^^***
A Week Later. . .
***^^^^***
Tonight my patient sleeps for the first time in a week. It is a turbulent sleep, however, as T’Zal’s body is still recovering. Vulcan bodies may be resilient, but the toil of pon far threatens even their enormous strength. But she’ll recover, thanks to the help of the Ambassador and Admiral, whose ranks secured a quicker transport for her mate, veritably saving her life.

I’d really rather not reflect on that incident. I consider both the Admiral and the Ambassador my friends. To see them both in such obvious states of unhappiness is extremely painful to me.

I cannot shake the feeling that if Denobulans slept nightly as Vulcans and Humans do, I would be sharing the same uneasy slumber that T’Zal demonstrates tonight. For I cannot help but wonder how much of a role I might have played in my friends’ discomfort. Not only that of the Ambassador and the Admiral, but of Commodore Tucker as well, whom I also consider a dear friend.

Years ago, it was I that first suggested to Captain Archer that he may have been harboring unresolved sexual tension towards his first officer. If I had not taken that step, perhaps he would have been content to withhold his sexual urges. I know, of course, that T’Pol sought him for a mate, yet she undoubtedly would not have done so if she did not believe reciprocation was probable. After all, I was privy to her decision-making involving choosing a mate. The “logic” in choosing Admiral Archer was in part based on his feelings towards her.

Years ago, it was also I that suggested T’Pol assist Commodore Tucker with his loss using the quite intimate procedure of Vulcan neuropressure. Despite her protests, I managed to convince her that the sessions would be a benefit. Sadly, the incident with the Xindi colony proved me wrong. I cannot help but postulate that perhaps it was during those very intimate sessions that the seeds of the Ambassador’s affection for Commodore Tucker first began to grow. As much as I would like to believe that Koval’s conception was simply the result of Vulcan biology and timing, I know the Ambassador well enough to know her misery runs deeper than that.

Ah, Koval. Perhaps my greatest error was not in the interference I did take, but in the interference that I didn’t take when I could have. When T’Pol first showed up in sickbay with the early symptoms of pregnancy, the biosigns revealed a truth she herself would never verbalize. I am quite possibly the only other sentient being besides T’Pol that knows Koval’s true parentage. Maybe I should have broken my silence then.

I could not have, of course. It was not my right to do so and speaking would have violated doctor-patient confidentiality. Regardless of the ensuing pain it has caused my three closest friends, I could not have told either Commodore Tucker or Admiral Archer the results of my scans. Doing so would have been unethical.

Doctor’s ethics. Have I truly followed them, or have I made a mockery of them in the strongest possible way? Human doctors must take the Hippocratic Oath; Denobulans have a similar vow. First do no harm.

I cannot shake the feeling that I have contributed to a great deal of harm to my patients’ lives.

But regardless of my contribution to their misery, I am not the one forcing them to remain within their unhappy spheres. It is, on an immensely sad level, quite an interesting study in human feelings – a term I’ll apply even to T’Pol. Watching them, I have learned that love, honor, and duty are demanding, and often conflicting, taskmasters.

It is no doubt because of their conflictions that my well-meaning friends have chosen the wrong paths- ones that have caused them the most pain.

Admiral Archer’s attempts to resolve the three have resulted in his remaining loyal to a marriage in which there is no passion. I know T’Pol cares for him, but not nearly in the fashion that a human such as him craves to be loved. From their visit a week ago, I can deduce that their sex life is active, if not necessarily fulfilling.

******^^^^^^^^********

“Is she going to be okay, Phlox?”

“No.”

******^^^^^^^^********

There was a decided wistfulness to the Admiral’s “no.” Still, the only reason for T’Pol not to have experienced pon far during the nineteen years she has been married to Admiral Archer would be that sexual release is frequent.

Yet the wistful tone was enough to convey the Admiral’s belief that frequency did not equal fulfillment.

The Ambassador also conveyed a sense of loss during her visit.

******^^^^^^^^********

“I am curious, T’Pol. What did Stokar mean when he said ‘perhaps we will be successful this time’?”

“He most likely was referring to conception.”

“Conception?”

“Indeed. Vulcan females can only conceive during pon far.”

******^^^^^^^^********

It is fortunate that we were alone for that conversation, I suppose. Fortunate not only because it would have revealed Koval’s true parentage, but because T’Pol’s voice also held a note of wistfulness.

Does her wistfulness reveal her to be thinking of a fourth former Enterprise crew member? Did my summons invoke painful memories of her own pon far – one that she shared within that Romulan prison with Commodore Tucker?

No. If the memories were painful, she would not have thought of them wistfully. Perhaps more accurately, she was reflecting on pleasant memories whose loss has transformed them into unpleasant thoughts to dwell upon.

Memories shared with equal strength by Commodore Tucker. Although I do not see him as frequently as I see the Ambassador and Admiral, we do keep in touch. I am able to relish the tolerance he has taught to young Charlie for other cultures. It is a trait that the stubborn and headstrong Commander Tucker did not always possess.

Then again, Commodore Tucker experienced many changes since his time in the Romulan prison with T’Pol. I often wonder if Admiral Archer sees any of the changes. While I do not understand how it is possible that he could not see them, he has given no indication that he has. Would not a friend as dear as Admiral Archer was to Commodore Tucker attempt some course of action if he saw the simple lack of joy in his friend’s life? The carefree Commander of yesterday is gone.

How could the Admiral not see the difference? Humans have a saying, “love is blind.” I suppose it is true in the case of my friends. Or perhaps more accurately for them, “love is foolish.” Then perhaps his subconscious is refusing to see what is so obvious. For if it did, would it not also have to deal with the ramifications?

I recall that T’Pol used to offer the opinion that Commodore Tucker was not serious enough. I imagine that opinion has changed somewhat in the past nineteen years.

Or perhaps it changed in the span of only two weeks – the two weeks it took Enterprise to rescue Commodore Tucker and T’Pol. The time in which Koval was conceived.

I suppose if I am honest, I cannot possibly take the credit for the feelings between Commodore Tucker and Ambassador T’Pol. For even when she would complain--no, Vulcans don’t “complain,” --even when she would voice the opinion that Commodore Tucker was illogical, irrational, not serious, or otherwise flawed, there was always an undercurrent of playfulness. The same playfulness would frequently be evident in Commodore Tucker’s responses. Of course, there were times in which both grew exasperated with one another. Yet, underneath even their harshest moment of disharmony lay a foundation of innate respect and trust.

I see no such playfulness between the Admiral and the Ambassador. Nor do I see any playfulness between Commodore and Natalie Tucker. The respect is there, most certainly.

Sadly, T’Pol has no doubt learned by now that even a Vulcan thrives on playfulness.

No, I suppose that is an inaccurate assessment. There is utter joy in their interactions with their children, even for the Admiral whose own relationship with Koval is somewhat strained. But their own interpersonal relationships with their spouses is entirely void of liveliness that once defined the relationship between T’Pol and Commodore Tucker.

They have all made terrible mistakes and continue to propagate their own misery; yet, I blame none of them for their current situation. Instead, I feel only sympathy for the utter sadness of their situations.

While there can be no blame cast towards them or for myself, something did go awry along the way. I could indulge in the Human tradition of “what if”. What if the Admiral had paid better attention to the blossoming relationship between his best friends? What if the Ambassador had not been initially frightened off by the raging emotions of Commodore Tucker? What if Commodore Tucker had plainly told the Admiral his true feelings for the T’Pol?

All of these events would have taken less than a minute to achieve. In that fraction of time in which other choices were made, the lives of my friends were irrevocably changed forever. It’s distressing how a quirk of circumstances and choice can so drastically change the course of one’s life for the worse.

If they were Denboluan, they would simply end their unions. But Denobulans do not hold fast to the foolish notions of love, honor, and duty in the same manner Humans and Vulcans do. Vulcans bond for life and Humans entertain foolish notions of “fairy tales,” in which there must always be a happy ending. Ah, fairy tales. I recall fondly my Foosil’s introduction to them. Ironically, it was in a conversation that involved a young Charlie and Koval along with a quite irate Maggie Reed.

******^^^^^^^^********

“I’m not going to play a wimpy maid that can’t defend herself,” Maggie informed her playmates.

“Perhaps she is right, Charlie. This whole story does lack in logic,” Koval spoke up. “Pumpkins simply cannot turn into a transportation device.”

“But you have to. That’s how Cinderella goes,” Charlie protested. “And besides, Koval, you can’t wimp out. You have to be the fairy god-mother.”

At Maggie’s giggle, Koval protested quite loudly, “I will NOT.”

“Who is Cinderella and what is a fairy god-mother?” Foosil questioned.

“Cinderella’s a fairy tale. A fairy god-mother is someone who grants the deepest wishes you have,” Charlie provided. “Koval just doesn’t want to be one cause in Cinderella she’s a girl.”

“Koval could be the prince,” Maggie suggested.

“No, I’m gonna be the prince,” Charlie argued.

“I will be the dragon,” Koval stated.

“Perhaps I could play the fairy god-mother, if you’ll tell me more about these fairy tales,” Foosil offered.

“Okay. The first thing you have to know, is that they always have a happy ending,” Maggie told him.

******^^^^^^^^********

I hope for a happy ending for my friends. I care for them all and want to see them experience joy again. Unfortunately, I do not see how their present conditions could lead to such a ending. Although T’Pol may very well be figuratively locked in a tower away from her prince, the Admiral is not exactly a dragon. If that were the situation, then perhaps there would be hope for them. The situation is much more murky and conversely, so is the inevitable end. I fear that unless there are truly fairy god-mothers in existence, there will be no happy ending for Admiral Archer, Ambassador T’Pol, and Commodore Tucker.

****^^^^****

Continue to Part Seven

Return to Part Five

Back to Fan Fiction Main Menu

Have a comment to make about this story? Do so in the Trip Fan Fiction forum at the HoTBBS!

Seven people have made comments

An excellent and insightful part of the story. I loved the touching air of sadness and wistfulness that pervades this piece and like Dr Phlox wish things had turned out differently. As he so rightly says Archer is no dragon, if he was we could just get Trip to slay him and everyone would live happily ever after. Thanks for another great story part. Ali D :~)

Woot! Woot! Woot!

I just love this story. Please, keep writing it.

Phlox, that insightful Denobulan. I'm wondering just exactly how this fairy tale ends...

Wow! What a great addition. More please

I didn't like this piece as well as some of the others. I think it's pretty in character, and fits the situation, but . . . I don't know. My other least-favorite (not that that's saying much, as these are very good) was the one from Archer's perspective, as it didn't quite sound like him.

By the way, what happened to Charlie's pov? When you're done with this series, will you write something else in this universe? Maybe about the Admiral finding out the truth? Koval and Maggie's relationship? Charlie and Koval later in life?

Any possibility of Trip and T'Pol ever getting together for real? Wouldn't have to involve the Admiral either finding out or dying; the way their relationship is going, I can see the two of them getting divorced as soon as Koval's been out of the house for a few years. Natalie strikes me as realistic enough to get out of the way on her own, once Trip's got a relatively clear shot at T'Pol.

Actually, I can see Natalie and Archer together as a couple, starting out by commiserating over their respective love lives and ending up together. I doubt there'd be any way to salvage Archer and Trip's relationship, not that that's anything to worry about with Archer as immature and bitchy as you're writing him. Or maybe, he could actually grow up a little so he's not acting like a two year old anymore (ok, ok, that's a little harsh. A ten year old, maybe).